The Kill Society (Sandman Slim 9)

“So, you’re an angel.”

“That’s how I got the wings.”

Wanuri hooks a thumb at me.

“You knew him from before. Back on Earth.”

“We used to sleep in the same bed. Getting to know him was inevitable.”

“Your boyfriend? You’re a brave woman. Fifty times a day some of us have plotted his tragic demise.”

“Trust me, I know how you feel.”

I look at them both.

“You know I’m standing right here, right?”

Wanuri says, “I suppose if an old love comes all the way to Hell to fight for someone, that person must have some redeeming qualities.”

“No I don’t.”

“Yes he does. He just can’t control what comes out of his mouth,” says Alice.

“But he really tried to open Hell for us?”

“He really did.”

“All right,” Wanuri says. “I hereby declare you not entirely useless.”

“Does that mean you’re not going to shoot me in the back?”

“We’ll see. Can’t speak for Johnny, though. He’s mean when he gets like this.”

“I got that impression.”

“Take care, Mr. and Mrs. Pitts,” says Wanuri, heading back to center camp.

Before I can say anything, Alice pulls me down to sit on the steps of the motor home.

“I’m sorry you’re really dead,” she says.

“Me too. Now I know what all these poor saps feel like. When I was alive and in Hell, I always thought I’d find a way home. Later, when I had the Room of Thirteen Doors, I didn’t think about real damnation much at all. Was Heaven hard, too?”

“At first. I missed you. I missed our friends. I missed burritos and sashimi. But I got used to it. There’s a lot to do and a lot of very interesting, very nice people.”

“It sounds horrible.”

“It really isn’t. How’s that girl of yours? Candy?”

“Candy. I don’t know how she is. I wasn’t exactly rational when you were killed and I wasn’t even there. Candy saw me get murdered, so I have a feeling she’s not in good shape.”

“I’m so sorry.”

“She killed the guy who stuck me, though. I keep hoping I run into him down here. That would be fun.”

“See? That’s exactly the kind of thinking that gets you in trouble. Focus. One war at a time. You have forever to find him. Or forgive him. That’s an option, too, you know.”

“If you’re recruiting for Heaven, I’ll pass. Tell me about your wings.”