Devil Said Bang (Sandman Slim 4)

Ipos comes out from under the desk. He wipes dirt from his knees and says, “Even without war we’re still trapped in chaos and fear. It reminds me of waking up here after the fall from Heaven.”

He looks at Merihim.

“Do you remember? How many brothers and sisters cut their throats or threw themselves off the high mountains?”

“And the ones who turned on each other. I remember. It was a terrible thing to see.”

Ipos looks at me.

“Lucifer saved us. The first one. Like you, he had us work building Pandemonium. It took our minds off those . . . other possibilities.”

Neither of them looks at each other or at me. Their eyes are glazed in an ex-soldier’s thousand-yard stare.

I never thought of Hellions this way. They always seemed so full of Fuck You spirit when it came to the war in Heaven. It never occurred to me that being thrown here was as terrible for them as it was for me. When Heaven started shipping in damned souls, it must have been a nice distraction, but only for a while. Guarding passive, broken ghosts can’t be that exciting. And maybe they reminded the fallen angels too much of themselves. The damned minding the damned. If Hellions hadn’t tortured me for all those years, I might even feel sorry for them. But they did, so I don’t.

I take a picture from my pocket and hand it to Merihim.

“While we’re on the subject of lousy deaths, this is a girl from L.A. She had dyed green hair and worked at a donut shop on Hollywood Boulevard. She was murdered by two Kissi sometime between last Christmas and New Year’s. I don’t know if she’s down here, but if she is, can one of you find her?”

Merihim hands the photo to Ipos. He wipes the blood from his hands before taking it. “There can’t be that many pretty mortals killed by monsters in donut shops at Christmas. If she’s here, we’ll find her.”

“When you do, get her a job. Something safe. Away from the craziness. I’d do it myself but being near me is what got her in trouble in the first place.”

Ipos puts the photo in the breast pocket of his work overalls.

“She’s a friend of yours?”

I shake my head.

“I don’t even know her name.”

On the screen I watch myself unwrapping the soldier’s body.

Merihim cocks his head.

“I can’t help but be curious: you want us to find a complete stranger to ease the burden of her damnation but you’ve never once asked about your mother or father.”

“I don’t have to. Believe it or not, I’m capable of doing a few things on my own. They’re not here. It turns out being drunk and miserable are only venial sins after all. Lucky them.”

Ipos says, “Didn’t your father try to shoot you? Shouldn’t he be here with us?”

“I suppose by Heaven’s standards, killing an Abomination isn’t the same as killing a regular human,” says Merihim.

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

I look at the screen, not really watching it.

I say, “I think we’re done here for now. Don’t you?”

As they head for the fake bookcase, Merihim says, “Yesterday I said that I’d bring you a protective potion. That will have to wait until I can check that they’re not bogus.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m not sitting around waiting to get my brain cut open. I’m going to do something.”

“What exactly?”

“I have no idea. Something, you know, subtle.”

Merihim says, “Like when you burned Eden? I only ask because I’m still trying to gauge your definition of ‘subtle.’ ”