Falling From Disgrace

Adrianna stayed on her knees at his feet and she saw his face go pale. “Fuck,” Jack gasped and then ran a shaky hand through his hair. Adrianna scrambled from the floor to sit beside him on the bed and took his hand.

“What happened?” Jack bit out and Adrianna wished she could hear the other end of the conversation. Worried for her boyfriend, she just waited patiently while he spoke to his sister.

“No...I know, Gillian...Shit...Yeah, I’ll take care of it...Let me figure some things out and I’ll call you back in a bit...Okay....Bye.”

Jack ended the call and sat staring at the floor. He removed his hand from Adrianna’s and rested his elbows on his knees, rubbing his face.

“My dad died.”

“Oh, Jack,” Adrianna cried. She reached a hand out to smooth over his hair, hoping to bring him some comfort. “I’m so sorry. What happened?”

Without looking at her he answered, “No one had heard from him for over a week so one of his friends went by the house to check on him. He found him on the kitchen floor. He had probably been there a few days.”

Adrianna choked back the bile that had risen in her throat and blinked back tears. Her heart was breaking for Jack. “That’s horrible,” she whispered. “What can I do?”

Jack closed his eyes and covered his face with his hands. He had known this day would come yet he didn’t feel prepared for it at all. Before his emotions could get the best of him he needed to get away from Adrianna. He didn’t want her to see him fall apart.

Jack cleared his throat and steeled his nerves. “Nothing,” he stated, rising from the bed and searching for his shirt. “I need to get home, call Kenny, see if he can run the bar for the next few days.”

Adrianna nodded and watched as he pulled his shirt over his head. She felt useless, not knowing what to do or say. “Do you want me to come back to your apartment with you?”

“It’s okay, just stay here,” Jack told her. “I’ll call you later.”

He leaned down and gave Adrianna a quick kiss and then hurried out of her apartment.

Jack literally felt as if he were having a heart attack. Never in his life had his chest felt so weighted down and he struggled to breathe from it. Cursing himself for not driving his car to Adrianna’s, he flagged down a taxi, needing to get home as quickly as possible. When he finally made it back to his apartment, he went straight to his whiskey, taking three long pulls right from the bottle of Johnnie Walker Black. Inhaling deeply through his nose, he waited for the liquor to take its calming effects.

Fuck, he had no idea hearing about his father would hit him like this. Even growing up, Jack was never close to Jonathan Senior who was always disappointed in his son for being such a troublemaker at school. Five years ago when he refused Jack’s pleas to get help and they got into a tremendous argument, Jack had sworn he wasn’t going to waste his time with his old man any longer, knowing full well that he was slowly killing himself. He was right, but now instead of feeling relieved like he thought he would all he felt was pain and guilt. He should have pushed more, should have insisted his father get help, maybe even physically dragged him to a doctor. But he didn’t. Instead he cut him out of his life and let him die alone.

“Fuck!” Jack screamed at the top of his lungs, gripping the edges of his kitchen countertop so tightly his knuckles turned white. He brought his head down, bending at the waist and screamed again at the floor below him until his lungs burned. He pushed himself away from the counter, grabbed the bottle of whiskey and then drank what was left of it before passing out on his sofa.

Adrianna was wrought with anguish. After hours had gone by the night before and she didn’t hear from Jack she tried calling him, only to reach his voicemail. She spent the night tossing and turning, worrying for him and feeling a little hurt. Jack had taken care of her when she was at her worst and now that he was the one needing, he ran from her. When she woke Saturday morning after only a few hours of sleep, she tried Jack’s phone once again to no avail. After fretting over what to do, she decided to hell with it; she would go to his apartment. She threw on a pair of jeans and a white t-shirt and scurried out the door to hail a cab.