Poles Apart

“I don’t think I will,” I admitted.

I pushed up and forced myself to get off his lap and onto the curb. I opened my mouth to thank him for the lift and say goodnight, but he swung his leg off the bike, too. My heart leapt into my throat. Was he assuming he was going to spend the night? I couldn’t let him do that. He’d see Sasha, and although he wouldn’t know she was his, he would still know I had a daughter.

“I’ll walk you up,” he said, shrugging and slipping an arm around my waist, bringing my body closer to his.

I glanced back at his bike and chewed on my lip. He really shouldn’t leave that there; the shininess to it practically screamed ‘steal me’. By the time he got back to it after walking me up the seven flights of stairs, all that would be left would be the tyre marks on the road.

“Carson, don’t walk me up. Seriously, I’m fine from here. Thanks for the lift, but you really can’t leave your bike outside my flat.” I winced as I admitted how bad this area was.

He laughed and shrugged dismissively. “It’s insured. Come on.” He guided me to start walking again, and I felt my heart sink. My block of flats was awful, and the shame of bringing him here made my face burn.

When we got up to my door, I smiled apologetically. He must think I’m such a dirty hoe right now – a dirty scrubber who works in a strip club and lives in a hell-hole.

“Want to come in for coffee?” I asked, praying he would say no.

He smiled and nodded, looking a little eager about it. I guess, deep down, I was a little eager, too. If I got him in my flat then maybe he’d ease a little of this sexual frustration I was feeling inside. We’d just have to be really quiet and either do it in the lounge or bathroom so we didn’t wake Rory and Sasha.

“I’d love a coffee, actually, unless you don’t want me to. You must want to get more sleep,” he replied, his tone sympathetic.

I waved my hand dismissively and opened the door. Heading inside and motioning for him to come in, I silently hoped Rory hadn’t made too much mess while I was at work.

Carson followed me into the kitchen and I tried not to pay attention to the look on his face, which plainly said he thought my place was small and crappy. I admit that, yes, it was basic, but it was all I could afford, and I kept it immaculately clean, so that was all that mattered.

He sat at my kitchen table while I made coffee. I couldn’t help but make a direct contrast to him sitting there all beautiful and handsome, but yet his arms were folded on top of my cheap second-hand table, while he sat on a chair that creaked when he moved. He looked slightly odd being in my decrepit old kitchen wearing a Gucci shirt.

Just as the kettle boiled, Rory walked in, wearing only boxer shorts. “Hey. You’re a little early,” he mused sheepishly. The table was behind him so he probably hadn’t noticed Carson sitting there; if he did then he hadn’t reacted to him in any way.

I raised one eyebrow at Rory. I was a little earlier than usual. I’d left about five minutes earlier and the trip was only five minutes instead of fifteen. He probably thought he would have time to sneak to bed and pretend like he’d been there for hours before I got home. “Thought you’d get away with staying up, did ya? I bet you thought that as long as you were in bed by half-two I wouldn’t know any different, right?” I teased with mock anger as I slapped the back of his head.

He winced and rubbed the back of his head. “Ouch! I was watching a film!” he whined.

“What part of ‘don’t wait up for me’ don’t you understand, Rory?” I asked, rolling my eyes.

He shrugged dismissively. Most of the time, he waited up to make sure I got home safe from work, even though I always told him not to. “Why are you making two coffees? I don’t want one,” he stated, frowning at the two mugs on the side.

I smiled and looked back to Carson who, at this point, just looked a little confused as he took in a half-naked Rory standing in my kitchen. “A friend gave me a lift home.” I shrugged. Rory turned and jumped as he noticed another person sitting in our kitchen. “Rory, this is Carson Matthews. Carson, my little brother, Rory.” I waved a hand between the two of them.

Carson smiled and actually looked a little relieved as he nodded in greeting. “Hey. Nice to meet you.”

Rory smiled, his eyes flicking back to me knowingly. He probably knew I liked Carson; no doubt it was obvious when I watched him on TV or talked about him. I shot my brother a little glare, warning him not to say anything. He chuckled quietly and grinned at Carson. “Yeah, it’s good to meet you, too. I’ve seen you on TV and stuff.” He smirked at me and I tried to kill him with my eyes. “Well, I’m going to bed. See you in the morning, Emma.”

I let out a relieved breath because he hadn’t made anything awkward between me and Carson. “Was everything okay tonight?” I asked curiously.

Rory knew what I meant; I was talking about Sasha. “Yep, just like usual.” He kissed the side of my head and practically ran out of the room.

When we were on our own again, Carson laughed. “He’s a little bigger than I thought he would be. When you told me you lived with your little brother, I was actually expecting something little,” he teased, grinning as I pushed the coffee mug toward him.

“Yeah, he took off in the last year. He used to be small for his age.” I sipped my hot coffee, scalding my tongue, but I just needed to drink something because my throat was starting to hurt again. “Want to take these into the other room?”