The Boy Who Has No Belief (Soulless 7)

He was still speechless.

“I’ll talk to you later, Dad.”

“Derek?”

I stayed on the line. “Yeah?”

“What brought this on?”

“You’ve always made us a priority, and I realized I haven’t done the same. You were just as busy as I am now, and that didn’t change anything.”

“But I’m your father, Derek. That’s my job. When you’re a father someday, you’ll prioritize your time too.”

“But I want to prioritize you now just the same.”

He turned quiet again. “You spent the last ten years starting your life. Don’t feel bad about that. But yes, we would both love to see you more. Nothing would make us happier. And nothing makes us happier than watching you be happy again, watching you be the thoughtful, affectionate, and selfless boy you used to be.”8EmersonLizzie and I sat at the dining table and had dinner together. She told me about school, her friends, and soccer practice. Chicken and rice was on the menu with a side of broccoli, and she didn’t complain about it.

“Good news. I found you a tutor.”

She looked up from her food, her eyebrows raised. “Mom, we both know that’s a waste of time. There’s no tutor on this earth that could help me understand all that mumbo jumbo.” She continued to eat. “Save your money, you know?”

“I think your experience will be different with this tutor.”

“Unlikely. Serious, Mom, we could spend that money on something useful…like cheeseburgers.”

“I don’t think that’s a good investment, Lizzie. I’d rather spend money on your education than anything else. But that doesn’t matter because this tutor is free.”

She cocked an eyebrow. “If someone does something for free, they can’t be that great.”

“It’s my boss.”

She almost dropped her fork. “Your boss offered to teach me?”

I nodded. “He’s an expert in all things math and science, so he’ll be able to get you to grasp all of this without any issues. He’ll be a major upgrade from all the tutors you’ve had before.”

“Why would he offer to do that?” she asked bluntly. “Isn’t he busy spending all his money on cheeseburgers?”

When she got older, she would realize her money would be sucked into rent, health insurance, and bills…and her money couldn’t be thrown at good meals. “He’s never too busy to help a student. He’s a professor at NYU, so he’s used to teaching students.”

“Uh, genius students. Not seventh-grade math. You asked him, didn’t you?”

“No. He offered.”

“How did he even know I’m a bad student?”

“You aren’t a bad student,” I said defensively. “And I talk about you all the time. He wants to help. It’s really not a big deal, Lizzie.”

She took a few more bites of her food as she considered everything I’d said. “I’m just surprised, I guess.”

“Well, we’re very good friends.”

She rolled her eyes. “Right…”

“Lizzie.”

She smiled. “Just teasing. But I don’t want you to get fired. He might get so frustrated with me that he’ll want nothing to do with either one of us again.”

“That would never happen, Lizzie.”

“When is this happening?”

“I thought we could do it two nights a week. Tuesdays and Thursdays.”

She shrugged. “Alright. I got a C- on my last test, so…”

And that would mess up her GPA big-time. She wasn’t in high school yet, so those grades didn’t really matter, but they would start to matter once she got to high school. I wanted her to be prepared for that. “I think that’s about to change, Lizzie.”We sat together in the back seat as we drove to work.

He turned to me, leaned over and kissed me, and then gave me a nice smile before he opened his bag and pulled out his paperwork. He was in a black hoodie and dark jeans, his muscled physique stretching the cotton fabric of his sweater in sexy ways.

My eyes lingered for a bit, my body sexually awakened by this man. I wished our nights were spent together in naked passion, and then in the morning we had another round before we got ready for the day. It was something lovers took for granted, and while I loved my daughter more than anything in this world, she was the reason we couldn’t fully be together. “Did you have fun with Dex?”

“Yeah. It was nice to spend time with him. I wish I got to see him more.”

“I bet. Where is his residency?”

“Johns Hopkins. Maryland.”

“Oh wow. He came far to see you.”

“Yeah, that was nice of him.” He gave a slight smile before he looked down at his paperwork.

“You did great on Saturday.”

He turned to look at me but didn’t respond.

“I missed you…” Whenever I looked at his handsome face, I fell deeper, craved that closeness that I couldn’t get anywhere else. It wasn’t a sense of lust, more than affection, something I couldn’t describe. I just wanted his arms around me, to bury my face in his hard chest, to feel his fingertips glide into my hair before he pressed a kiss to my hairline. I wanted that—all the time. I’d wanted to spend our weekend in bed, celebrating his book signing, just living in the moment together.