The Anti-Boyfriend
I had bigger fish to fry tonight. I really wanted to go next door to see if Carys needed anything. Sunny was still crying, and when I heard the Bee Gees playing and realized that hadn’t calmed her down, I decided that was my cue.
My heart raced as I went next door. I’d use returning the binky as my official excuse.
When she opened, I couldn’t believe what I saw. I had expected Carys to look flustered or disheveled after Sunny’s meltdown. Instead, she wore a black sequin dress and looked like a million bucks.
She’s going out?
Carys was out of breath as she stood there, holding a crying Sunny. “What’s up?” she asked.
“Are you heading out?”
Instead of answering my question, she blew air up toward her forehead. “What do you want, Deacon?”
Nice to see you, too.
I held up the pacifier and wiggled it between my fingers. “I wanted to return this. Found it on my floor. I probably should’ve washed it but figured you’d throw it in the dishwasher. Not sure of the proper way to sanitize these things.”
She nodded once. The fact that she was still cold toward me wasn’t a surprise. I knew seeing me with Kendra the other day must have sucked. But the fact of the matter? That was exactly what I was aiming for. I was trying to get over Carys and hoping she’d see things were “back to normal,” back to the way they were before I’d royally fucked up.
Sunny kicked her legs, seeming to want out of Carys’s arms.
I reached out. “May I?”
Carys looked down at Sunny, then back at me, as if accepting my offer wasn’t an easy decision. But eventually, she handed Sunny over.
After a couple of minutes in my arms, Sunny’s wailing had reduced to quiet sniffles.
Bopping her up and down, I asked, “What happened to the Bee Gees? I heard the music earlier. They didn’t help much this time, huh?”
“No. I guess they’ve run their course…like a lot of things.”
Ouch. I pretended that went over my head. “That sucks. We’ll have to find something else.”
A few seconds of awkward silence passed. “Why did you really come over here?” she asked. “I doubt it was to return this dusty binky.”
I looked down at Sunny to gather my thoughts. “I wanted to check in on you, see how you’re doing. It’s been a while.”
“Well, at the moment, not good, Deacon. Because I’m supposed to be attending an important event for work tonight, and Sharon had to cancel.”
Shit. “Why didn’t you call me?” I asked without thinking.
“Do you really not know the answer to that?”
Of course, that was a dumb question. “What time are you supposed to be there?”
“I was supposed to be there fifteen minutes ago.”
I waved my hand. “Go. I’ll watch her.”
She shook her head. “I can’t let you do that.”
“Carys…I know I fucked up our friendship. And I’m sorry. But I still care about you. And I don’t want you to miss this thing if it’s important. So maybe just take me up on my offer so you don’t have to piss off your boss. Then you can process it later. We’ll talk when you get back.” When she didn’t say anything, I pushed. “You need that job. Now’s not the time for pride.”
She sighed. “I don’t know…”
“Look how calm Sunny is right now. It’ll be fine. We’ll be fine.”
We’ll be fine.
Sunny and me? Yes.
You and me? Not so sure.
Blinking several times, she finally conceded. “Okay.”
“Good,” I said. “Now go, so you don’t miss too much.”
Carys rushed around in search of her things, grabbing her purse and a quick glass of water. She wore high, red-bottomed heels. Fuck, her legs looked good in those shoes. My mouth watered as I admired the curve of her little, round ass in that dress. Then jealousy set in at the thought of men ogling her tonight.
Kissing Sunny on the head, she said, “Be a good girl.”
I took a deep breath of her scent for the few seconds she was close.
She finally looked up at me. “I won’t be back too late.”
“Take as long as you need.”
Another whiff of her perfume hit me as she blew out the door.
After she was gone, I looked down at Sunny.
“We got this, right? No surprises tonight.” I put my forehead against hers. “And you know what that means.”
When she smiled, it reminded me how much I’d missed her pure, non-judgmental sweetness. No one ever looked at me like Sunny Kincaid did. And I didn’t deserve a shred of it. I wished I could warn her not to get too attached to the man next door. I’d only end up disappointing her, like I had so many other people who’d trusted me.
Wandering the room with her in my arms, I spoke in a low voice. “Do you ever wonder who the hell I am? I’m not even sure I formally introduced myself, Sunny. You probably just look at me as the weird, big guy who comes over sometimes and holds you.” I smiled. “Anyway…I’m Deacon. Can you say Deacon?” I pointed to my chest. “Deacon.”