Alexei (Chicago Blaze 5)

Hell, everything with Graysen is my favorite. And even though there are many reasons I’m staying sober, one of the biggest reasons is her. Every time she tells me something from her past that her shit father did while drunk, I’m grateful she never actually witnessed me intoxicated. I was a fun drunk, but it doesn’t matter—drunkenness triggers her apprehension and I don’t ever want to put her in a position to question my commitment to this relationship.

She hugs me extra tight as we part ways, and I miss her as soon as she walks away to catch the El Train.

I offered to buy her a car, but with traffic as bad as it is in the city, she said she wants to stick with Uber and the train. She won’t even let me drive her to work because she says morning train rides are her ritual. It’s her time to catch up on reading material for work.

I don’t mind the traffic, though. My license was suspended for six months after I was charged with the DUI, but luckily I was able to start that suspension during the months I was in rehab. I pull my new Audi SUV out of my building’s parking garage and head for my meeting, listening to the sports talk radio station and drinking my second cup of coffee on the way to my AA meeting.

As I stand before the AA group gathered today and say, “I’m Alexei, and I’m an alcoholic,” I no longer feel ashamed of the words. I’m an alcoholic who’s been sober for an entire year. It’s my biggest accomplishment in life—more than anything I’ve achieved playing hockey.

After the meeting, I put my one-year sobriety chip in my pocket, planning to add it to my collection later. Then I head for O’Hare, where I’m flying out with the team for our game in Denver, Colorado.

The team owner, Olivier Durand, is traveling with us. He gives me a wave as he sees me approaching the group, and when he finishes his conversation with Jonah, he comes over to shake my hand.

“How are you, Alexei?”

“Doing great, how are you?”

He smiles. “Excited, to be honest. I don’t get to travel with the team often, and it’s one of my favorite things to do.”

“Listen, I never properly thanked you for what you’ve done for me, so…thank you.”

“You’ve thanked me on the ice with your stats, but I appreciate the verbal thanks as well.”

“I wouldn’t be playing hockey anymore if you hadn’t stuck your neck out for me like you did.”

His expression turns serious. “Have you thought about your future in hockey? I don’t think we’ll be able to offer you a first line spot anytime soon, but we’d love to keep you on our second line as long as you want to be here. I know you can earn more and play on a first line elsewhere, though.”

“No, I plan to stay here if you want to keep me on your roster. I’ve got plenty of money saved and I’m incredibly happy here.”

“That’s great news.” He gives me a knowing grin. “Does that decision have anything to do with the girlfriend of yours I heard about from Anton?”

“Yeah, definitely. And the team, too.”

“They’re a fantastic bunch,” he says. “The best.”

“I think going through projectile vomiting and projectile diarrhea together brought us all closer together,” I quip.

Durand throws his head back as he lets out a loud laugh. “I’ve heard some war stories about that day. Anton said he genuinely thought he was going to die.”

“I haven’t eaten Chinese food since that day, and I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to again.”

We’re called to board, and I take my seat next to Easy. Me, him and Kit Cooper have become a tight, solid second line. Easy’s French-Canadian, and he’s definitely the only refined gentleman in our group. Easy speaks English and French, while Kit and I speak English and profanity.

“Where’s the token?” Kit asks, looking around from his seat in front of us.

“It’s a chip,” I say, pulling my one-year sobriety chip out to show them.

“Nice,” he says, holding up his fist for a bump.

“Great job,” Easy says, looking up from his phone.

“You okay, man?”

He shakes his head. “A friend of mine from college was just in a bad car accident. It’s not looking good.”

“Oh shit, I’m sorry.”

“Thanks. He’s got a wife and kids. I’m devastated for them.”

“Anything I can do?”

“No, but thank you. I have to get my mindset on tonight’s game, but I don’t know how.”

“If you think of anything I can do, let me know.”

He nods, looking back down at his phone.

Our flight takes off and I’m still thinking about Easy’s friend. Life’s so damn unfair sometimes and unpredictable. I pull out my phone then, texting Graysen just to let her know I’m thinking of her.