Yet, butterflies fluttered within my chest as I walked over to that box and wondered what he’d figured that I loved.
Oh great! He found my porno.
Stacks of magazines with naked men littered most of the box. Several Wall Street journals were in there, too, as well as my secret addiction. Crossword puzzles. I didn’t know what shamed me the most, that my crossword puzzles were hidden with my porn or that Maceo immediately knew all of the things I did in my free time.
I must look like some degenerate home body to him. Not that I care. Do I? No.
A knock came at my door.
“Glad to see you’re up.” Maceo walked in, carrying a bag that reeked of yummy food and a cup of what I hoped to be coffee in his other hand. “How are you feeling? Headache? Hung over? Horny and in desperate need of a pipe cleaner?”
“Pipe cleaner?”
“Some women call that sweetness between their legs a pipe. Usually when they just want a man to give them some and go home, they call him a pipe cleaner. You know? A handy man to clean out the pipes. I could elaborate and provide more graphic descriptions if necessary.”
I covered my mouth and giggled.
“Stop covering that beautiful laugh.”
“Tone it down, lover boy.” I grabbed the coffee from him. The cup warmed my palm. “Thank you … for everything.”
“Everything?”
“You know what you did.”
“I do?” He raised his eyebrows.
“You cleaned my office.”
His voice lowered to that seductive tone. “I may have.”
“You did. And thank you for the picnic?”
“You’re welcome.”
“And I’ll even say thank you for not mishandling my body last night on the roof.”
“Hmmm. You don’t remember?” He guided his gaze down my whole body. In that moment, I realized I no longer wore my clothes from yesterday—no St. Patrick’s Day shirt, jogging pants, and sneakers. It was all gone. Instead, I wore the sky blue shirt that he’d had on and nothing else.
O-kay.
“Why do I have your clothes on?” I asked.
“You tell me.” He placed the bag on the desk, took his time removing the food, and set it in two pairs. “Are you really trying to say that you have no idea what happened last night? None at all?”
“No. What happened?”
“Magic.” He raised his open hands in the air and formed a sort of imaginary rainbow. “Lots of heavenly magic. Our bodies collided.”
“You better be joking.”
“I don’t joke when it comes to explosions and magic.” He rubbed his hands together and gestured at the table. “Here’s breakfast! Lovely slices of bacon stacked on top of—”
“What really happened last night?” I stared at his shirt, clinging to my body.
“Can I finish serving you?”
“Absolutely not. What happened?”
“Before or after I was between your legs?”
My mouth dropped open. “What?”
The humor left his face. “Last night I made you a woman in every sense of the word. I now know every entrance on your body. I analyzed each one with my tongue. Dios mio, and the way you moaned. Priceless.”
I almost spilled my coffee. “Excuse me?”
He chuckled. “I’m lying.”
“You are?”
“Of course. I wouldn’t take advantage of you like that.” He took out a sandwich for himself. “Do you really want to know what happened? It’s not a good story. I like mine much better.”
“I don’t care. Tell me”
“We both fell asleep on the roof. You woke up at around three or four in the morning, and yelled that you wanted to show me what I was missing—”
“I wouldn’t say that.”
“Okay. You’re right. What you said was much worse, although comical.”
“What did I say?”
“Come here, Daddy. Let me show you that good good.” He made a point of making his voice higher and more feminine. “You said daddy a whole lot, in fact. And I must say, I really did want to see your good good.”
Oh God.
I covered my face with my free hand. “Okay. I would say that. In all fairness, I was drunk.”
“Oh yes. That was apparent when you fell over my legs and then unzipped my pants.”
“No, I didn’t.”
“Trust me. You tried to rape me.”
“You’re lying.”
He raised his hands. “I’m just a victim, telling a story.”
I yanked at his shirt. “Being that I’m wearing your clothes it doesn’t look like you gave up a huge fight.”
“I wanted to see what a good good was.” He shrugged. “Anyway, you unzipped my pants, pulled down my boxer briefs, and took my . . .”
I sucked my teeth. “Just say it, nasty man.”
He formed his lips into a huge smile. “You took my cock out.”
Why does he have to say cock like that? I just want to see it every time he says that damned word.
“So you let me take your cock out?”
He raised his hands higher in the air. “I was drunk and tired.”
“And of course you wanted to see what the good good was.”