Pause (Larsen Bros)

Nothing from him.

“So I’m asking you to marry me.”

Still nothing from him.

Oh, God. My hands are a sweaty mess. “If you would like to do that maybe?”

“Anna.” His throat moves as he swallows. “Are you certain that’s something you want as opposed to being something you’d tolerate to make me happy? Because it’s kind of a big deal. We’d be legally bound together.”

“I know.”

“Even if we ran off to Vegas and kept things on the down low, it’d be a big deal amongst our family and friends.”

I frown. “Yes. I know. People will have opinions. That’s what you’re hinting at, right? Most will be delighted, but not necessarily everyone. Thing is, as I said before, I don’t care. I refuse to care. I love you and I don’t mind who knows it. At the end of the day, this is about you and me and fuck everyone else.”

“Fuck everyone else?”

“Yes.”

He blows out another breath. “So that’s what the candles and rose and fancy dress are about?”

“It felt like it should be a big moment, you know?”

“I know.” His smile is gentle and sweet now. “And I appreciate it. I just don’t want you doing something to please me that you’re going to regret.”

Now I’m really losing my nerve. Mostly on account of me running out of words. Maybe he’s trying to let me down gently. Maybe I was wrong and we’re not there yet. But no. Leif loves me and I’m certain of that. I trust him. Though maybe this isn’t what he wants at all. A wedding and marriage and things changing again so soon.

“You’re frowning,” he says. “Stop that.”

“Of course I’m frowning, you haven’t said yes yet.”

“Huh?” he asks, brows drawn together. “Oh. Yes, of course. I thought that was obvious. I’d love to be your husband. It’d be an honor and a duty and a pleasure.”

“Thank goodness for that,” I mumble, my shoulders deflating.

“You were worried?”

“Just a little.”

He laughs, planting kisses on my forehead. “Please. I’m a fool for you. There’s no way on earth I’m not marrying you given half the chance. So long as it’s what you really want.”

“It really is.” I rest my cheek against his shoulder with a smile. “I promise.”

His big hand cups my face and maneuvers me into position for a long and deep kiss. A soul kiss. My absolute favorite. The scent of him and taste of him and just everything about him is the best. He still goes to my head like fine wine and he always will. Therapy has helped a lot with his nightmares. It’s also helping me get a grip on life, the universe, and everything. Neither of us will ever be exactly what we were before the accident, but that’s okay. Starting over taught me a lot, but without a doubt, he’s one of the amazing things to come out of everything. One of the things I’ll never stop being grateful for. While I know I could live without him, that I could have rebuilt my life alone if I had to because I’m strong enough and good enough, that I didn’t have to is a blessing I’ll never take for granted.

Just when I thought it was impossible, he made me believe in love again. I really am a lucky woman.