“Hi.” I was frozen in place. Slit throat. Did Tommy kill Leo himself?
Dario’s words from after Mexico rang in my head,
“Pop would’ve sent someone to do it for him. But my brother? Tommy will do it himself.”
“Get over here,” he put his phone on the kitchen counter.
I walked into his arms. He inhaled my hair.
“Wrong,” he whispered.
“Hm?”
“When we’re home, you use a different shampoo. When shit’s bad, your hair almost always smells wrong.”
“A sign we shouldn’t leave the house?”
“Maybe. Or you pack your shampoo when we travel.”
“If my hair smells right, things will be right?”
“Wouldn’t that be nice?” He kissed me, “Wanna go take a shower? I’ll wash your hair. Make it smell like home.”
“As nice as that sounds, I came down here for food. I’m starving. Didn’t eat much today. Baby’s hungry.” I patted my belly.
He dropped to his knees and k
issed my stomach and then pressed his forehead against it. I threaded my fingers into his hair.
“I love you,” I said.
Yes, he was someone who would kill but he killed to protect what was his. I was his. He was mine. I felt a burst of affection for him. Of course I still felt dread at what I’d heard but this man? This man was mine. He would keep me safe. I knew it with everything that I was.
“Could’ve been you,” he said.
“Hm?”
“Kate. That could’ve been you. Tess could’ve been you. Kate could’ve been you. Fuck, Tia. My head is fucked over this shit. You could’ve been raped, taken, dead. Some of it. All of it.”
I got to the floor with him and put my arms around him.
“I’m here. I’m okay. You saved me. Like you always do.”
“Johnny and those six kids sure as fuck aren’t okay. Tess isn’t okay.”
“None of this is your fault, honey.” I said.
He shook his head.
“I pushed Leo to this. I insisted he couldn’t be involved in Fete. Shouldn’t have underestimated him. Should’ve fuckin’ taken him out of the equation.”
“No. You can’t go murdering people because they might cause a problem. It’s not your fault what he did. It’s his fault.”
“If I’d taken him out, Tess wouldn’t have gotten raped and stolen from us for a week. If I’d taken him out, Kate would be beside Johnny, there for their kids.”
“You can’t play the ‘what if’ game, Tommy. You can’t play God, either. You can’t stop bad guys from doing bad things.”
“But I can do something. I can do my damndest to make sure nothin’ fuckin’ threatens you or the rest of my family again.”