Not Meant To Be Broken

Kevin spoke up again. “Reagan came home with me, maybe she can help.”

Maybe a woman wouldn't frighten Amber so much.

“Yes, can you get her?” Brian asked.

Kevin nodded and with a last glance in Amber’s direction, he disappeared from our view. I straightened and began pacing. I felt like I was going to burst from tension. Kevin returned with Reagan at his side. Brian practically jumped to his feet. “Reagan, thank god, you're here. Maybe you can get through to her.”

Shock crossed Reagan’s face when she spotted Amber. Her red hair was up in a high-ponytail and her shorts and workout-shirt were drenched in sweat. She must have jogged here. She tensed and for a heart-stopping moment I thought she’d say she couldn’t do this, couldn’t handle Amber. But Reagan snapped out of it. Slowly she approached her and lowered herself to the ground a good distance away from Amber before she crawled closer to Amber, who was still rocking herself on the ground. Reagan extended a hand and touched Amber's shoulder. Amber jerked back, but Reagan didn’t let go. “Shhh. It's alright. Everything is alright,” she cooed. Amber relaxed visibly. Reagan didn’t look very intimidating anyway with her freckles and lanky limbs.

“Go away,” she mouthed at us, her eyes imploring. Brian hesitated but I gripped his arm.

“Come on, Brian. Let's go into the kitchen. Reagan needs some time alone with Amber.”

“I guess you are right.” Kevin, Bill and Jason started to follow us but I turned around to the two idiots who’d caused the mess, “You,” I pointed at them. “Get lost. You've done enough damage for one day.”

Jason looked really miserable but Bill just shrugged and left the apartment. Asshole. I shook my head at his behavior and walked into the kitchen. Brian, Kevin and I sat down around the table and stared at each other for a moment. Apparently, neither of us knew what to say. Kevin kept throwing glances my way. Maybe he'd finally realized that Amber wasn’t ready for any kind of relationship. Especially not with me. I wasn’t the right guy for a girl like her.

“Reagan will help her,” he said eventually. I wasn’t sure if it was meant to console me, or Brian. Brian didn’t even raise his head from where he rested it on the table. No sounds were coming from the living room. I wished I knew what was happening. What if Reagan couldn’t talk Amber out of her panic attack? Seeing her like that, so broken and frightened, it was the worst thing I'd ever witnessed. I hated feeling so fucking helpless.

Amber

Someone touched my shoulder. I tried to get away from the person, away from the pain that would surely follow.

“Shhh...It's alright. Everything is alright,” a woman said. Her voice sounded kind, not threatening at all. I relaxed but I didn’t dare to lift my head yet. I didn’t want to see what was going on around me. Someone sat beside me and our shoulders brushed lightly. I shivered but didn’t pull back. Something about the person made me calm.

“Amber?” The woman asked softly.

Hesitantly, I turned my head to the side and lifted it from my knees. Kind brown eyes returned my gaze. Next to me sat a girl about my age, with long legs crossed at the ankles in front of her, red hair pulled into a ponytail. She looked like she’d been working out when she found me. She was wearing turquoise Nike running shoes and matching shorts.

She smiled. “'I'm Reagan. A friend of your brother.” God, I hoped Brian hadn’t called her out of the gym to deal with me.

I wiped the wetness from my cheeks and sat up a bit straighter. I wasn’t sure how much time had passed since I’d lost control of myself. I remembered hearing Brian’s and Zach’s voice while I was drowning in my panic.

“I'm Kevin's girlfriend. He's living in the apartment at the end of the hall. He's friends with Zach and Brian. I don't think you've met him yet,” she chattered in a light tone, completely ignoring the fact that we were sitting on the ground, because I'd broken down. God, I was still only clad in a towel and the blanket that rested over my legs. I was a pathetic sight. But she didn’t say anything about it, and I was infinitely grateful for that.

“I'm Amber, Brian's sister,” I said lamely, though she probably knew that already. She smiled and rose to her feet, holding her hand out for me to take. “Let's go to your room. There we can talk some more.” I took her hand and stood up. She was a few inches taller than me and built like a hurdle runner, all long limbs and thin body. She quickly released me and grimaced. “Sorry. I’m sweaty. I really need to shower. Do I stink very badly?”

“Not very badly,” I said. She laughed. “Well, that’s a relief!” A tiny smile tugged at my lips. I led her toward my room where Pumpkin was pacing in front of the door. He nudged my calf as I entered, then he peered up at Reagan before striding over to the sofa and curling up on it. Reagan was watching him with obvious unease. I supposed everyone was scared of something, even a harmless cat. I took a few clothes out of the drawer. “Why don’t you take a shower in our bathroom while I get dressed?” I held up my jeans and shirt. “The bathroom is next door.”

“Thanks, but I can shower at Kevin’s. That’s where I left the bag with my clean clothes anyway.”

“Oh, okay.” I paused. She was leaning against my door, her eyes taking in the bare walls and empty desk. “How long have you been living here?”

“For a few days,” I said. I really wanted to get out of my towel and into my comfortable clothes, but I couldn’t undress with Reagan in the room. “I haven’t gotten a chance to put up pictures yet.”

“What kind of pictures? I love Miró.”

I flushed. “I don’t know. I’ll have to buy a few prints and frames.”

Reagan’s eyes darted to the clothes I still held in my hand. “I can turn around, or do you need me to go outside?”

I quickly shook my head. “No, turning around is fine.” I wasn’t sure if it was. She turned her back to me and reached for her ponytail, pulling out the hair tie.

Not taking my eyes off of her, I dropped the towel and dressed in record time. “It’s okay.”

Reagan faced me. “How about we go looking for pictures together? I know an amazing art store that sells beautiful bargain prints.”

I didn’t give my anxieties time to take over. “Sure. That sounds good.”

“Great!” She walked over to my desk and grabbed my phone. “I’ll put my number into your contacts.” Her fingers typed lightening fast, and a beep sounded. She pulled out her phone from the holder around her upper arm. “And now I have your number too. Send me a message if you feel up to going shopping?”

I nodded. “If I don’t, will you remind me again?” Sometimes I needed a little push. This social life thing, this whole living thing was new for me.

“You bet I will! I can’t wait.” She glanced at the watch around her wrist. “Shit. I need to hurry. I have Russian literature in ninety minutes. I can’t go there looking like a train wreck.” She scanned my face. “Are you going to be okay? I have a perfect attendance record, it wouldn’t be a problem if I skipped once. I could stay with you and we could grab something to eat.”

“No, I’m okay. Really.” I didn’t want Reagan to miss classes because of me. It was bad enough that I’d caused her and everyone else so much worry with my breakdown. “Russian literature? So you’re in College.”

Her hand on the door handle, she said. “Yeah, I’m majoring in Russian and French.”

“Wow. Maybe you can tell me more about it when we go shopping?”

“Deal. But I should warn you. Once I start talking about it, I probably won’t stop.” With a wave, she slipped out and closed the door. Somehow a day that could have become the biggest nightmare in months had turned out okay, thanks to Reagan. She seemed relaxed and in control of her life. Maybe we could become friends.

Zachary

Reagan appeared in the kitchen and walked over to Kevin. She slung her arms around his neck and kissed the top of his head, smiling. “I need to grab a shower. I don’t want to be late for classes.”

Brian’s h

ead shot up from his arm. “How's Amber?” I'd never seen him like this. He'd always been a pensive guy but right now he was bordering on depressed. Not that I could blame him. It had been hell for me to watch Amber like that, how much worse must it have been for Brian?

Reagan gave Brian a reassuring smile as she straightened. “She's fine,” she said. “She agreed to go shopping with me. Remember that art store I talked about?” The last was said to Kevin. “Of course. You showed me their website. I’m sure Amber will love it.”

“I know. We’ll buy a few prints for her room.”

Brian’s eyebrows climbed his forehead. “She said yes?”

Reagan nodded. “I really need to go now.”

“I’ll join you,” Kevin said quickly, practically leaping off the chair. The way he undressed Reagan with his eyes, I doubted he had only showering in mind. They left the kitchen, holding hands.

Brian followed them with his gaze, his shoulders tense. I punched his arm lightly. “Reagan said Amber is okay. Stop worrying.”

“How can I stop worrying, Zach? You saw her.”

I leaned back with my chair until it rested against the counter and the front legs were in the air. He was right. “Do you have classes in the afternoon?”

“Yeah, but I won’t go. I don't want to leave Amber alone after what happened today. And I can’t focus on stuff like that right now.”

“Me too.” Not that I usually needed a reason to skip classes. “Do you want to order pizza? I’m starving.”

“Are you sure you don’t want to go? You’ve been bailing on classes a lot lately.”