Ritual - Palm South University

My heart breaks at the sight of two tears streaming simultaneously down each of her cheeks, and I sigh, reaching out for her. In the next instant, she’s in my arms, holding me so tightly I chuckle.

“I already forgave you,” I tell her. “But I appreciate the genuine apology.” I pull back then, looking her in the eyes. “And I’m sorry I’ve been avoiding you. I just… I guess part of me wondered if that version of you I saw last semester was still hanging around. I was a little scared.”

“That’s fair,” she says, sniffing. She pulls a tissue from her purse and wipes daintily at her nose. “That version of me was an absolute monster.”

“And who are you now?”

She laughs at that, shaking her head as she folds the tissue. “Figuring that out.”

I smile, squeezing her arm. “You said you were in a dark place… what happened?”

“Oh, boy,” she says, blowing out a breath and looking around Greek Row. Then, she loops her arm through mine, steering me toward the house once more. “There’s a lot more to the story of everything that happened last semester, and before that. But… I can’t tell you. Not yet, okay? I’m just… I’m not there yet.” She looks at me with a glossy smile. “But I will be. One day. Hopefully soon.”

I cover her hand that’s looped through my arm, smiling back. “Whenever you’re ready.”

“Right now, I was kind of thinking… margaritas?”

I nudge her. “Oh, now you’re just trying to butter me up.”

“Is it working?”

“Add in some chips and guac, and I’ll be as buttered as a biscuit.”

We both laugh, and just like that, the past is the past.

At least, for now.THE LAST TWO WEEKS have been hell.

After seeing Cassie with Grayson, I completely lost it. I found myself in one of my old habits — numbing. And I knew it was wrong. I knew it wasn’t healthy. But there was literally nothing I could do to stop it.

I still can’t.

For the last couple of weeks, I’ve thrown myself into everything Alpha Sigma. I’ve spent more time with my brothers, worked on our plans for the semester and next, and more than anything, dedicated time and effort to getting everything in order for tonight’s event.

The Alpha Sigma Karaoke Showdown.

Jeremy had me worried, after our conversation a couple weeks ago, that I’d made a terrible decision in changing up the event. After all, he was right — the concert had been successful for two years. It was part of what got our fraternity on the map again. And as soon as it had a reputation, I get the big idea to go and change it up.

But now, halfway through the event and having already raised more than double what we did with the concert funds last year, I know I’ve made the right choice.

And still, I feel numb.

It doesn’t matter that the event has gone over without a hitch, that every fraternity and sorority showed up to participate and compete, that the crowd is packed with students from all over campus, here for the entertainment and the opportunity to help determine the winners.

It’s exactly as I imagined it.

Except that in my mind, I always saw Cassie right by my side through it all.

And since that day, I’ve been avoiding her.

It’s not that I don’t want to be with her. It’s the exact opposite, really. But, the first few times we hung out after I saw her with Grayson, I tried several different ways to get her to bring up that she’d talked to him. I asked about her classes, asked if anything strange had happened, asked if there was anything going on that she needed to talk about. I literally asked her in every single way I could without coming right out with it.

And she hadn’t said a word.

She still hasn’t told me that she spoke to him. For all she knows, I’m still oblivious to the fact that she’s talked to him at all since she found out he cheated on her at her semi-formal last year.

I’ve tried to understand, tried to give her space, tried to put my anger at bay by throwing myself into other things.

But one thing remains ominously true.

She’s hiding something from me, and now, I no longer trust her.

Every day, when that thought crosses my mind, a sharp pain like a knife to the gut passes through me. It happens again as I make my way across the large lawn where we’re hosting the concert during intermission. She’s standing with some of her sisters and my brothers, smiling and blushing and watching me walk toward her.

And I feel nothing but betrayal.

“There he is!” Kade says from where he’s standing in the crowd. He rushes over to me, launching himself high into the air and forcing me to catch him whether I want to or not. When he’s cradled in my arms — the beast of a guy — he rubs his knuckles against my skull. “El Presidente, putting on the best damn show this school has seen.”