Mess Me Up (Bear Bottom Guardians MC 1)

She had another place to live now while she settled her grandmother’s estate, and because of that, she had a house available to rent—or sublet, since she’d signed a one-year lease on it.

“Do you want to talk about whatever it is that brought you here?” Telly asked softly. “I know that you’re not here because you want to be.”

Here was Hostel, Texas.

And no, I certainly wasn’t here because I wanted to be.

“I’m not ready yet,” I admitted. “And I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready.”

I didn’t place my hand on my stomach, a reflex now. Every fiber of my being screamed at me to do that constantly now. A protective measure, maybe?

I also didn’t meet Telly’s eyes.

Instead, I changed the subject.

“So, you and Finley Hail, huh?” I said softly. “How did that happen?”

She shook her head, her eyes smiling.

“I know you’re changing the subject.” She rolled her eyes. “And Finley Hail and I haven’t happened…I’m just living in his house as a live-in nanny for his young daughter. When he’s not here, anyway. When he is, I will have an apartment over the garage so I can still be available to watch her. Plus, he’s only here a short while. He’s going back to Alabama or something as soon as he straightens out his baby-mama drama.”

She may not have actually done anything with Finley Hail yet, but she would.

He’d been the one to drop her off with his young daughter in the front seat, and the entire time his eyes had stayed on her.

He’d flicked his eyes to me once, and once only, and that was it.

“Tell me.” I gestured to the front steps. “What does Finley Hail do that keeps him away from home?”

For a woman that ‘didn’t like him like that’ she sure had a lot of good things to say about the man.

I also didn’t miss the way her eyes lit up each and every time she spoke about him.

But like recognized like.

Only a love-sick fool could spot another love-sick fool.Chapter 21Be a unicorn, not a twatapotamus.

-Coffee Cup

Rome

I felt like something had been ripped straight out of my chest for the second time in my life.

What gave me meaning two days ago was no longer possible today, and I felt like I was drowning.

It was somehow worse, knowing that the person that I needed more than air was still alive, but just gone from my life.

It was like I had cement shoes on my feet, and I was at the bottom of the lake. I could see the surface, but I couldn’t reach it.

I followed her.

The moment I knew that she was safe, I went to my best friend and ordered him to take care of her.

Now, a month later, I was still no closer to finding my answers.

I sat on my couch, staring at the tank Blitz was lazily chewing away at a piece of lettuce in, wondering what in the hell I was going to do.

I knew I couldn’t keep living like this.

I also knew that I hadn’t—wouldn’t—stop loving her.

Which led me to thinking about things and realizing that I needed some perspective.

I picked up my gym bag and walked out the door, slamming it closed behind me without bothering to lock it.

The only thing that I cared about was an hour and a half away, hiding.

Then again, wasn’t that what I was doing, too?

My phone rang. “I’m on my way, fucker.”

“You better not be unless you’re seriously going to do something about it,” Tyler growled.

I frowned, surprised to even be hearing from him.

Tyler and I had a falling out…again.

Needless to say, he wasn’t happy to learn that Izzy had moved to his town—without me. At first, I’d gone by his house to tell him to watch over my Izzy. To keep an eye on her in case she needed anything, or in case Rodrigo decided to show his ugly mug. Tyler hadn’t understood what was happening or why I was refusing to talk about it.

Then Izzy had started to show that she was pregnant with my baby, and Tyler had figured it out. He realized pretty quickly that I freaked out something fierce—which I had—and then he accused me of being a coward—which I was.

Then he started calling me to tell me each and every time he saw her in town doing something or going somewhere, by freakin’ walking again, that I was a piece of shit for not manning up for my woman and the life that we had created.

Needless to say, each time he called, I got less polite about it. And each time I called him to check on her, he refused to tell me anything more than that she was okay.

Yes, our relationship was strained, and honestly, I didn’t blame him for his anger.

Hell, I was angry at myself.

But I was just so goddamned scared.