Wrong For Me

“Oakley?” he whispers.

“Yeah?”

“You know I love you, right?”

I squeeze my eyes shut, forcing my hand not to curl into his T-shirt. “Yeah, Row, I know.”When the alarm on my phone goes off, I quietly pull myself from the sofa. I’m careful not to wake Havannah, who must have crashed in my dad’s room again since I fell asleep on the couch. She refuses the guest bedroom.

After a quick rinse, I dry my long blonde hair and dress in a pair of jeans and a Blackline Academy T-shirt.

I send a short and sweet good morning text to my dad and write out a note for Havannah, telling her not to forget to lock up when she leaves today since I came home to an unlocked house yesterday. Then, I snag my keys and run out the door.

When I look across my lawn to Rowan’s mom’s house, I stop.

Rowan is standing beside his truck, dressed the same as me, holding what looks to be two protein shakes.

He smiles, and I grin back, walking the few feet to him.

“Look at you, up before dawn. I’m proud,” I tease.

He chuckles. “Thought I’d try out this whole overachiever routine you’ve got going. You know, virtually no sleeping or eating and still killin’ it at everything else.”

“Funny.” I roll my eyes, smiling.

He holds my eyes a moment and then looks away, snickering. “I, uh … I woke up just before you today and ran to my mom’s to get showered. Thought we could ride together.”

My gaze roams his face. “You stayed last night?”

He licks his lips, bringing his eyes back to mine, but he doesn’t say anything, so I don’t push.

“You sure you wanna take me?” I ask him. “You don’t have to be there for another hour and a half, and you leave before me.”

He shrugs. “I could help you with your work.”

I laugh. “Ooor you could go into the gym.”

“Or that.”

“All right.” I take one of the protein shakes from him and hip-check past him to open the passenger door. “Let’s go, Chief.”

“Maybe one day.”

He laughs, and I look to him.

“Definitely one day.”

After a few minutes, Rowan starts chuckling in his seat. “Remember our plan from when we were kids?”

“What plan?” I tease.

He smiles, knocking me with his elbow. “We were gonna run away together, live by the beach, and work for Willy Wonka.”

“Eat candy all day and then play in the sand all night.”

“Drive go-karts everywhere we went.”

I laugh, and he joins in, glancing my way and then back at the road.

“We had it all figured out, Oaks,” he says quietly.

My smile turns sad, so I shift to look out the window, noticing the deep inhale he takes as I do.

“We sure thought we did, didn’t we?”

When we pull into the parking lot, I go to get out, but Rowan grabs my bicep, halting me. I shift my gaze to his, finding he’s looking at the only other vehicle in the lot—Alec’s truck.

“Oakley …” He sighs and drops his chin to his chest. “When you think about your life, ten or twenty years from now, what do you see?”

Slowly, I drop against the seat. “I’m not sure I’ve thought about it, to be honest.”

He nods, still not looking at me. “When I think about the future, later in life and where I’ll be, there’s so much that’s blurred.”

I understand where he’s coming from. We’re only twenty. I don’t think we’re supposed to have it all figured out yet.

“But, Oak”—he brings his honey-colored eyes to mine—“the one thing that is clear is you, right there with me. Always.”

I stare at him, into his soul. My friend.

“I hope so, Rowan.” I give a half-smile, formed from sorrow, and escape the truck as quickly as I can.

As I come around, he’s already standing there with our bags in hand. He throws his arm around my shoulders and pulls me close. I shut my eyes, letting him steer me to the door, wanting to say something about what he just admitted but unsure of what or how.

When I hear the door open, so do my eyes, and I’m nailed with a pair of frosty green ones.

There Alec sits, perched on my desk, with nothing in hand.

Waiting for me.

But why?

My brows pull in, and I move to step forward, but Rowan’s hold on my shoulder tightens. Slowly, he pulls us through the door.

“Everything all right?” I cautiously ask Alec, uneasiness making my stomach turn.

He stares at me, looks to Rowan, and then stands. He says nothing, just disappears through the doorway that leads to his office.

Rowan drops his arm from me with an irritated sigh and sets my bag down. “I’m going to the gym.” Then, he’s gone.

And I’m left standing in the doorway, thoroughly confused and emotionally spent.

It’s five forty-five in the morning, and I’m ready to go home.