Cramped Quarters - Love Under Lockdown

Culture taught the singer, Tobias Forge, to think for

himself and be independent. The light that helps me

see? A reference to Lucifer as the bringer of light.

In this case meant metaphorically in terms of shedding

light on the truth in the darkness of lies.There was a long pause then and I could tell she was thinking. I was a bit anxious as I awaited her response, wondering if she would go back to hating me. The ‘Rachel is typing….’ coming up several times at the bottom left of the messenger window. Finally, I received a response.Rachel: Meet me in the living room?Me: Of course.It was like an old-school comedy skit, both of us coming out at once, nearly bumping into each other on the way to the couch. Rachel was the first to laugh at our silliness. Seeing her relax helped me to, also.

“Couch?” I asked.

“Certainly.”

“Ladies first.”

I watched as she went to the couch, and sat down, pulling one leg up under her. The hem of her dress, a cute, light, summery thing swishing as she walked.

She really was my opposite in most things, at least on a superficial level. Though, as we were both beginning to learn, there was a lot more to life than that.

I sat down on the other end of the couch, still not sure about her comfort level and not wanting to freak her out.

“So, Lucifer is a metaphor?” she asked.

“Yes, almost always, except among the theological. Be they monotheists or Satanists.”

“Theological Satanists?”

“Yeah. Basically, they’re inverted Christians, who have read and believed the Bible and decided ‘I’m goin’ with the other guy.’ They are a minority even among Satanists. They give the rest of us a bad rep.”

“What are you?” Rachel asked, curiously.

“Modern LaVeyan. Basically, we take the basic principles of the original Church of Satan, including the Seven Tenets, while also modernizing them, particularly in terms of women. LaVey was surprisingly humanist, particularly considering that he wrote the tenants in the late sixties, but he still had some old fashioned ideas, which was understandable, considering that he was born in the thirties. In many ways, he was a contemporary of Kenneth Anger.”

She took a moment, seeming to process the new information which, I would have been the first to admit, came a bit fast and furious. I lost both a filter and all sense of time when I started talking about things I cared about.

I also tended to start shouting as well when having a conversation I was deeply passionate about. But seeing as how Rachel wasn’t reeling back in abject terror, I didn’t think that had happened. I was doing my best not to scare her.

“What are the Seven Tenets?”

“The core principles of the LaVeyan school. Similar to your Ten Commandments, only shorter.”

“Do you know what they are? I mean all of them?”

“Sure. Um, let’s see. One should strive to act with compassion and empathy to all creatures, within reason. The struggle for justice is a necessary and ongoing pursuit that should prevail over laws and institutions. The body is inviolable, subject to one’s will alone. The freedoms of others should be respected, including the freedom to offend.

“Beliefs should conform to one’s best scientific understanding of the world; one should take care to never to distort scientific facts to fit one’s beliefs. People are fallible; if one makes a mistake, one should do one’s best to rectify it. Every tenet is a guiding principle, designed to inspire nobility in action and thought.”

She looked like a deer caught in headlights, clearly never having heard any such thing before in her short life.

“That’s not exactly it, but close enough, I-”

Rachel leaped at me in what I could only call an attack-hug. She wrapped herself around me, her hand holding on for dear life, like she might die if she ever let go.

Just as I was trying to figure out if it was a really aggressive come-on, her soft sobs wet my shoulder, making matters very clear. She needed comforting.

Getting over my own initial shock, overcome with surprising empathy, I held her, gently stroking her back as she let it out.

I knew in that moment that the scarring had definitely been forced, as well as who had put the marks on her.

I’d never seen quite a strong reaction to hearing the tenets, but I could also understand it, considering what she must have been hearing since she was little.

Religious instruction was one thing and not something I really had an issue with. Brainwashing was quite another.

Even with her lovely, gentle warmth pressed up against me, my thoughts remained pure. Or at least as pure as they could.

Sexy thoughts were honestly nowhere near my mind.

The context was far too harrowing for any such considerations. I just waited it out, rocking her gently as possibly years of pain and repression came up all at once.