That Night in Texas
He liked this life with them in it.
But could he have it? Did he deserve it? He was, he reluctantly admitted, a controlling bastard. He liked calling the shots; of course, he did. He’d been a child without guidance, too much freedom and not enough discipline. He had run wild and free, with no sense of responsibility and no concept of accountability. Eventually he’d taken a path away from crime, but a part of him always thought that no matter how much money he made and how much he gave away to charity—anonymously, of course—he was stained by his past actions.
His daughter was pure goodness and Vivi was pure class. How could he possibly think he was good enough to be with them on even a semipermanent basis?
It would be so easy to lie to himself. To tell himself that he had a right to happiness, that he wasn’t the same person. But he knew he was, deep inside. He’d translated his ability of reading people to scanning the business world with an eagle eye, looking for an opportunity to pounce. He was still the same person—hard, driven, wily and cunning. Except now he just operated in a field that was legal. He was still the boy with a chip on his shoulder, constantly wanting and needing more. He’d never been satisfied with much for long, always looking for something new, something he’d never had.
What if, in time, Vivi and Clem weren’t enough, what if he wanted more? What then?
Cam was jerked out of his thoughts by Vivi’s hand on his shoulder. He looked up into her lovely face and his heart bounced off his chest.
“I’ll take Clem up to bed.”
He nodded and Vivi scooped Clem up, easily holding her in her arms. Cam glanced at his watch, saw that it was getting late and asked if she was going to come back down.
Vivi shook her head. “You spend some time with Ryder.” She turned to smile at the guest. “It was so nice to meet you, Ryder.”
Ryder and Cam stood up, and Ryder’s smile was easy. “I look forward to eating at your restaurant again soon, Vivi. I miss your ribs.”
“That’s kind of you to say.” Vivi’s smile held sadness and Cam reminded himself that he had to do something to convince her to allow him to bankroll the restaurant’s resurrection. He’d find a way past her independence and stubbornness. Her dream deserved that.
“Please tell me that’s she’s going back to work,” Ryder said once Vivi had left the room.
Ryder was so damn sharp, immediately picking up that something was off about Vivi’s response. He trusted Ryder and told him the truth. “Joe was underinsured and wants to retire. Vivi isn’t able to raise the cash needed to reopen.”
Ryder sat down and placed his ankle on his knee, his whiskey glass nearly empty. He shook his head when Cam offered him more. “So, get a group of investors together and fund the renovation,” Ryder said, frowning. “You’ve it done a hundred times before.”
Like he hadn’t considered that idea a thousand times. “She’s won’t let me. I’ve never come across anyone more independent or stubborn than Vivi Donner.”
Ryder chuckled. “She doesn’t want your money?”
“Neither my money nor my help,” Cam admitted.
“That’s hilarious.”
It really wasn’t. Cam poured himself another whiskey and frowned at his friend’s amusement. “I want to give her what she needs but she won’t take a damn thing,” he grumbled.
Ryder dropped his foot, leaned forward and handed Cam a hard look. “Are you sure that money is what she most needs from you?”
Cam met his eyes. “Probably not, but I can’t give her anything else, Ryder. She needs a good man, a man with no baggage, someone who isn’t...me.”
“Camden,” Ryder sighed his name. “Please tell me this isn’t about that horse crap Emma spouted so long ago.”
Emma had just verbalized what Cam knew to be the truth. “I can’t be the husband and father they need. I’m not—” He hesitated, unable to voice his deepest fear. He wasn’t good enough for them.
“Jesus, Cam.” Ryder pushed his hand through his thick hair. “Dammit, boy, when are you going to knock that chip off your shoulder? You’re not that kid you were, the person you were. People can change, Camden.”