The Desert Lord's Bride (Throne of Judar 2)

One experience. So she’d been as inexperienced as he’d felt. Her first real intimacies, her first pleasures, her first abandon had been in his arms.

But the elation of this confirmation was dampened by everything else. The expanding knowledge of how much his initial preconceptions-no matter that they’d been backed up by photographic evidence-had caused him to misjudge her. They’d polluted his thoughts and feelings, kept him resisting logic and the evidence of his own senses and intruded upon the precious moments with her, moments he hadn’t fully appreciated, believing what he had about her. And now this. And he had to know the rest, everything. Struggling with a dozen reactions, he said, “Tell me about this experience that led you to believe such a ludicrous thing about yourself.”

She looked as if she’d rather dig a hole and hide.

Just as he was about to tell her she shouldn’t recount it if it upset her at all, she squared her shoulders, gave him such an adorable look of embarrassment and determination.

“I was nineteen and I was still trying to cope with losing Dad, with being the strong one for my mother’s sake. Dan was one of Dad’s executives and he kept working on convincing me that I needed someone, that that someone was him. His research of me was so thorough he knew what to do, what to say, to project the image of a soulmate for the embarrassingly green girl I was. But then, as a shrewd businessman, he would have sunk that much time and effort into far less than the half-billion-dollar deal I still was at the time. He was ready to do anything to land me. Then he did, and it was-” she winced, the perfection of her lightly tanned skin turning coppery with embarrassment “-horrible. It wasn’t even painful, for he was-uh…” She put two fingers about four inches apart, turning positively red. “Anyway, it was just awkward and gross. And he told me it was OK, that some women aren’t capable of enjoying sex, but he would keep trying to-to…”

“Cure you?” he spat.

She winced at his sharpness, nodded. “Something like that. Seemed he counted on me being so ashamed of my shortcomings, I would let him steer me whichever way he wanted. But you know me. I’m incapable of hiding what I feel. So I said, if I couldn’t enjoy it, didn’t want it, why bother? He tried to humor me for a long time, but his act started to crack. Seemed that when all the work he’d done wasn’t paying off, his endurance started to give. Then one day I blurted out, why not just be friends? And he erupted. Just like a volcano. Kept spewing for an hour, honest. Who would want to be my friend? He’d only endured my inexperience and my odious character for the money, which he thought he deserved, not a brainless idiot like me. I was amazed. I’d aggravated him to the point where he threw away half a billion dollars rather than put up with me. Then, when said money was lost, he even called me, gloating over his lucky escape and over the fact that I was now not only a cold bitch but a penniless one, too.”

Shehab glowered at his hands, feeling his every nerve charging up with murderous intent.

But was he any better than this man? Hadn’t he done the same to her? Manipulated her to an end unconnected with her? As she’d felt from day one?

No. His cause was just. And he’d started his own manipulation under false impressions about her, the worst. And he’d pleasured her, would die before he hurt her in any way. While that man, who’d deceived her, scarred her for life…

He rose, stood on the bed, looked down on her. “I’ll find that scum. Then I’ll send him on a one-way trip to hell.”

She blinked in alarm, then gave a nervous giggle. “Oh, Shehab, he’s not worth one drop of this magnificent machismo. Save it all for me.”

“You’re not buying him mercy like you did the paparazzi,” he bellowed. “The man who made you think being hounded by them was preferable to being exposed to his species, the man who convinced you you had something lacking, when you only have extra endowments, the least of which was the sense to feel repulsed by his dirty soul’s touch, when there’s no woman who has more sensitivity, or is more capable of being ignited and pleasured than you. He robbed you of your innocence when he didn’t even want it, when he reviled that incomparable gift. And he’ll pay, slowly, for all his crimes.”

She gave a huge sob, launched herself at his legs, hugged them. “Oh, Shehab, if you want to avenge me, you just did. More fully and fantastically than you can ever know. Just forget him, or you’ll make me scared to tell you anything from now on.”

He looked down on her, grappling with aggression, with the raging emotions at seeing her like this, at his feet, the cover pooling on her thighs and exposing the sweep of her graceful back and flared hips in a pose out of his deepest erotic fantasies. He felt his turmoil leveling as his aching eyes glided over the luxurious waterfall of her sun-kissed hair cascading between his rigid thighs, her lips almost buried in his erection.

He took all he could then snapped, sank to his knees before her, hauled her to him, mingled her with his limbs and lips.

He came up from the endless kiss, looked down at her as she lay in his arms, her eyes drugged, her trembling hands pushing his abaya off, exposing him to her hunger.

She started talking again as she pushed him to his back, to start the exploration she’d claimed a right to, one of the events he now lived for. “But this guy was right about one thing. I did experiment with physical intimacy after him…” He stiffened, and she soothed him. “I didn’t go beyond kisses, with good-looking men I found nice enough, agendas and all. I’d decided to go in with my eyes open and have fun. I thought if the kisses went well, I’d go further.” He started to growl and she dipped her tongue into his navel. “I hated the first’s scent and taste. The second’s voice, his breathing, the noises he made in his throat made me want to slap him. With the third, when I found myself thinking when I can get this over with so I can go back to that donut I was eating, I knew Dan was right about me being unable to enjoy physical intimacy.” He came off the bed when she buried her face in his erection, inhaled him, moaning long in enjoyment. Then she raised her head and looked him straight in the eyes. And her eyes. Ya Ullah, her eyes.

This was Farah, letting him see into the very depths of her heart and soul. Then she told him.

“But I realize now I can’t feel physical passion without an emotional one. And that’s why you’ll always be the only one to ignite and pleasure me. Because I love you.”