But it scares me. How right it feels; the idea that I’m not from here. Here being, you know, solid ground. It does answer some questions I’ve always wondered about. The whole drowning thing and all, especially. However, it leaves so many more questions on the table.
Like, who were my parents? And what does that make me?
I walk to the fridge below deck and grab a bottle of the champagne we use for the sunset cruise, and pop the cork. I guess now is as good as any time to get properly drunk for my big 2-1.
I pour a glass of champagne and grab the platter of chocolate covered strawberries from the fridge, knowing I royally pissed the guys off, but with good reason. Walking back up to the boat deck, I prepare to watch the sunset all by myself.
Except when I get there, the guys are standing on the dock, waiting for me.
“You don’t have to run when you’re scared,” Eric tells me.
West steps forward, his hand on the boat railing. “And you don’t have to cry alone.”
“And you don’t have to sleep alone, either,” Crew adds, with a cocky grin I have memorized in the space of a day.
Kai shoots him a legit eye-roll. “And you don’t have to say yes either, but we’d like to join you for this sunset cruise if you’ll have us.”
I shake my head, wondering why they are still here, for me.
Wondering why they want a mess of a girl whose heart is in tangles. But when I look at them, so earnest and wanting, the parts of me that feel like wreckage, suddenly seem whole.
“So,” West asks. “Is that a yes?”
I nod.
It’s most certainly a yes.
15
Kai
Harlow hands me the champagne and turns on the boat’s engine. Seeing her in control like that is sexy as hell. She knows how to work this rig and I know how to work her.
Tonight, is going to be something else.
“What are you smiling about?” She asks, putting the boat in second gear and driving toward the open waters.
“So many things. Being here, on the water, with you.”
West and Crew are looking at the boat, eyeing the caliber of the vessel, and Eric is downstairs grabbing beers.
“This is all kind of crazy, you know. The last twenty-four hours,” she says, her pale pink hair blowing the breeze.
The air is heavy with the scents of saltwater and seaweed. It smells like home, being out here.
“I know.” I shake my head. “My dad is already pissed that I dropped out of law school to sail, and if he knew I may have fucked this gig up, he’s gonna be livid.”
“So, then what will happen?” Harlow asks. “I mean, will he get over it?”
“Hopefully.” I run a hand around my neck. “Thing is, my mom died when I was a kid and I have a trust fund that makes my life pretty cush. So, I won’t be left wanting, you know? But his support matters to me. He’s the only family I have.”
Harlow nods, and when I mention family there’s a far-off look in her eyes.
“Sorry,” I say, coming up behind her, and wrapping my arms around her waist, my breath on her exposed neck. “I shouldn’t have mentioned family tonight.”
“It’s okay,” she says softly, stopping the boat’s acceleration and letting it coast in neutral. “It’s just my parents have been so wonderful to me, that I’ve always feared to let them down, and now it’s even worse. Whatever is happening to me, it feels like I am going to be torn from them, forever. I don’t want to hurt the people I love, but I do want to find myself. It feels selfish, Kai.”
“It’s not selfish to want to be the person you were always meant to be. That’s brave. That’s badass.”
She sinks against me at those words, her ass against my groin. “Yesterday, all I said I wanted for my birthday was to be a more badass version of myself.”
“I think it’s happening, Harlow.” I kiss her neck tenderly, and she exhales, tilting her head to give me more access to herself. “You were all kinds of badass last night if memory serves me.”
Her shoulders move as laughter escapes her. “I don’t even know what last night was about.”
“Yes, you do,” I tell her, my hands moving from her waist to her breasts. She is wearing a strapless dress and I want to push it down, to hold her perfect tits in my hands. “It was about you taking what you wanted.”
Instead of giving into my most carnal impulse, I massage her breasts through the fabric, feeling her hard nipples, realizing she isn’t wearing a bra. Damn, I want her.
“I know what I want now,” she says with bated breath.
“Oh, yeah?” I ask, running my tongue over her smooth neck, another hand running low, past her belly, pressing against her pussy. “What do you want, Mermaid?”