As for Chloe herself, the closer they came to his father’s surgery day, the further away from her he pulled. As she watched him sleep, her heart squeezed hard in her chest. This was the only time his expression was soft and relaxed, not tortured. She wanted so much more for him than he seemed willing to accept or give, all because he refused to open his heart to anyone outside his immediate family. Loss. His fears were so real.
She traced a hand down his face and pressed a kiss to his cheek before rolling over, determined to fall asleep.
* * *
Beck was up early, without the help of an alarm clock, prepared to face the day. Though he’d told Chloe she didn’t need to come to the hospital, she’d been up and ready even before he was. They met up with his brothers in the waiting room, where Mom would come once she’d settled their father in.
Time dragged by and even his brothers, who were usually good for jokes and laughs, were silent. Chloe stayed throughout, bringing back coffee and snacks and generally doing whatever she could for his family but mostly for him. And when the surgeon stepped into the waiting room, she grasped his hand and held on tight.
The woman’s gaze came to his mother. “Mrs. Daniels?”
Audrey was already on her feet. “Yes, Dr. Skinner. How is he?”
Everyone had stood and waited.
The doctor smiled. “Surgery went well. We were able to go in laparoscopically as we’d hoped. We thought it was stage one, but it appears the cancer has grown through the wall of the colon but not…”
From there, Beck’s vision went blurry, and a rush sounded inside his ears. He heard the words lymph nodes, possible chemotherapy, and prognosis, and his world collapsed around him.
“Beck? Did you hear what she said?” his mother asked. “Although it’s stage two, they’re very hopeful.”
“Right. Like they were hopeful with Whitney.” The walls were closing in, and he needed to get out of here. “I have to go.”
His brothers looked at him with concern on their faces.
“Beck, wait.” Chloe stepped up to him. “I’m sure you want to see your father once you’re allowed, so let’s sit down and we can talk.”
He shook his head. He didn’t want to break down in front of her or, worse, feel closer to her while she tried to comfort him, an impossible feat at this point in time.
She placed her hand on his arm, and he deliberately shrugged it off, not wanting her concern or her pity. “I need to be alone.”
And on that note, he turned and strode out of the room and away from the hospital and the words that reminded him of another time and place, when the outcome hadn’t been positive at all.
* * *
Chloe watched Beck go and did her best not to take his rejection personally. She’d been watching him while the doctor discussed her findings and had seen him shut down, his expression go blank. The color had drained from his face, and she’d been worried about him even before he spoke.
“Chloe, don’t let him get to you. He’s not dealing well with Dad’s illness because it reminds him of something,” Tripp said, obviously not sure how much she knew.
She glanced at the man who’d lost his twin yet still seemed to be more composed than Beck. Everyone processed death differently, and Tripp was a medical professional. He’d had more experience with illness after his sister’s passing. Chloe had no doubt Tripp’s career choice had everything to do with his twin’s illness.
“I’ll drive you home, and by the time I get back, maybe I’ll be able to see Dad.” Drew glanced at her, his warm gaze comforting.
Audrey walked over to her. “Go on, honey. It’s going to be a long day, and you’ve done enough for us already.” She patted Chloe’s arm. “Thank you for being there for my son. I hope you don’t take his reactions too personally. He had the most difficult time processing Whitney’s death. I took the boys for counseling, but I honestly don’t think Beck really listened or opened up.” She lifted her shoulders and sighed.
“You did the best you could,” Chloe murmured. “And you were dealing with your own loss. Beck’s going to have to figure things out for himself.” She had the distinct impression he wasn’t going to let her help him, either.
Drew hooked his arm through hers. “Come on.”
“Are you sure? I don’t mind taking an Uber, and that way you can wait here.” She didn’t want to put anyone out on an already stressful day.
Beck’s brother nodded. “Positive. This way I keep busy instead of sitting around waiting.”
She shot him a grateful look and said her goodbyes. Both Tripp and Audrey promised to let her know if they heard from Beck, and she hoped he checked in with someone. His family had enough to worry about.