The Governess Club: Sara

“I wasn’t th-thinking,” she replied.

His brows rose. “That much is clear.”

“I didn’t know I was coming here,” she continued, her teeth no longer chattering. “Not at first. I just had to leave the house because I needed to think. Walking helps me think. And I ended up here.”

Nathan was confused. “Why would thinking have you end up here? You don’t like me.”

She shook her head. “I never said that. I said you were unpleasant, but that doesn’t mean I don’t like you.”

“Allow me to rephrase. Why would you come here when you find me unpleasant?”

She took another drink of the hot toddy. “Because I have made a decision.”

“Indeed?”

She nodded. “Yes. I have made the decision that I want an adventure and for the first time in my life I am going to take what I want. You’re going to be my adventure, Mr. Grant. Teach me what you meant by saying you wanted to do more to me. I want to know and you’re going to help me.”

CHAPTER FOURTEEN

* * *

He looked like he had swallowed his tongue. That was not encouraging.

Sara dropped her eyes and stared at the hot toddy he had shoved into her hands. She lifted the mug to her lips and took another drink.

She couldn’t even say for certain how she had arrived at this decision; her thoughts had been rushing through her mind so fast and had been so overwhelming that they had propelled her off the drawing room sofa and into the rain. She walked for what seemed to be hours, but had suspicions it had been considerably shorter than that. She could pinpoint one moment of pristine clarity, one thought that made everything else make sense so abruptly that she had halted in mid-step.

Mr. Grant can help me.

That had settled it. Next thing she knew, Windent Hall was before her. When there had been no answer to her knocking on the door, she had pushed it open herself and made her way to the library, the only room she knew in the place.

Seeing him facing the fire, lost in thought—rightness had reverberated in her bones.

But now she was uncertain, her confidence fleeing with his silence. And his swallowed tongue look.

“Hm.” His grunt broke the silence and Sara lifted her eyes with trepidation, wondering exactly what expression she would see on his face now. His narrowed eyes were staring at her but while they used to cause her skin to chill, now all she could feel was the radiating heat.

Mr. Grant spoke. “I must ask you to clarify. What exactly are you are seeking my help for?” His voice was low and raspy.

“Um—” Sara hesitated.

“Just say it, Miss Collins,” he bit out. “If you could walk in here the way you did, you can bloody well say it.”

“I want your tongue in my mouth,” she blurted, feeling her face catch on fire. “I want to know what you meant when you said you want to do more to me.”

He took an audible breath, his eyes narrowing even more, though one would think it was impossible. He spun on his heel and took the short steps to the side table and filled one of the mugs with an amber liquid—brandy, she remembered, was what he preferred. He tilted his head back and drained the mug before filling it again.

“So,” he said, still facing away from her. “The innocent has come seeking corruption and I am to be the corrupter.”

His voice was tight, with anger she thought. “I did not think of it in quite that way,” she replied.

He turned to face her. “No? Tell me, how do you think of it then?”

She swallowed and lifted her chin. “As an adventure.”

His bark of laughter made her jump. “An adventure? Do you fully comprehend what you are asking me to do?”

“I am certain Mr. Frobisher did not fully comprehend what his journeys would entail, but that did not stop him from going.”

Mr. Grant shook his head with incredulity and walked toward her. He did not have the aid of his cane and his limp was pronounced. “You, Miss Collins, are asking me to educate you as a husband educates his wife. As I currently have no intention to marry, you are asking me to ruin you.”

She swallowed again. “Oh,” she said, her voice small. She glanced down at the now cold toddy.