The Anti-Boyfriend

“And that I’d be coaching soccer. Not exactly playing the field in the same way anymore.” I chuckled and reached for her hand. “But you know, it all makes sense now.”

“What does?”

“Everything had to happen the way it did. Could you imagine if I’d gone on to play for the NFL? I would’ve never met you. I probably would’ve gotten myself into some kind of messed-up shit. I guarantee you I wouldn’t be this content. All those years I thought losing that career was the worst thing that ever happened to me. But my second act? This? I’d take it any day over that other life.”

Carys squeezed my hand. “When you said that, you reminded me of something. Did I ever tell you how I came up with Sunny’s name?”

“No.”

“I was all alone in the hospital after I had her. The entire pregnancy had been scary with so many unknowns, and on top of that, I’d just learned my baby had Down’s. Fear had nearly crippled me.” She stared out the window a moment. “The day before, I’d given birth to her in a blur with a ton of drugs. After everything I’d been through, for the first time, it was just me and Sunny. She looked up at me, probably wondering where the hell she was. I looked out the hospital room window and saw the sun coming up. I just kept looking at that sunrise over the city and back at her little face. She’d just been through the hell of birth, yet she was so peaceful. She was alive and content in my arms. And I realized I wasn’t alone at all anymore. I had everything I needed. Sunny. The light that emerges from darkness.

“That’s beautiful,” I said, feeling a lump in my throat. “I’ve always loved her name. But now I love it even more.”

In the rearview mirror, I glanced back at Sunny, whose ice cream cone was now melted all over her face.

The light that emerges from darkness. “You know how you felt when you saw the sun that day, Carys? Pretty sure that’s exactly what I felt the first time I looked into your eyes.”