Atone (The Disciples 2)

“You always were the strong one.” He beats my back with his fists.

I pull back and walk to his bike. A few Disciples greet me. I guess beating Lucky to death has made me a hero. It doesn’t matter now. Nothing matters now.

I know why I came back. Everybody will feel a huge relief after it’s done. It should have happened ten years ago, but I’m finally fixing it now.

Edge’s bike roars as I start it and I twist the throttle a couple of times.

My eyes find his. Brother to brother, we nod, and I drive away, heading into the darkness, heading for my peace.CHARLIEI wake, not because the alarm went off but because Doug tossed his arm over my stomach almost making me want to throw up.

“Shit.” I sit up and push his arm off me as I rub my temples.

We probably did not need those last two shots of Patron on our way out last night.

It was girls’ night again and Doug slept over like he does almost every girls’ night. As I reach for the phone, the screen shows it’s earlier than I need to be up. Still, I’ll get some coffee going and relax in a hot shower before I have to open. It’s Saturday, so our mornings are crazy.

As I push the button on the Cuisinart, I search my fuzzy memory. I’m sure I asked my mom to come in early in case Cindy and I need help. God, I hope I did. Yawning, I strip out of my clothes from yesterday. Guess I passed out still wearing them.

Doug must have done the same. He rolls over still in his black tee and pants. Although, come on, he’s still wearing his Converse?

I shake my head as I start the shower and do some stretches to get the blood pumping. But I need Advil, coffee, and not to keep drinking tequila.

When I step in, the soothing heat makes me sigh.

If Doug wasn’t passed out in the other room, I’d masturbate to take the edge off. It only makes me feel better for about a minute. I’ll close my eyes and see him and that’s usually all it takes.

“God,” I groan. I’m slightly hungover but let’s face it: I’m depressed. I miss him. I don’t even hate him anymore, but I wish things were different. I know he’s alive, and I know he got help. That should make me feel better. Yet nothing does. You don’t simply fall out of love even if you know that person is never coming back.

After showering, I step out and look at myself in the mirror. Doug and Dolly are right—I need to get healthy. Brushing my teeth, I decide to actually put on some makeup today. My eyes are two dark holes, and my mom is hopefully going to be there. It upsets her if I look like shit. She still hasn’t gotten past the I-told-you-so looks. It’s been months and she’s still telling me so…

Pulling on panties and a bra, I go to get some coffee and hear Doug groaning and cursing all tequila.

“You want coffee?” I yell from the kitchen.

“God, yes. I’m taking a shower. Be out in a minute.”

After pouring us both a steaming cup, I walk into my closet and pick out a pair of white pants and a tight black, glittery tee with Jim Morrison on the front. On a whim, I pull on a new pair of pink Adidas, which I bought the other day. They looked cute and I’m desperate for anything that makes me a little bit happy.

Walking out, I find Doug sitting in the kitchen vaping and drinking his coffee as he reads on his phone. “Dolly wants to come to the diner for breakfast.”

He doesn’t look up, so I grab a cup of coffee and call over my shoulder, “I’ll be ready in ten minutes.”

Two hours later, the breakfast crowd is almost cleared out, and it’s mostly our regulars. Dolly and Doug sit at the counter arguing about the pros and cons of sleeping with Edge.

“Charlize?” I look over at my mom who motions that she needs to take a phone call. I nod as I stand at the counter getting ready to print out our sales.

“Holy mother of God.” Cindy drops a cup. I look over as she stands frozen, eyes wide, and I frown.

“You okay?”

She doesn’t move; her eyes do though.

“Oh my God,” Dolly breathes out, causing Doug to look up.

“Well, motherfucker, there really is a fairy godmother.” Doug shakes his head as if he’s seeing things.

My eyes scan the room and whatever has my friends freaked seems to have captured the whole counter’s interest. Goose bumps form on my arms as I try to catch my breath… Oxygen thief.

Strong hands wrap around my waist pulling me back into his hard frame.