Road to Nowhere (Road to Nowhere 1)

I smiled, sitting up on my knees in front of him, grabbing the beer out of his hand and placing it on the ground beside us. Throwing my arms around his neck for support as I straddled his waist. His legs went lax under me to allow more room for my belly. I snuggled my face close to his for a few seconds, resting my forehead against his when I was done.

“No one is going to hate you, because I won’t let them. And you know how persuasive I can be. I always get what I want, or else you wouldn’t be mine now.”

He smiled, wrapping his arms around me. Pulling me closer. “See… that’s where you’re fuckin’ wrong, Pippin, cuz I’ve always been yours.”

And for the first time since I met him.

I knew his words were true.

ELEVEN

*Mia*

“Baby girl is measurin’ right at thirty-two weeks. She’s approximately three and a half pounds right now,” Doc informed, measuring from the top of my belly to my pelvic area. Then proceeded to push all around, making the baby wiggle inside me. “She’s completely flipped, head’s down going into your birth canal.”

“Oh! That’s why her feet are always in my ribs,” I replied, looking over at Noah.

Creed was leaning against the doorframe to his room, allowing Noah to stand beside me. I was lying on the bed, while Doc examined my growing belly. I knew Creed wanted to be the one by my side, but he was respecting Noah and our situation. Noah had been coming around more often, now that I was closer to my due date. Acting as if nothing had happened between us, all the tension magically disappearing. We went back to being friends, talking about how we were going to make this work. Wanting to be the best parents we could to our child.

“Baby girl is growin’ fast, Mia. Only about eight weeks to go, maybe sooner. You guys think of a name for her, yet?” Doc questioned, looking from me to Noah, and back to me again.

“I have a name in mind. Actually, it was your momma who gave it to me,” I informed Noah. “What do you think about Madison? Can we call her Maddie for short? It means gift of God.”

Noah sat on the bed, placing his hand over my bare stomach, gently rubbing it all around. I didn’t have to look over at Creed to see the sad expression that would be staring back at me. I could feel it.

“What do you think, baby girl?” Noah leaned in, placing his lips close to my belly. “You like the name, Madison?”

As if on cue, she kicked Noah, making us both laugh. She was already so smart. He smiled, looking down at my belly with nothing but a loving look in his eyes.

“I think that was a yes.”

“Madison it is then. I can’t wait to meet you, hold you, and be your daddy,” Noah addressed, talking to her. Following her movement with his hands.

He crouched down further, leaning in closer, with his lips inches away from my skin. His breath stirring the same emotions inside of me as he did that night. I swallowed hard, overcome by the sentiment from his simple touch. Fully aware we weren’t alone this time. Something made me peer back at Creed.

We locked eyes.

Knowing he could feel it, too. He knew.

“You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me, Maddie,” Noah added, bringing my attention back to him. “You and your momma.” With that he kissed my stomach, allowing his lips to linger for a few moments. “I already love you, so much,” he murmured to my belly before he pulled away, standing up beside me again. His eyes were glossy with tears, but he quickly blinked them away. Shaking his head and clearing his throat.

The room fell silent for what felt like forever. Suddenly there was a huge elephant in the room, no one was going to address.

Especially me.

Doc pulled my shirt back down when he was done. “Pregnancy suits you, Mia. There are very few women who are still glowin’ at this point. It’s a good sign, means Madison won’t be too much trouble. Which is surprisin’ considering her bloodlines,” he joked, trying to break the strain in the room.

I couldn’t have been more appreciative of him for that.

“It’s been easy for the most part,” I sincerely answered, caressing my belly. “Other than being a little more tired than usual, she’s been good to me. I’m going to miss having her in my belly, though. Feeling her kicking inside me, flipping around. It’s the most amazing sensation.”

“Just means I gotta knock you up again, Pippin,” Creed vowed, speaking for the first time since my check-up started.

Noah narrowed his eyes at him, earning him a grin in return.

“How about we let Mia get dressed,” Doc ordered, winking at me. He gathered up his things and placed them in the black doctor bag by his side he always brought with him.

Since I was in my last trimester, he started stocking up the safe house with everything he’d need to deliver the baby. Including medications, fluids, and a bunch of weird looking instruments.

The boys nodded, walking toward the door and following Doc out. I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath when I heard the door close behind them.

“Penny for your thoughts?”

My eyes flew open, startled by Creed’s voice. Instantly looking in the direction it came from. He was leaning against the closed door, his arms folded over his chest. Eyeing me with a broody regard. I sat up, flinging the sheet off my body, reaching to grab my panties and yoga pants off the dresser.

He pushed off the door, walking over to me. Snatching my clothes before I could, he kneeled down in front of me and took a hold of my foot. I smiled as he helped me get dressed, knowing I was getting too big to do so by myself.

“Thank you,” I let out when he was finished. Standing face to face.

He grabbed my chin, making me look up at him. “Asked you a question, expectin’ an answer.”

“Sounded more like a statement to me.”

“Mia…”

I pulled away. “I have to take the chicken out of the oven before it burns. Doc is staying for dinner, and I told your brothers they could come inside to eat, too. I don’t want to feed ten people burnt food. And since you like to remind me that my place is in the kitchen, cooking your meals, then you should probably let me go do that,” I stated, giving him a curt nod. Sidestepping him to leave, but he caught my arm.

“This ain’t over.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” He let go but spanked my ass hard as I walked by, causing me to yelp.

We all sat around the dining room table, eating dinner together, for the first time since I had been there. It was a nice change from dining alone most nights at the kitchen island. Creed and his brothers, including Noah, had such a family dynamic to them. Reminding me so much of my own, making me miss them even more. He once told me that the MC was considered a brotherhood. They looked out for each other. Had one another’s backs, no matter what. Reminding me often, I was a part of their family now, because I was his woman.

And they protected their own.

I could finally see what he meant just by watching them together, and this was only a few of the brothers. I couldn’t even imagine what it would be like to have the whole club in the same room.

Diesel cleared his throat, bringing everyone’s attention to him. Raising his beer in the air, uttering, “I’d like to make a toast to Mia. For puttin’ up with us foul-mouthed bikers, makin’ this kickass fuckin’ meal, and for handlin’ this situation like a fuckin’ pro. Not being a little bitch or a pain in our fuckin’ asses.”

I laughed, smiling wide. “And here I thought you didn’t know my name.”

He knowingly nodded, giving Creed a smart-ass look. “We were told to treat you like a lady, and even God understands, none of us know what the fuck that is. So, we decided to keep our mouths shut, instead. Wouldn’t want to piss off lover boy over here.”

Creed flipped him off.

They spent the next hour, telling me funny stories about the club, shooting the shit, and filling me in on the good times and fond memories. It was one of the best nights I had in the last two and a half months. I

loved every second of it and was sad when it came to an end.

They all thanked me for the amazing home cooked meal when we were finished. Shocked when they started to help me clean up, loading their dirty dishes in the dishwasher and wiping down the table. Grabbing their beers and cigarettes, excusing themselves to go outside. Creed said something about them needing to have a word, whatever the hell that meant. He kissed me before he followed them out to the porch. I put away the leftovers, even though I knew they wouldn’t last long. Not with Creed and Noah both in the house.

I sighed, smiling when I realized Doc had left his take-out bag that I made for him, on the counter. For the life of me, I couldn’t figure out why he was still single. He was such a sweet man, had been since the day I met him. I had grown close to him in the last few months, he felt like an uncle.

I opened the front door and called out, “Hey, Doc! You forget something?” Holding up the food.

He laughed me off, setting his black bag in the side-by-side, and jogging toward me. I stepped off the porch on the side of the house so I could meet him half way.

“Man would forget his own head if it wasn’t attached to his goddamn body,” Diesel shouted from behind me.

“It’s okay, I’m forgetful too.” I handed him his bag. “I’m actually glad I have a second alone with you,” I whispered loud enough for him to hear, even though the boys were several feet away from us, in front of the safe house. “I just wanted to thank you. You have no idea how much of a relief it’s been to have you come by as much as you do. I will never be able to repay you for the peace of mind you have given me with my baby girl.”

He placed his hand on my stomach. “Mia, for the first time in I don’t know how long, I’m actually doin’ somethin’ good. It’s been an honor to be part of your journey with Maddie. I can’t wait to help you brin’ her into this world.”

I nodded, pulling him into a hug. He froze, not expecting my gesture.

“Doc, your old ass tryin’ to hit on my girl?”

“Don’t listen to him. He’s just being Creed.”

He finally relaxed, and I felt the tension release from his biceps as he hugged me back. “You better go inside, before you catch a cold,” he murmured, reminding me of something my dad would say.

My momma always told me I had the ability to make people smile, to make them laugh. To make them feel whole when they might have been broken. She called it my special gift. Saying the world was surrounded by too much devastation, destruction, and despair—where bad things happened to good people every single day.

To people who didn’t deserve it.

To people who didn’t expect it.

And to some people…

Who did.

I refused to ever think like that. I wouldn’t let evil taint me. Take me under. Allow it to consume my mind, my body, and especially my heart.

But I couldn’t have been more wrong.

This would be the moment in my life where evil would win. It would prevail and destroy, conquer and succeed, setting the tracks in motion for the collision courses to hit head on.

My mind would be forever changed.

My body forever damaged.

My heart eternally broken.

As soon as I pulled away, I turned around, locking eyes with Creed. Except, this time he wasn’t smiling back at me. He wasn’t laughing. He was no longer the man I made whole. The man I spent years loving, praying he’d love me back, was gone. There was nothing but his regrets in between us, his truths bleeding out for all to see. It was the expression on his face that would forever haunt me. I’d never forget the look in his eyes, the moment he realized…

He was going to die.

The next few seconds played out in slow motion, as if this was just a figment of my imagination and not my reality of what loving a Jameson man would bring.

His world collided with mine, leaving nothing but destruction in its wake.

Where neither one of us would make it out, alive.

“NO!” Creed shouted with everything he had in him. “MIA, RUN!” he roared, an ear-piercing sound that resonated deep within his lungs, echoing off the trees and into the woods as he simultaneously pulled out his gun from the back of his jeans. Aiming it right for me, he didn’t hesitate, pulling the trigger.

“Cree—” I stumbled forward, trying to remain upright.

I couldn’t move.

I couldn’t breathe.

More gunshots, more bullets, more chaos erupted all around me. Time stood still, or maybe it moved faster. Everything blended together. Nothing made sense.

I was there, but I wasn’t.

My trembling hands moved down to my chest and stomach, shielding myself as best as I could while I staggered on my feet. Trying to regain my balance, swaying all over, on the verge of becoming one with the ground. My eyes blurred, my vision tunneled, darkness drew me in and out.

“GET HER OUT OF HERE!” I heard Noah scream, or it could have been Creed.

It all sounded the same—the panic, the voices, the lives that were being taken, collapsing to the ground. I made one last attempt, willing my feet to run. Gasping for air, struggling to stay standing, all while shades of copper flew inches away from my body. From my face.

From my life.

And my baby’s.

“Cre-ed… He-ee-lllp m-eee…” I managed to sputter, reaching my hand out to no one. I suddenly fell backward as strong arms caught me in their grasp. Bringing my limp body to the hard ground with them. I thought they were Doc’s.

“Baby, baby, baby… no, no, no…” he stammered, close to my face. “Stay with me. You fuckin’ stay wit’ me.”

Through hooded eyes, I saw Creed above me. Covered in blood, in anguish, in hatred and despair.

It was only then I finally realized…

I’d been shot.

TWELVE

*Creed*

“What the fuck?” Diesel snapped, his eyes focusing on something behind me.

I spun around, following his stare. Narrowing my eyes, searching the dense woods just beyond Mia and Doc. Trying to locate what he saw. Never expecting what stared back at me.

Choices…

Everyone had them. Especially me.

Good.

Bad.

Right.

Wrong.

They were one in the same. I couldn’t tell them apart anymore or maybe…

I never could.

My life had been defined by decisions. Most of which cost me my morality, and a man without a conscience was capable of anything.

Now.

Forever.

And every day in between.

I thought my life was forever fucking gone the moment that I killed Luke. Brutally ripping away everything I wanted to believe in. Everything I prayed to be true.

Violence was all I ever knew.

The blood on my hands was so fucking thick, it became part of my skin. Engrained so far deep into my pores that I was drenched in nothing but the lives I had taken.

Until I met Mia Ryder.

She was a woman to love. To cherish. To fucking claim.

She was mine.

I wanted to be a part of her world. Never wanting to bring her into ours. Trying so damn hard to separate the two, but failing fucking miserably. This was the moment life had fucking saved just for me.

It. Ended. Here.

What started with her.

Ended with her.

My heart dropped, my chest seized, and all the blood drained from my face when I saw the barrel of the rifle peering from behind the tree. Giving me no time to react, I was driven on pure instinct.

My past and my present collided, leaving no road for the future.

Mia turned around as if she felt my pain.

My agony.

My heart bleeding out for her.

“NO!” I yelled out as loud as I could, pulling out my gun from the back of my jeans. The desperation in my voice echoed through the woods, vibrating against m

y core. I screamed till nothing came out, my chest aching. Instantly tearing up my throat. “MIA, RUN!” I roared, lifting my gun, aiming it right in her path. Not thinking twice about pulling the fucking trigger as a shot simultaneously fired from the rifle in the woods.

I would never forget the look on her face when she saw the bullet leave the barrel of my gun, never hearing the shots fired from behind her.

“Cree—” Her whole body flew forward from the unexpected blow.

I froze, not believing the scene unfolding in front of me as casings continued to fly. For a second, it wasn’t Mia’s petrified expression staring back at me. Desperately penetrating my eyes. Searching for answers. Looking for help.

They were Luke’s.

My chest heaved, unable to hold back my hammering heart any longer. I could hear the drone in my ears, loud and clear. Memories of that night came flooding back, attacking my mind and assaulting my senses. Making me feel as if I was still in the clubhouse.

Where I just murdered my brother.

“GET HER OUT OF HERE!” I heard Noah scream, pulling me back to reality, back to the safe house in the woods, where Mia was the one who had just been shot. This was far worse than the place my mind had wandered. Bullets were flying in every direction. All hell had broken loose, and war was upon us once again.

I ran.

I ran as fast as I fucking could to my girl.

Sprinting to get to her. Immediately opening fire, lacing anyone who crossed me. Bullets recoiled off the trees, where men were trying to take cover, including Doc. Shielding themselves as best as they could, returning fire. I felt a burning sting graze my shoulder, and then again at the side of my stomach. Blood flew everywhere, not knowing if it was theirs or mine. I didn’t let that slow me down. An endless stream of bullets continued to fill the night air. Brothers running alongside me, trying to cover me so I could get to her. Knowing I only had one end in sight.

Adrenaline coursed through my veins, throbbing through my bloodstream. Taking over every last inch of my body. My heart continued to pound against my chest. My vision tunneled, watching as Mia’s quivering hands protectively went straight to her chest and stomach. She lost her footing, trying to take a step toward me. Not noticing she wasn’t going anywhere but side to side. Stumbling all over while blood continued to gush out of her pink shirt.