Bad Boy of Baseball (Player Loves Curves 6)

He looks devastated with hurt darkening his eyes. He’s searching my face as if he’s looking for answers, and I cover his hands with my own. He leans his forehead against mine. “I can’t forget you, Hanna. I’ve fucking tried. I need to forget you. I need to move on. You destroyed me and I hate you for it.”

I gasp and pull away from him, scrambling to get up. I knew he probably hated me. I know he probably blames me for the way he’s been acting. I follow him on the news, and I know that is not the same Carter I knew. And he’s probably right. It’s all my fault.

I go to the door and walk out of it without even looking back. I have so much to say to him, but I can’t. Not now. Right now, I have to pull myself together and somehow make it through the rest of the night.

5

Carter

I jerk awake, sit up in the bed, and look around the empty room. It’s the same room I sleep in every night, but I’m looking at it like it’s brand new. The dream I woke up from was so vivid that I half expected to wake up in my room at my parents’ house, holding Hanna in my arms.

I drop back into the bed, and even though I just woke up, I’m exhausted. I almost wonder if everything that happened last night was just in my imagination. But I can still smell the scent of peaches like it’s been burned into my skin. Staring at the ceiling, I get lost in thought and let my mind wonder back to the night of our high school graduation. I can still remember it, like it happened last night instead of two years ago.

“Can you believe we did it?” Hanna asks me, with her arms around my neck. I’m sitting on my bed in my parents’ house with her on my lap. This should be one of the happiest days of my life. I graduated high school today. I’ll be leaving next week to play professional baseball with the Mavericks, a team I’ve always dreamed of playing for. But I can’t even think about that because I can’t imagine leaving Hanna.

I put my arms around her and hold her against my chest, breathing in her sweet peach scent. “Did you doubt it? I mean you have a 4.0 grade point average. I think they had to graduate you.”

She pinches the skin of my arm. “You had a 3.8, but you know what I mean.”

I can tell she’s trying to be brave, but she’s just as torn up about me leaving. We’ve been together for so long I literally don’t know if I’ll be able to leave her.

She shifts and leans in, pressing her breasts against my chest, her fingers stroking the soft hairs of my neck. “So I’ve been thinking,” she says softly, and already my blood is heating in my veins, going south.

I adjust her on my lap and prepare myself for what I know is coming. “Oh yeah?”

She leans in and kisses me briefly before putting her cheek next to mine and whispering in my ear, “I want you to take my virginity, Carter.”

“Sweet Peach, I don’t…” I start, but she lifts off of me, straddling my lap, looping her legs around me. She’s holding on to me, looking into my eyes, almost begging me to take her. I’ve held back for so long because I don’t want to hurt her… and I know I will.

“I want you, Carter. I know you’re leaving, but I also know that I want forever with you. Give me this. Please? I want you to be my first.” She looks at me with her light blue eyes, and I know I can’t deny her.

But I still tense up at her words. “I want to be your only.”

She rolls her eyes then, like I’m crazy for even questioning that. She climbs off my lap and starts to undress. In the past, I’ve talked her out of this, usually pleasing her with my hand or my tongue. But she wants me, and I’m dying to be inside her too.

She pulls off her clothes, her bra and panties. I look for nervousness in her face, but there isn’t any. I can’t move though. She leaves me breathless. It’s like I’m drowning from how consuming my love for her is. She’s my everything, and I don’t want to screw this up.

She puts her hand on her hip. “Well…?”

I scoot from the bed and fall to my knees in front of her, but she’s not having any of it. She pulls on my shirt, pulling me to my feet, and I stand up, towering over her. She pulls the hem of my shirt over my head, and I raise my hands to help her. “I don’t want your hand. I don’t want your tongue. I want you, Carter. I want to feel you inside me. I can’t explain it, but I need that. I need to feel that with you.”