The Problem with Forever

I couldn’t think about Carl and Rosa right now. I’d deal with the fallout when I got home, and it would be a huge fallout, because I knew what I was doing was right.

And it was also wrong.

The first place I checked was the Lunas’ house. I’d found a spot about two blocks down and jogged up the block, against the brisk wind whipping down the street. I saw Hector’s Escort. People wearing bulky jackets and skull caps sat on the steps of the homes as I hurried past them and walked up to the front door. The autumn-themed wreath on the door had been replaced with evergreen and mistletoe.

Renewed anger hit me as I remembered what Rider had said about the school administration. That they saw certain addresses and then didn’t even try. I never thought Carl and Rosa would be the same.

Sirens wailed off in the distance as I knocked on the front door, reminding me of yesterday. A shiver curled down my spine.

Heavy footsteps were heard inside and I tensed. The door swung open, and a tall, older man was standing there. He took one look at me and frowned. “Who are you?”

“I’m looking for—”

Another guy appeared behind him. I recognized him from yesterday. He’d been at that house, but I didn’t know his name. “You’re Rider’s girl.” He shouldered the other man aside. “You lookin’ for him?”

I nodded. “Is...he here?”

“Yeah. Upstairs. The attic last I saw him.” He stepped aside, letting me in. I swallowed hard as I looked around. The living room was crowded. I glanced back at the guy. “I’m so sorry about Jayden. I...”

His eyes glinted as he closed the door. “They ain’t gonna get away with that. Aw, no. No way in hell they gonna get away with taking my blood,” he promised, and I shivered again. The other man shook his head as this guy, who I was guessing was family, pointed to the stairs. “It’s a little crowded up there.”

I thought that was a little weird, because even though I hadn’t been up in the attic, I was under the impression it was pretty big, but I turned and headed up the stairs, passing a very tall, dark-haired woman who was dabbing a tissue under her cheeks. I didn’t see Mrs. Luna, but all I could think about was what Jayden had said to her before. That she wouldn’t know what to do without him. My chest squeezed.

On the second floor I walked down the hall, past open doors. I didn’t let myself look in, because I didn’t want to see if any of them was Jayden’s room. I couldn’t see that—see his stuff. I walked past Rider’s bedroom.

At the end of the hall, I opened the door. The narrow staircase was dimly lit, and there was a stale, earthy scent that reminded me of Jayden. Holding on to the railing, I made my way up and crested the top of the stairs.

Sunlight fought its way through the dusty attic windows, casting enough light that without the lamps on, I could still see.

And I saw.

I saw the mattresses and stacked pillows.

I saw the card table covered with bottles and cans of soda. And there was Rider’s phone, on that table.

I saw the TV that wasn’t turned on.

I saw the couch.

And my heart stopped and then dropped. Dropped like the stars falling out of the sky. My lips parted on a soft inhale. I’d found Rider. He was asleep, his head resting against the back of the couch. He wasn’t alone.

My bag slipped down my shoulder and hit the floor with a thud.

Paige was there, curled up on the couch beside him.

Chapter 32

The sound of my bag hitting the floor didn’t wake them. Paige stirred, though. She curled in more, pressing into Rider’s side. Seeing that was like taking a punch to the stomach.

I couldn’t believe what I was seeing.

For what felt like the hundredth time in twenty-four hours, I was absolutely dumbstruck, and my brain had a hard time catching up to what was happening.

I opened my mouth, but a sinking feeling cut me off as I stared at the two. Then my gaze cut to the table, to where Rider’s phone sat. He hadn’t answered any of my texts or calls. I’d believed it was because he was with Hector, and he was here, at home, but he wasn’t with Hector. The punched-in-the-stomach sensation increased.

The guy’s words from downstairs came back to me. It’s a little crowded up there. Now I knew what he’d meant. Oh my God. Pain lit up my chest, and it felt so very real. Like my chest had been cracked right open.

As horrible as it was, I wasn’t thinking about Jayden in that moment. I was thinking about the time Rider and I had spent together before we’d walked outside. How he’d held me. How he’d kissed me. Touched me. What he’d admitted to me.