The Problem with Forever

I gaped. Now I had no idea what to say.

He eyed my pizza.

Okay, then. I picked it up and took a bite. Better than sitting there staring at him like a fool.

“Anyway, I’m not in trouble,” he said, picking up a napkin and wiping his fingers off.

I thought about that as I took another bite and then dropped the pizza on the plate once more. “You don’t get in trouble, because they...” I peeled off another pepperoni and handed it over. His fingers brushed mine this time, warming my skin. “They don’t expect anything from you? Is that what you’re saying?”

Rider lifted a shoulder again, not responding.

Holy crap, that was what he was saying. Unsettled, I glanced at my half-eaten pizza. “Is that true?”

He glanced at me and his lashes lowered, shielding his eyes. “I think it’s kind of...kind of good that you even have to ask that.”

I folded my hands in my lap. “What do...you mean?”

Finishing off his pizza, he twisted at the waist and faced me. I straightened, but there was little room between us. As close as we were, I could see the golden flecks in his eyes when his lashes lifted. A small grin was on his lips, but it seemed lacking. “You’re in a good place,” he said. “Have been the last four years. You were taken in by great people. Doctors. You’re not living that other kind of life anymore.”

“But...but you said Mrs. Luna was good?” Worry rose. Had he lied?

He reached into the small space between us and tapped his forefinger off my hand. There were no paint smudges on it today. “She is. She’s great, but...look, it doesn’t matter.” His finger traced the line of the bone, skating across my palm, toward my wrist. “I’m not in trouble. I’m not going to get into trouble.”

It did matter, though, because it made me think the school didn’t think Rider was worth the trouble. Or worse yet, he didn’t think that he was. And he was. I started to tell him just that, but he turned over my hand and threaded his fingers through mine. My thoughts briefly scattered.

Rider was holding my hand.

He’d done that a lot when we were little, but it felt so very different now. So much so that I couldn’t help but stare at his hand, at how much larger it was than mine, rougher and harder.

You’re not living that other kind of life anymore.

But he was, even though I had a feeling he didn’t have to.

Knowing that I should pull my hand away, I mentally lectured myself when I didn’t. His holding my hand seemed innocent, but I doubted that Paige would see it that way. Wouldn’t blame her if she didn’t.

Rider squeezed my hand. “What do you think about the speech we’ve got to do?” he asked, changing the subject. “Your topic is the three branches of the government, right?”

I nodded. I’d told him about the deal Carl had made with Santos, and he had thought it was a great idea. Everyone probably thought it was a great idea, because no one thought I could do it anyway.

Santos wouldn’t let us pick our own topics for our first speech, which wasn’t surprising. Rider got different art styles in painting. I stared at our joined hands. “The topic...should be easy.”

“It will be.” He let go of my hand, his fingers trailing across my palm and leaving behind a wake of shivers. “You got this.”

Seeing that I had two weeks to prepare for the speech, plus a few days until I had to give mine, since I didn’t have to give it in front of the class, I thought I had this handled, too.

“You wanna practice?” he asked, picking up his water.

“Seriously?” I asked. I was planning to ask Ainsley to help me, because even giving my speech in front of Santos alone would be super difficult for me. Just thinking about it right now had my stomach churning. There had been no way I could ask Keira. I would be way too embarrassed.

Rider nodded. “Yeah. Whenever you want to get together, we can.”

My heart flip-flopped. “What about work?”

“It’s flexible.” He glanced at the plate, and I knew what he was going to say before he asked it.

“Yes,” I intervened. “I’m going to finish that.”

A grin appeared and the dimple winked. “That’s my girl.”