Cowboy Casanova (Rough Riders 12)

Ben tugged Ainsley upright and took her mouth in a savage kiss. He owned each breath, each exhalation, each tongue tangling thrust. And when he thought his head might explode, he broke his lips free from hers. “That little taste isn’t enough.”

“Ben—”

“God, woman, I’m dyin’ for you, but not until we talk this through. All of it.”

“You and that blasted talking.” She nuzzled his cheek. “Okay. But let’s talk fast. Rielle told me what happened. You should know…I had words with her.”

“What kind of words?”

“Words that made it plain I wouldn’t stand for her hurting you.” Ainsley’s fingers were gently scraping against three days worth of beard growth on his face. “I know you, Ben. Her betrayal of your friendship hurt worse than Gavin buying the land.”

This woman saw so much, she knew him so much better than he’d imagined.

“Been a rough week for you. I cut you loose. You were let down by your brother and your friend.” She paused. “And you resigned from the Rawhide Club.”

“News travels fast. Layla must’ve told you?”

“Told me? No. She confronted me, accused me, and threatened me…so it’d be redundant if I asked why you quit. But I want to know if you’re sure you want to quit?”

Ben turned his head and kissed her palm. “I’m positive.” When she didn’t say anything else, he prompted. “And?”

“And now will you ask me if I’d be here if you hadn’t resigned from the club?”

“No. When you told me that we couldn’t be together because of what I was—it pissed me off. You knew I was a Dom, you knew that I belonged to a club when we met. It chapped my ass you were using that as an excuse to break it off with me—because you were scared of embracing your submissive nature permanently.”

“While that is partially true—”

Ben stopped her protest with his fingers. “But once my anger and pride cleared, I understood it wasn’t me bein’ a Dom that was the issue. Or you not accepting being submissive. It was the Rawhide Club itself. You weren’t passing judgment on it or on people who belong to it. Not on me either. And to some extent, not on yourself.”

Her eyes lit up. “You do understand.”

“Took me a couple days, and a bad night at the club, but I finally got it.”

“A bad night at the club? You went to the club last weekend?” she said sharply.

“Don’t look at me like that, angel. I wasn’t there for a hookup. After everything came to a head with us, the Rawhide has always been my go-to place for support, consolation, acceptance, whatever. Long story short, my cousin Dalton showed up and his accusations brought out some questions I’d not dealt with for quite a while.”

“What kind of questions?”

“Why I needed the club. Why I needed certain aspects of it and not others, which really made me think.”

“Are you okay?” Her eyes narrowed. “What accusations did your cousin make? Because you shouldn’t have to explain who you are to anyone.” She snapped, “Did he threaten to tell your family that you’re a Dom? Is that why you resigned from the club?”

He loved how she jumped to his defense. “He told my brothers. Which got Chase and Gavin here right away.” Ben still couldn’t believe they’d shown up. “We had a talk about that part of my life and they didn’t pass judgment.”

“I’m glad, Ben. I’m really, really glad for you. That’s got to be a huge relief.”

“Dalton promised to keep my…proclivities under his hat. But in some ways his questions were good for me. A big reason I kept going to the Rawhide, aside from my friendships with the guys, is I found acceptance. I’d never had that before.”

“But now?”

“Now?” His eyes searched hers and his heart rate spiked. “You tell me.”

“Tell you what?”

“Why you’re here. What you want from me.”

Ainsley didn’t hold back. “I want it all. More time with you and me together. With you as my Dom. With every part, each facet, all sides of yourself that you want to share with me.”

Everything in him that’d been wound tight…loosened. “I hoped you’d want that. “

“I do. More than anything.”

“I knew I’d have to choose.”

“Choose what?”

“Choose between the club and you.”

She went utterly still.

“And I chose you. I’ve got your acceptance and I don’t need to go anywhere else. I’m not giving anything up by leaving the club, Ainsley, I feel like I’m gaining so much more than I’d ever hoped for.”

“What are you saying?” she whispered, trailing her fingers across the stubble on his jaw.

Ben’s mouth went dry as the words he’d never said to a woman poured from his mouth, from his heart. “I love you.”

“Oh. God. Ben.”

“I feel whole with you. Before I kept the two halves of myself separated. But when I’m with you, I’m a whole man. I’m the man I want to be. I’m the man I was meant to be. You are everything I’ve ever wanted in a woman but thought I’d never find. And here you are.”

She laughed, sniffing against the tears leaking from the corners of her eyes. “I love you. The whole you. The Dom side. The rancher side. The intuitive side. The sweet side. The raunchy side.”

Ben kissed her with a lingering smooch as he tried to slow the thundering of his heart. “I like who I am when I’m with you, angel.”

“Ben.”

“I want to be with you. All of you. I want to pick you up at the bank, take you out for lunch and let everyone know we’re together. I want to support your community events. I want you to come to my family deals as my woman, not my friend. I want to take you dancing, and horseback riding, and then I want to tie you up, turn your ass pink before I f**k you hard.” He traced her jawline. “I want to be with you every damn day. I want this angelic face to be the first thing I see in the morning and the last thing I see at night. If I had my way, I’d move all your stuff over here tonight.”

“But?”

“But I understand that you probably wanna take it slow. You’re still trying to find your place in a new town. In a new job. In a new type of relationship. I’m just as shocked as you are that so much has happened between us and it’s only been a little over a month.”