He held me tight as I rode him faster and faster. I could tell he was close to coming, but I held on a bit longer. I had crushed on him ever since I was younger, so I wanted to enjoy every moment that I could with him. Alex came first. I could feel him squirt inside of me. His arms started to go limp, but I managed to balance myself as I rode him until I came a few minutes later.
Afterward, we readjusted our bathing suits and went back to sitting side by side in the hot tub.
“To think, that’s what we missed out on all these years,” Alex joked. We both laughed a little.
After a few moments of silence, I said, “Hey, Alex. Would you mind if we talked more about our ideas? I came up with some great ones after our walk today that I’m really excited to share with you.”
He looked at me eagerly and replied, “Yeah, that would be great!” But before I even got a chance to speak, Alex was talking about his writing again. “Did I tell you that I already started writing my book? I used that idea of mine that you said you liked so much yesterday. I think I already have a whole chapter complete. I plan on making this book longer than my previous ones. I really want to take my time to develop the characters and add as many details as possible. I think that will make the readers enjoy the book more. What do you think?” he asked.
“Um, yeah. That sounds great! A more detailed book will definitely get the readers’ attention. In fact…” I tried to continue talking, but he cut me off right there.
“That’s what I thought. This is going to be the first book that I have written in a long time, so I want it to be my best,” Alex replied proudly.
I just sat there silently, knowing I wouldn’t get a chance to talk.
Alex looked at the clock on the wall. “Oh, this place is going to close. We should get to our rooms. Should we continue talking during our group tomorrow?” he asked.
“Um yeah. That’s fine,” I replied as I tried to keep my feelings to myself.
We both got out of the hot tub and grabbed our towels. Before we walked out of the area, Alex grabbed me and pulled me in for a quick kiss.
“Thank you for everything. I haven’t felt this good about my writing in years,” he said softly.
All I could manage to give him was a small smile. Alex didn’t notice since he was too caught up in his own thoughts. He gave me a tight hug before he walked off.
I made it up to my room alone. Once inside, I threw my towel and bathing suit in with my dirty clothes and changed into my dry sweats, then I threw myself on the bed. I stared at the ceiling feeling a little frustrated, although I didn’t mean to feel that way. I was glad Alex was happy and making progress with his writing, but what about mine? Lately, all we had done was talk about his work. I was starting to feel left out. The whole reason we had made this agreement was so that we could write together. I needed help with my career. I knew I wasn’t imagining how one-sided this relationship was starting to feel.
Turning over, I tried to get some sleep. This was too much to think about right now. Besides, I needed to be well-rested for tomorrow because I knew Alex would bombard me with more details about his book.
Chapter Seven – Hazel
The brain-storming session the following morning was very brief. A lot of the other writers in the group talked aloud or shared ideas, but Alex and I remained quiet. I could tell his thoughts were elsewhere, and I didn’t know how to feel about that since I was still kind of upset from the night before. I didn’t make any effort at conversation, not that he would have noticed.
Once the group had finished, Alex disappeared upstairs to work on the next chapter in his book. He left without so much as a goodbye. I groaned in frustration at that, finding it increasingly difficult to hold in my emotions about the situation. I needed to figure out how to get my mind off Alex and back on my writing. I had made no progress since going on this retreat.
After walking across the conference room, I poured myself a complimentary cup of coffee. As I sipped, I looked around the room at the few people from our group that remained. Jay sat in a corner by himself. I remembered how nice he had been on the first day of the group. It had been so easy to talk to him since he had been very helpful and enthusiastic about my ideas.