Mend the Seams (Buried Secrets 3)

“She’s an idiot. You can’t possibly consider seein’ him, Savannah.” Colton’s voice booms, his shoulders squared tautly and seeing his rage of emotion to keep my family protected makes me feel safer. Static crackles followed by Ryleigh’s soft whimpers. Luke nods to Carly before disappearing through the hall into the nursery.

Carly Jo grips his hand and glances over at me, worry marring her eyes. “Savannah, I agree with Colton. I don’t think you need to be in the same room with him. There has to be other options for getting the divorce finalized.”

Tension throbs in my temple as the stress gnaws at me. I didn’t want to get into this tonight. I was hoping to push it to the back of my mind until I could clear my head and consider all the options. I have to consider what’s best for the kids. “It’s really just all up in the air. I have a fifty-fifty chance that the judge could grant the divorce considering the charges that Josh faces, but he does have every right to fight me. The divorce could take as little as sixty days to finalize, or as long as a few years.” My voice rises an octave and the fear of being held captive by Josh for a second longer strangles the breath from my lungs. “I don’t have years. I can’t. I won’t.” My voice breaks again not able to find the words to even finish my statement. I shove back the chair quickly to walk outside. I need air.

One, two, three, four, five. One, two, three, four, five. His fingers are so tiny. His little face scrunches up, turning red before he visibly relaxes in my hands and sighs a shaky breath. “Luke, ya alright over there?” Alyson asks, pulling me from the blank trance I’m in.

“Wonderful, honey.” I whisper, barely able to take my eyes from the small life I cradle in my hands. I’m awestruck in absolute astonishment at how one tiny little body can change my entire outlook on life by simply takin’ a breath.

“Luke, you can lay him in the bassinette, or I can hold him.” Alyson says. I’m sure she’s worried about my unusual demeanor, but to be honest I’ve struggled these last nine months coming to terms with the epic changes we were facing. We weren’t prepared to become parents. We’re still young, still tryin’ to get on our feet. Hell, most months we scrape by to pay the rent and knowing we are now responsible for another tiny human life…well that’s just enough to shake the fear from anyone. I can’t tell ya the number of nights I’ve paced the floor filled with worry. But somehow, the moment my eyes met my son’s everything felt right in the world.

Standin’ up, I approached the hospital bed and Alyson opens her arms on instinct, vying to hold our sweet boy. Placing Sawyer in her arms she swaddles him close to her chest, then scoots over allowin’ me room to sit. My lips tug up naturally and I realize that not once has there been in any doubt in Alyson’s eyes. Somehow, I find comfort in knowin’ that although we may struggle with money and we don’t have any experience in the parental department, I know we’ll weather any storm life brings us to, together.

Cradling Ryleigh in my arms, I pat her bottom softly in rhythm to the sway of the rocking chair. She’s sleeping peacefully, soft sighs falling from her lips in her dreamy state. It’s hard to hold true love in my hands, knowing I’m so undeserving of it.

When Carly placed her daughter in my arms the day she was born, fear shook my core. I wanted nothing more than to play it off as if I’d never held a baby and was concerned I’d drop her, but Carly knew better. She could see the grief that washed over my eyes as I held Ryleigh, but Carly has always been persistent in pushing me in the right direction.

“Luke, ya alright in here, man?” Colton whispers, pushin’ the nursery door open.

Keepin’ my eyes locked on the tiny bundle of joy in my hands, I nod my head and whisper quietly, “I’m alright.” For the time bein’.

“Listen, Savannah got upset and took off outside. Carly wants you to go talk to her.”

Sighing, I press a gentle kiss to the top of Ryleigh’s brown curly locks and place her in Colton’s arms. “Alright, man. I’ll go check on her.”

Stepping around Colton, I clear the threshold when he says, “What’s goin’ on with the two of y’all anyways, Ashton?” He asks suspiciously.

Steeling my spine, I keep my back to him and my head hung low. “Just friends, Weston.”

He grunts his disapproval, increasing the pace of his sways. “Ashton, you know she’s broken. I know you mean well, but she’s vulnerable right now and I don’t think she’s thinkin’ with a clear head. Just…”

“Just what, Colton?” I didn’t realize my voice was laced with such anger, but I don’t like the assumption he’s makin’. But then again this is Colton Weston we’re talkin’ about. He may be by best friend, but he’s also a notorious ass.

He stands up and lays Ryleigh in the crib before steppin’ into the hallway. Squarin’ my shoulders I peer down at him and he brushes past me taking heavy steps through the hallway. I follow behind him, curious why he’s bringin’ this shit up. I’ve only tried to protect Savannah since I realized what was goin’ on, and now he wants to make ridiculous assumptions about us.

Savannah has just come inside and is gatherin’ the twins to go home. She looks up at me sadly, not hiding the shame and affliction that’s drownin’ her green eyes. I want to comfort her, but for the sake of argument I keep my distance. She quickly swipes at the stray tears tricklin’ down her face before turnin’ on her heels and leaving without a word.

The moment the flash of her headlights dim into the distance, Colton’s stowed anger reappears with a vengeance. “I don’t know what the hell you’re thinkin’, but I’ll tell ya what I see, Ashton.” His chest rattles as he yells, not caring who can hear or see his rage. “You couldn’t sink your claws into Carly Jo, so you’re attemptin’ the next best thing.” Carly’s jaw falls slack and she starts to yell at Colton but her words fall on deaf ears. “Do you friggin’ realize that she’s fallin’ apart, Luke? Savannah ain’t in the right mind to make any sort of decisions where a relationship is concerned. Hell, she’s still married, and although she’s fightin’ to close that chapter of her life, don’t you think her bed should at least get cold before you try climbin’ your nasty ass in it?” Carly interjects again, this time steppin’ between us. The change in the air is palpable, almost suffocating.

Anger rolls off me in violent waves, and I grit my teeth hard as I fist my hands at my sides. I know Colton’s only tryin’ to protect Savannah, but the accusations he’s makin’ only further rips at my skin. I could react like a dick, but I don’t think there’s enough space in the room for two dicks as ridiculous as he’s actin’.

Steppin’ back to put some space between us I look at Colton pointedly as I speak, my voice steady and calm. “You’re out of line. I’m not gonna stand here and justify my actions to you because guess what, Weston, we’re all,” I cut off momentarily, choosin’ my words carefully, “well, most of us are adults here.” His eyes narrow at my low jab, but I don’t give him the chance to argue. “I understand that you’re concerned for Savannah. But until you’ve listened to her cry herself to sleep at night, or you’ve witnessed the anxiety attacks that she’s experiencin’, then I don’t wanna hear your damn opinion.” Colton’s body remains tense, rigid in his stature. I relax into myself, shakin’ my head to clear it. My voice softens when I say, “Fact of the matter is, Colton, just like when she was havin’ the shit beat outta her – nobody noticed her but me. I’ll never compromise her marriage, I’ll never compromise our friendship. But until you’ve laid so shattered and ripped apart at the seams, then you can’t even begin to understand how she feels.”

Steppin’ around him, I take long strides towards the front door.

“And you understand how she feels?” He asks curiously, tiltin’ his head to the side to study me.

Colton doesn’t know about the demons I battle. Only Carly does. Glancin’ at her, her eyes are filled with tears and her face is weak, but apologetic. “This Carly bullshit you keep wantin’ to stir up – let it die already. I thought

we put that shit behind us. I don’t give it a second thought, but apparently it’s still gnawin’ at you.” I direct at Colton. “Thanks for dinner, beauts. I’ll holler at y’all later.”

Chapter Six

The entry bell chimes alertin’ the staff of a customer. I hear muffled voices exchangin’ conversation, then heavy boots pounding against the floor towards me. Looking up over the thin newspaper, I make eye contact with Colton. Without invitation he slides into the booth, clearin’ his throat as he relaxes against the cool vinyl.

“Mornin’, sunshine. You look awfully cheerful today.” I mock.

“Smartass.” He snaps back at me. “Carly Jo told me I’d find you here.”