The Problem with Forever

His hand slid over my thigh and then between them. My entire body felt like it was on fire. Tension built deep inside. It was hot and tight and I didn’t understand it. Unease curled low in my stomach as I gripped his arm. Some of the heat faded as my eyes fluttered open.

“Rider,” I said, and he kissed me again, and for a moment, I got lost in that kiss, lost in what his hand was doing. It felt good, but I...

Oh, God, I wasn’t ready for this.

“Can we...slow down?” I whispered, my hand tightening around his wrist.

His hand immediately stilled as he lifted his head. “Yes. Yeah.” He cleared his throat as he eased over, drawing his hand away from me.

I squeezed my eyes shut against the sudden burn of tears. God. I didn’t even know why I wasn’t ready or if I should be. I had no idea, and now I feared—

“Did I hurt you?”

My eyes flew open. “What?”

He was staring at me intently. “Did I do something wrong?”

I couldn’t answer. Nothing he’d done felt wrong. Quite the opposite.

“If I did, I really want to know. I promise I’ll—”

“You didn’t hurt me,” I said. “I just... Why would you think that?”

He lowered his gaze. “I...I haven’t done a lot of this.” His cheeks flushed pink and my eyes widened. “I mean, I’ve done some stuff, but not a lot. I haven’t...had sex.”

For the longest moment I couldn’t respond. All I could do was stare at him. “You’re a virgin?”

One side of his lips kicked up. “Yeah. You sound surprised.”

“I am. I thought... I don’t know. You were with...Paige. I just assumed you had sex before.”

“That would be a negative,” he replied, picking up my hand. “You’re looking at me like you don’t understand how it’s possible.”

He could really read minds.

“It’s gotten close, but I just never— I haven’t wanted to go that far.” He shrugged a bare shoulder.

“I haven’t done it, either,” I blurted out. “I mean, that’s super obvious since...you’re the first boy I’ve kissed, but yeah, I don’t even know...what I’m saying and I’m just going to shut up.”

Rider chuckled. “Don’t. I love it when you ramble.”

“Only you would enjoy that.” I curled my fingers through his. “Do you want to...go that far with me?”

His lashes swept up and his eyes, with their greenish flecks, met mine. “Yeah. Yeah, I do. Someday.”

Warmth swept across my cheeks as I whispered, “I...I want that, too. Someday.”

The dimple in his right cheek appeared. “Then we’re on the same page.”

“Yeah.” I lifted my head and kissed him. “I’m sorry about stopping. It felt good, but—”

“Mallory, please don’t apologize.” Rider sat up, pulling me along with him. “We can do whatever you want, go as far as you want and we will always stop when you want, no matter what. You feel me? There’s nothing to apologize for and that’s the way it should always be.”

Oh my God.

Rider wasn’t perfect, but he was damn close. Actually, he was perfectly imperfect. A giddy rush hit me, and I grinned at him.

“We should head down there, huh?” he asked, and I nodded. Rider picked his thermal up and pulled it on over his head, pausing to grin at me. “Sorry. I’m going to have to cover up. I know it’s not fair.”