Forever Pucked (Pucked 4)
“Buck,” I warn.
“What? It’s not like we planned this,” he snaps.
“Heard of birth control, asshole?” Alex fires back.
Robbie throws his napkin down. “Alex, you’re making your sister upset. Sit down.”
For whatever reason, Robbie doesn’t look surprised about this. Maybe he’s not. Actually, as I survey the room, I can see that Charlene, Darren, me, and Alex are the only ones who seem the least bit shocked by this shocking news. Lily looks anxious, and Randy’s uncomfortable, maybe because Alex is being his usual overprotective self and he’s Buck’s bestie.
“You should apologize to Miller,” Sunny pipes up. “He’s not an a-hole. He loves me, and I love him, and I know you don’t use condoms either, Alex. Sometimes things happen that are outside of our control.” She gestures to his slowly healing face. “You should know this.”
“Congratulations?” My voice is excessively loud, and it comes out a question instead of like I’m happy for them.
Sunny gives me a small, watery, “Thanks, Violet.”
“You need to hug your sister,” I hiss at Alex as I round the table to do just that.
There’s a flurry of feminine chatter as we all gather around Sunny and hug her like she’s won the lottery, not like she’s going to spend the next nine months getting fat and uncomfortable. And the next twenty years dealing with a lot of responsibility.
Sunny has just become legal in the US. And now she’s going to be a mom. She’s in the middle of finishing school. She teaches yoga, which can’t be easy with a basketball hanging off the front of your body. It’s more than I can fathom.
And Buck, well, Sunny’s the first girl he’s ever been serious with. I mean, he’s really serious, but babies are a lot of work. More than house plants, that’s for sure. I can’t imagine he’s ready for that kind of full-on, endless responsibility. Why the fuck do people have babies? I can barely manage my own life, and taking care of Alex while he’s recovering from his hockey accident is like being punched in the tit by reality. And I haven’t even had to do it on my own yet.
Life isn’t all roses and unicorn farts made of glitter and Chanel No. 5. There are as many downs as there are ups. I need to learn how to manage them.
No one mentions the wedding again during brunch. The entire focus has shifted to the impending birth of Sunny and Buck’s accidental insemination.
One positive is that neither one of them mentions getting hitched before the baby pops. If Sunny and Buck jump on the wedding wagon, it’ll make things more difficult for Alex and me. Not that I wouldn’t understand. But I know Alex would have something to say about them tying the knot first, because Sunny is younger, and Alex likes to be number one, in all senses of the word—except the selfish context. I always come first.
-&-
By three in the afternoon, it’s obvious the number of people in the house has taken its toll on Alex. His sister being pregnant and suddenly planning a baby shower probably hasn’t been helpful, either. So it’s not much of a surprise when he starts nodding off on the couch while people are chatting.
He’s only been home a week. He’s still recovering.
So everyone leaves, except his parents, of course. There’s a conversation brewing. I know this. But Alex isn’t in any state to have it. I rouse him, gently, and get him to amble his way up to the bedroom.
He won’t let me go when he lies down; his one good arm is strong enough to keep me from getting away—not that I would want to do that anyway.
I let him pull me to him. I fully expect him to fall asleep again, but that’s not what happens. He lies there with his arm around me, breathing steadily, but I can tell he’s not out.
“Are you okay?” I ask, opening the door to angry town.
“I don’t know.”
“Because Sunny’s pregnant,” I say it more than ask.
“Yeah. No. I don’t know.” He sighs, and his grip on my waist tightens.
“What don’t you know about?”
His chest rises and falls a few times. “I just…she’s not ready.”
“I don’t think anyone’s ever ready.”
“Miller’s less ready.”
I think about that. About how good Buck is with kids. How patient, how caring. I also consider his dyslexia, which he manages fine, and how that will factor in with a kid, and how likely he is to pass it on. I don’t know the statistics on this kind of thing, but I know it’s something he’ll worry about.
Knowing Buck the way I do, I feel like this is something he’ll be super stressed about. He struggled so much with school and expectations. It’ll kill him if he has to watch his own kid go through the same thing. But his experience will make him able to manage it better. At least I hope it will. I’m sure it will. He’s a beautiful person. Hairy as a motherpucker, but a great human.