When still she didn’t say anything, I said, “This week I took all the tests required to get me into the Navy. I made a ninety-nine on my ASVAB. They said I could have the pick of anything that I wanted to do. But I don’t want to do just anything. I want to be a Navy SEAL.”
Her eyes rounded in horror.
“No.”
“Yes.” I nodded.
“You’re…” She paused. “You’re going to what?”
I looked at the ceiling and stared.
“I’m going to join the Navy,” I said softly. “I’m not going to take the scholarship.”
Her mouth fell open, and she stared at me in surprise.
“You’re… what?” she said again, unable to comprehend just what, exactly, I was saying.
“I’m going to join the Navy,” I repeated. “I’ve already tested. The moment that I graduate in December, I’m shipping out.”
Her mouth fell open.
“You graduate in December?” she all but screeched.
I winced. “Yes.”
“Since when?” she gasped.
“Since always.” I shrugged. “I would’ve been able to graduate last year but I couldn’t fit in all of my electives in one year.”
She stared at me with shock written all over her face.
“You’re telling me you have ten more weeks? Does this mean you’ll miss New Year’s Eve?” she asked, sounding disconnected from the conversation now.
I winced.
“Actually.” I paused. “I’ll miss Christmas. I’ll ship out on the nineteenth, the day after we get out of school.”
“That’s not even graduation yet, Banner. You won’t even walk across the stage,” she said dully.
I wouldn’t.
I knew that.
My parents knew that.
And now Perry knew that.
But, it was either that or wait until the end of February. And if I did that, it’d throw a lot of other things off, too.
And I didn’t want to wait.
I wanted to do it now. I… was selfish.
I really did want the best of both of my worlds.
“I want to do this, Perry. I want to go into the Navy. I want to become a Navy SEAL. I want to do all the things that I’ve always wanted to do. And you came in and made me question that. But in the end, I don’t think you’ll like it if I just gave up on my dream. I love you, and I know that you love me. I don’t want this to end, Perry. I can see the war going on in your eyes. You don’t want me to go, but I have to go. I’m going to go. The question is, are you going to be with me when I do.”
***
Perry
A whole bunch of words started to sift through my head, and I blinked, unable to comprehend just what exactly he was saying.
“So if you’re okay with that,” he said softly. “Then I’m okay with taking this relationship further.”
This relationship further.
“What do you mean?” I asked. “Further?”
How much further could you go? We’d already gone pretty far.
“When I’m through with basic, I’ll attend a program called BUD/S Prep. I’ll stay where I’m at for another six to eight weeks. From there I’ll attend another training program until the next INDOC class forms.”
He rattled on and on, but all I kept hearing was the five to six weeks here, four weeks there, six months over there, three weeks here, six more months after that three weeks.
Over and over it went until I held up my hand to stop him.
“How long?” I asked. “How long altogether?”
He frowned. “A year and a half to two years.”
I closed my eyes. “Where does that leave me? Am I just supposed to wait for a year and a half?”
His face closed off.
“I love you.”
His words made my heart pound.
“I love you, too,” I said as I gathered myself up off his bed and went to the side where I’d kicked off my shoes earlier. “And after that? Where do I go? What do I do? Do I go down to wherever you get stationed? Am I even allowed to? Will I see you in that year and a half? Talk to you?”
He softened. “Of course, you will.”
“But…” I closed my eyes as I tried to think about everything that he’d just said. Tried to process the un-processable. “I... I need to go.”
“What about our friends?” he asked. “They are coming over here.”
I looked over at him and shrugged. “I’ll call them. At least the girls. Tell them change of plans. They’re not supposed to be over here for another hour anyway.”
He frowned. “I don’t want to leave it like this.”
I got pissed then.
“Then you shouldn’t have started it like this,” I snapped. “You knew what you were doing. It’s like you’ve done all of this behind my back. You could’ve just said something, you know.”
He swallowed.
“That’s right,” he said. “I could have. But I didn’t. Because I knew this is how you would react.”
With that parting comment, he walked out of his room, leaving me staring at the doorway where he’d disappeared.