Kelly drew in a deep breath to counteract the quantum leap of inner agitation and spoke as persuasively as she could. 'Mr St John was very generous to me this afternoon.' She flushed at the evasion of the full truth. 'He listened to me about the lambs, Grandpa. If I can get him to listen to me again…' She sighed at the enormity of that task alone. 'What else can be done?'
The two men shook their heads. They were not impressed by the idea of her interceding for them. But they were unable to come up with any alternative suggestions that might get them out of trouble. They stared down at Octavian Augustus the Fourth. The ram stared back in royal disdain of the whole affair. The beat of the helicopter overhead reminded them that each minute passing was an extra indictment against them.
'It might help, Judge,' Michael O'Reilly said gravely. 'Kelly's got a way with her.'
'Anything's worth a try,' the judge nodded. 'Not that I expect any success.'
'It's the only thing that's fair now,' Kelly said. She was nervously aware that the kind of petitioning she was about to do needed every advantage she could think of. 'I'm going to shower and change,' she said, cementing the decision.
Nevertheless, uncertainties churned through her as she stripped off her riding clothes and hurried into the bathroom. She remembered Justin's pride. He wouldn't have her marry him because of the horses. How would he react to an offer to marry him because of a ram?
She felt faint at the thought that he might very well spurn her. And his anger might then rebound on her grandfather and the judge.
But what else could she do? If her grandfather was sent to gaol, it would kill him. And the judge and Arlene Moffat would suffer such dreadful humiliation if they were caught in what they had done.
Kelly had t
o save them if she could. The only power she had over Justin St John was the power of her attraction to him. He did want her. She was certain of that. But, if he scorned to marry her, what could she do then?
Her heart beat more rapidly as she realised the full import of what she was thinking.
But it wasn't really like that! Kelly frantically argued the point over with herself. It wasn't as if Justin St John meant nothing to her. And he certainly wasn't repulsive to her.
He had spoken the truth this afternoon. If they had been somewhere else, somewhere private, she wouldn't have stopped him from making love to her. Because that was what she wanted. She had excused herself before with the tenuous argument that it was in the heat of the moment. But that wasn't the full truth. Self-honesty demanded she face it.
A shiver ran over Kelly's skin as she stepped from the shower. She dried herself vigorously with a towel in a futile attempt to wipe away her physical self- consciousness. It was impossible. Her body played traitor, remembering the sensations, the wanton desire that Justin St John had aroused. The moral dilemma in her conscience exploded into nothingness with the full blast of self-revelation.
She wanted Justin St John. She wanted to live with him, to sleep with him, to love him, to have his children, to please him and to take her pleasure from him. And damn everything else! Whatever the age difference, however much he tried to reject what she could give him, she would be her own woman! Together with him, joined in love, it had to be right. He wanted it as much as she did.
She and Justin could overcome anything. Go on forever. They were soul-mates. Hadn't she felt it from the beginning? Something bound them together, and it would always be so… had to be so…across the total span of time.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
The walk up to Marian Park seemed longer than Kelly had ever remembered it. But she needed the time to think and bring her emotions under control. She had no problem passing through the cordon of men surrounding the property. What would happen when she reached the house became her main concern.
She tried to swallow her apprehension and devise some plan. If Justin didn't want to see her, what was she going to do? And if he did see her, the same question had to be answered. What was the best way to go about it? The closer she got to the house, the more daunting her task seemed to become.
This was going to be very much an ad hoc affair. She would have to float with the tide, see where it was taking her, adjust to whatever circumstances arose and seize any advantage she could. Her heart pounded one refrain over and over again, drowning out everything else. This afternoon she had been a fool. She had to reach Justin and never let him go again!
Roy Farley was in conversation with a number of hard-faced officials at the front steps of the house. He frowned at her appearance, but the way his eyes rolled over the curves of her body was more than flattering. Kelly hoped that the embroidered camisole top that she had teamed with her best white slacks was not too revealing of her intentions.
'Can I do anything for you, Miss Hanrahan?' Roy Farley asked. His manner was distinctly wary.
'I wish to see Mr St John,' she replied, her eyes challenging him with determined purpose. 'I know he must be very busy, but this is important.'
He hesitated, frowned again, and finally shrugged. 'He's in the drawing-room. Do you want me to announce your arrival?'
'It's all right. I can do that myself,' Kelly returned quickly, not wanting Justin to have any advance warning.
She hurried up the steps before Roy Farley could have second thoughts. Both the front doors stood open. Only the foyer to cross. Nothing could stop her now. It had all been much easier than she had anticipated. She prayed that Justin was alone. But even if he wasn't, he couldn't refuse to see her when she was right in front of him.
One of the doors into the drawing-room was slightly ajar. Kelly pushed it open without knocking. Her sense of urgency was too overwhelming for such niceties to mean anything. She stood in the doorway, her eyes seeking and finding Justin instantly.
He was seated on the sofa that faced the fireplace. His body was in a pose of total relaxation: legs stretched out in front of him, his head slumped back against the cushions, a drink of some kind nursed in one hand. He had not heard the door being opened. Nor did he sense Kelly's presence. He was staring at Noni's portrait. And the expression on his face…
The purpose that had driven Kelly here-to this place and this man and this moment in time- quivered into uncertainty as a tidal wave of insight crashed through her mind.
Noni…