The dark wasn’t very dark to me, and the cold felt sharp like vinegar, but not in a hurting way. Everyplace I went, there were these currents like waves in the air, and I could draw them through my long wolf nose and roll the smell of them over the back of my tongue. It was like a whole different world, with bright sounds everywhere and rich, strong smells.
And I could run.
I started running because a car came by while I was sniffing at the garbage bags on the curb, and I was really scared of being seen in the headlights. So I took off down the dirt alley between our house and the Morrisons’ next door, and holy cow, I could tear along with hardly a sound, I could jump their picket fence without even thinking about it. My back legs were like steel springs and I came down solid and square on four legs with almost no shock at all, let alone worrying about losing my balance or turning an ankle.
Man, I could run through that chilly air all thick and moisty with smells, I could almost fly. It was like last year, when I didn’t have boobs bouncing and yanking in front even when I’m only walking fast.
Just two rows of neat little bumps down the curve of my belly. I sat down and looked.
I tore open garbage bags to find out about the smells in them, but I didn’t eat anything from them. I wasn’t about to chow down on other people’s stale hotdog-ends and pizza crusts and fat and bones scraped off their plates and all mixed in with mashed potatoes and stuff.
When I found places where dogs had stopped and made their mark, I squatted down and pissed there too, right on top, I just wiped them out.
I bounded across that enormous lawn around the Wanscombe place, where nobody but the Oriental gardener ever sets foot, and walked up the back and over the top of their BMW, leaving big fat pawprints all over it. Nobody saw me, nobody heard me, I was a shadow.
Well, except for the dogs, of course.
There was a lot of barking when I went by, real hysterics which at first made me really scared. But then I popped out of an alley up on Ridge Road, right in front of about six dogs that run together. Their owners let them out all night and don’t care if they get hit by a car.
They’d been trotting along with the wind behind them, checking the garbage set out for pickup the next morning. When they saw me, one of them let out a yelp of surprise, and they all skidded to a stop.
Six of them. I was scared. I growled.
The dogs turned fast, banging into each other in their hurry, and trotted away.
I don’t know what they would have done if they met a real wolf, but I was something special, I guess.
I followed them.
They scattered and ran.
I ran too, and this was a different kind of running. I mean, I stretched, and I raced, and there was this joy. I chased one of them.
Zig, zag, this little terrier-kind of dog tried to cut left and dive under the gate of somebody’s front walk, all without a sound—he was running too hard to yell, and I was happy running quiet.
Just before he could ooze under the gate, I caught up with him and without thinking I grabbed the back of his neck and pulled him off his feet and gave him a shake as hard as I could, from side to side.
I felt his neck crack, the sound vibrated through all the bones of my face.
I picked him up in my mouth, and it was like he hardly weighed a thing. I trotted away holding him up off the ground, and under a bush in Baker’s Park I held him down with my paws and bit into his belly, that was still warm and quivering.
Like I said, I was hungry.
The blood gave me this rush like you wouldn’t believe. I stood there a minute looking around and licking my lips, just sort of panting and tasting the taste because I was stunned by it, it was like eating honey or the best chocolate malted you ever had.
So I put my head down and chomped that little dog like shoving your face into a pizza and inhaling it. God, I was starved, so I didn’t mind that the meat was tough and rank-tasting after that first wonderful bite. I even licked blood off the ground after, never mind the grit mixed in.
I ate two more dogs that night, one that was tied up on a clothesline in a cruddy yard full of rusted-out car parts down on the South side, and one fat old yellow dog out snuffling around on his own and way too slow. He tasted pretty bad and by then I was feeling full, so I left a lot.
I strolled around the park, shoving the swings with my big black wolf nose, and I found the bench where Mr. Granby sits and feeds the pigeons every day, never mind that nobody else wants the dirty birds around crapping on their cars. I took a dump there, right where he sits.
Then I gave the setting moon a goodnight, which came out quavery and wild, “Loo-loo-loo!” And I loped toward home, springing off the thick pads of my paws and letting my tongue loll out and feeling generally super.
I slipped inside and trotted upstairs, and in my room I stopped to look at myself in the mirror.
As gorgeous as before, and only a few dabs of blood on me, which I took time to lick off. I did get a little worried—I mean, suppose that was it, suppose having killed and eaten what I’d killed in my wolf shape, I was stuck in this shape forever? Like, if you wander into a fairy castle and eat or drink anything, that’s it, you can’t ever leave. Suppose when the morning came I didn’t change back?
Well, there wasn’t much I could do about that one way or the other, and to tell the truth, I felt like I wouldn’t mind; it had been worth it.