Love Online

“Promise me you won’t tell Eden.”

“Well, that depends on what it is.”

“You can’t tell Eden,” he insisted.

“Okay. Okay. What’s going on?”

“I think I’m bleeding.”

“Bleeding? Well, then you need to tell your sister.”

“I can’t!”

“Why not?”

“I was…touching myself. My, um, penis. Because it felt good. I do that sometimes. And I think I went too far. I felt something come out of there. I think it’s blood. There was a lot of it. It was sort of…hot.”

Oh shit.

I had to sit down on a bench.

Damn.

Isn’t he a little young for that?

Nah. I was about twelve when it happened to me.

Ollie is eleven and a half.

Shit.

Alright.

Just to confirm, I asked, “Did this stuff come out when you finished doing what you were doing?”

“Yes. Right at the end.”

I took a deep breath and rubbed my eyes, silently laughing a little. “Ollie, listen, you’re fine, okay? There is absolutely nothing wrong with you.”

At that moment, one of the board members came through the revolving doors. He must have been looking for me.

“There you are. We’re all waiting for you. I’ve got a tee time at four, so—”

“I need a minute,” I barked. “I’ll be in there soon.”

He looked annoyed as he nodded and went back inside.

“Sorry about that. Okay, so as I was saying, what you did is completely okay. Totally normal.”

“Why was I bleeding, then?”

“It wasn’t blood. It’s something else called semen.”

“Demon?”

“Semen. It’s something that comes out of your penis after you finish doing what you were doing.”

“But it’s not normal. It’s never happened to me before. And I’ve been doing this for, like, six months.”

“Once it happens the first time, it happens every time. It starts around puberty. So this was just your first time, or maybe the first time you noticed it or something. It means you’re getting older.”

“You bleed every time you do it?”

“Yes. Well, not exactly. Again, semen is not blood. It’s different—it’s sort of a whitish color. Blood is red. I know you don’t know the difference, but they’re different substances. And it doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you. Just the opposite. It means your body is working the way it’s supposed to.”

“So what do I do?”

“You don’t have to do anything. But when you know you’re gonna…you know, finish next time, make sure you have a towel handy. And know that Eden’s probably gonna figure it out if she does your laundry.”

“I was really scared,” he said. “I thought I was dying.”

I chuckled. “No, buddy. You’re good.” Then it hit me. “Don’t they have health class at your school? They should be teaching you this stuff.”

“Next year.”

“Okay. Well, if you have any questions, you can come to me.”

“I Googled bloody penis and got scared.”

“Oh, man. Yeah. Don’t do that. I can imagine the stuff that came up.”

“Anyway, thanks, Ryder.”

“It’s no problem at all. You got me out of a stressful work meeting. I needed to take a break from my problems anyway.”

If the people upstairs in the meeting only knew what I was out here discussing.

I was just about to let him go when he asked, “Can I help you with your problem since you helped me with mine?”

That made me smile. “I wish.”

“Does it have to do with your dad?”

I looked up at the sky. “Yeah, buddy, it does. When my dad died, he left me with the power to make some decisions about how his company should be run. And without him here, I’m not sure what to do, not sure what he would have wanted.”

“Ask an adult for help.”

“What?”

“That’s what my teacher always says. When you’re really stuck, ask an adult for help.”

“You do realize I am an adult, right?”

“Yeah, but there’s got to be someone who knows more than you, who can help you. Like, an even bigger adult.”

A few seconds passed, and then something in my brain clicked. His words struck a chord.

Of course.

Of course!

Why hadn’t I thought of this sooner? I couldn’t do this alone. I never could. The answer on how to proceed wasn’t going to come from me or any of those fools upstairs; they were only in it for themselves. There was only one person who could help me. And I was going to have to beg him.

Ask an adult.

“Ollie, you’re brilliant, you know that?”

“Sometimes I am. But I thought I was bleeding demons out of my pee pee. So, not all of the time.”***“Thank you for meeting me,” I said.

Benny’s father, Benjamin Eckelstein, Sr., led me out to his back patio where a pitcher of lemonade sat on the table. He wore a white tennis uniform. I’d called him right after hanging up with Ollie and asked if I could meet him at his house this afternoon.

“Of course, son. I’ve been expecting to hear from you.”

That surprised me. “Really?”

He put his hand on my shoulder. “Yes, but I didn’t want to be presumptuous in assuming you needed my help. If you didn’t ask, I wasn’t going to offer. I figured you were waiting for the dust to settle a little.”