Best Fake Fiance (Loveless Brothers 2)

Shit, I’m gonna need a flow chart to keep track of who knows what.

“I’m probably the only person right now who hasn’t got any questions at all,” he says, downshifting to go around a sharp turn. “Unlike Rusty, I know what it means when a woman is still at a man’s house at six o’clock in the morning.”

“Right,” I say. “So… how are the trees?”

The answer to that question is surprisingly complex and interesting. Most of the trees are well. Some of the trees are in trouble. He’s trying to convince the Forest Service to do slightly more prescribed burns this year than normal, to clear out the brush, and just as I ask how many acres they usually burn, my phone rings. It’s my sister.

“Sorry, one sec,” I tell Levi. “Hey, Betsy.”

“What happened?” she asks.

“I’m fine, it’s nothing,” I tell her.

“You called me at five-fifty in the morning,” she says. “That’s not a nothing time, Chuck.”

“Is that Elizabeth?” Levi asks.

“Is that Daniel?” Elizabeth asks.

I nod at Levi.

“It’s Levi,” I tell Elizabeth.

The line goes dead silent for at least five full seconds.

“It’s Levi?” she asks.

I’ve never heard my sister sound more astonished. I just start laughing.

“Surprise!” I say.

“What?” she hisses into the phone. Another silence.

Then: “Charlotte Alexandra, are you fucking with me?”

“Of course not,” I say. “It’s Levi. It’s six in the morning and I am currently with one Levi Loveless. Hand to God, Betsy.”

Levi glances over at me, one eyebrow raised, an entertained half-smile on his face.

“Tell her I say hi,” he says.

“Levi says hi,” I tell Elizabeth.

“You’re definitely fucking with me,” she says.

“Elizabeth, she’s fucking with you,” Levi says, raising his voice slightly. “I am merely your sister’s conveyance. Our relationship is platonic.”

“He’s giving me a ride home from Daniel’s,” I say, still laughing. “That’s why I called you, but your phone went to voicemail.”

Next to me, Levi is just shaking his head.

“I see,” Elizabeth says. “Just so I’ve got everything straight, you were at Daniel’s at five-forty-five this morning?”

“Technically, it’s his mom’s—”

“Charles.”

“Yes.”

“I see. You want to get breakfast in an hour? Mountain Grind?”

“Sure,” I say. After a few more exchanges, we hang up, and I look over at Levi.

“Sorry for involving you in that,” I say. “Sometimes I can’t help but mess with her, she can be such a know-it-all.”

There’s that slight smile again as the truck comes to a stop and Levi looks left, then right.

“Oh, I understand completely,” he says. “You know my family. Some of them rather well.”

I blush, laugh, and change the subject.When we get to my house, Levi insists on walking me to my door. I accept, because I’ve learned it’s pointless to argue with a Loveless man on matters of chivalry.

I make some more coffee, shower as fast as I can, put on new clothes, and head back out to the Mountain Grind. It’s only about six blocks away, so I walk, but I’m somehow still ten minutes late.

Elizabeth’s sitting by the window, messing with her phone, two cups of coffee in front of her, a plastic number eleven in a stand. She doesn’t say anything as I sit, just pushes one of the cups forward.

“Thanks,” I say, and start on my third cup of coffee for the morning.

“I got impatient and ordered already,” she says. “I hope you wanted a breakfast burrito.”

“That sounds magnificent.”

She takes a long sip of her own coffee, and I take the moment to marvel at my older sister. It’s seven in the morning, and she’s wearing mascara and a necklace along with her jeans and shirt.

How does anyone accessorize this early? I just feel lucky that my shoes match.

“You boned him, right?” she asks. “Please don’t tell me you were up all night just talking or something.”

“What’s wrong with that?” I ask, ignoring the first part of the question for now, just to fuck with her a little more.

“You’ve wanted his dick for like ten—”

An older woman I don’t recognize turns and looks at Elizabeth, and she looks away, toward the window, clears her throat.

“—like ten years,” she finishes, her voice considerably lower.

“It hasn’t been that long,” I protest.

“Charlie,” she says, leaning in. “Did. You. Bang. Daniel—”

“Yes,” I hiss, also leaning in.

“Atta girl,” she says, and holds out one fist. I bump it with mine. “That was the first time, right?”

I just sip my coffee and lean my chin on one hand.

“I bought you breakfast,” she says, narrowing her eyes. “Come on.”

“Yes, first time,” I say. “We went cake tasting yesterday and he picked me up and I forgot I didn’t have my car there…”

I sketch the vague details: no car, sleeping Rusty, Levi to the rescue. She won’t stop grinning like the cat that ate the canary, so by the end of my story, we’re both giggling.

“I hope he finds your underwear,” she says. “At least they don’t have a dog, that could be a disaster.”