After Burn (Lost Kings MC 10)
“Yeah,” I agree.
We’re finally called into a room and I follow her with a hand on her back. Can’t keep my hands off her. No, I have the urge to wrap her up in soft blankets and carry her everywhere.
“This is so embarrassing,” she mutters as she emerges from the bathroom in a thin hospital gown.
“Why? I know you inside and out, Hope.” Her cheeks turn pink and I lean down, brushing my lips against her ear. “I spend as much time inside your pussy as humanly possible. You don’t have anything to hide from me.”
She chuckles softly as I boost her up onto the lightly padded table. She shifts as the paper crinkles under her and rearranges her gown. “Yes, but there isn’t usually a doctor and an ultrasonic wand up my hoo-ha involved.” She gestures toward the end of the table and shudders. “Or stirrups.”
One corner of my mouth slides up and I pat the table. “I kind of like this. Maybe I’ll put one downstairs.” I stroll to the end pretending to inspect the equipment. Her gaze follows me and I wink at her. “Set up like this will give me easy access.”
“Gross,” she sputters through her laughter. “I had no idea you had some medical kink lurking under all your badassery.”
“I have a Hope kink,” I correct, throwing her another teasing smile. “Any way I can get you.”
Her eyes gloss over and she holds out her hands. “I love you, Rock.”
“Love you too, baby doll.” I take her hands and pull her against my body, wrapping her up in my arms. The sweet scent of whatever shampoo she’s using this week fills my nose and I bury my face in her hair, finding my way to her neck where I kiss and nibble her skin until she’s laughing again.
“Good morning, Ms. Kendall,” the doctor greets with a bright smile as she bustles in through the door, closing it behind her. I back away a few inches and the doctor smiles even wider. “Mr. North, I’m so glad she finally brought you.”
Well, at least Hope must have made it clear I wasn’t some asshole who didn’t want to be here with her.
“Is everything okay?” I blurt out, realizing the whole time I’ve been trying to tease Hope to keep her mind occupied, I’ve also been trying to calm myself.
I’m scared shitless.
“We should find out today. We didn’t find what we wanted on last week’s ultrasound. This test should tell us one way or another.”
My heart plummets. This might not have a happy ending after all.
The thoughts racing through my head must be evident on my face. Hope squeezes my hand. “This will tell us if the baby’s in the right place or…” She drops her gaze.
A technician joins us in the cramped room.
“I see what could be something right there.” The doctor stares at the screen. “Well that wasn’t hard to find today.” She points to a black speck in the middle of the screen. “See the white area around it? That tells us it’s a true pregnancy.”
The technician moves. “Here’s a different angle.”
The doctor nods and points to the little bean again. “There’s your little bean. Right in the uterus where it should be,” the doctor says, pointing at the screen to fuzzy white jelly-bean-sized speck.
Hope bursts into a combination of tears and laughter and covers her mouth with her hand. “That’s our baby?”
“That’s your baby,” the doctor confirms.
My lungs seize and my hold on Hope’s hand tightens. I run my free hand over my chin as I stare at the monitor.
Ours.
Our baby.
“Everything looks good.”
“Oh thank God,” Hope breathes out.
“How far… when?” I croak out.
The doctor shrugs. “By the size, I estimate five weeks, three days.” She taps the numbers into the computer and gives us an estimated due date.
I ask a few questions that make Hope blush, which the doctor answers honestly and with a straight face.
Finally, we’re almost ready to go.
“This is good news today,” the doctor says. “But I still need to see you in a couple days for more bloodwork. You’re still a high risk pregnancy,” the doctor reminds Hope.
I take Hope’s hand and squeeze.
We have to go next door so Hope can have blood drawn. She holds on tight to my hand and closes her eyes the whole time.
Only then does it hit me the enormity of what she’s about to go through. For us.
When we return to her doctor’s office, her doctor hands me a pamphlet and winks.
I glance at the blue and white lettering on the front. “Pregnancy Sex: Seven Positions For Her Comfort.”
Hope laughs and shakes her head. “Well, I guess I know what we’ll be doing later,” she whispers.
“Damn right.”
While she schedules the next appointment, I take out my phone to make sure I can be with her.
“You don’t have to come every time,” Hope says on our way out.
“Yes. I do. And I will.” My tone leaves no room for discussion. “I don’t want you coming here alone for any reason.”
I help her into the truck and get in on the other side. Before I start it up, I stop and look at her.
“Rock,” she says softly, resting her hand on my knee. “I know how close we are to everyone, but I want to keep this to ourselves just a little longer.”
Love expands in my chest, filling every space. The love for my wife. The love for the life we created. My desire to give Hope anything and everything she needs burns stronger than ever. I grab her hand lifting it and kissing her fingertips. “Sounds like a plan.”
She relaxes, sitting back and closing her eyes.
“Are you okay?”
“Just tired.”
The frustration—anger’s too strong of a word—of her leaving me in the dark for so long returns. I let go of her hand and she places it over her stomach. Unsure of what else there is to say, I let her sleep for the short drive.
We’ll have our talk when we get home.
The absence of moving wakes me as Rock parks the truck in the club’s garage. He throws a glance at the clubhouse before opening my door and helping me out.
Even though it’s the middle of the day, it’s quiet at the property. Nothing but leaves rustling in the light breeze and the random hawk searching for prey breaks the air.
We walk home hand in hand. Rock’s quiet. I think his silence has to do with making sure I make it safely over every pebble and pine cone in our way.
The ominous thud of the door closing behind us when we step into the house suggests his silence has more to do with something else. Still groggy, I stand there while he strips my coat from my shoulders and hangs it in the closet.
Exhausted, I turn to go upstairs.
“Where are you going?” Rock asks. His low voice holds something other than curiosity.
“I want to change.”
He doesn’t answer, and I continue upstairs. As my hand touches my closet door, he steps into the room. “You think we’re done with this?” he asks.
“With what?” I can’t see him because I’m lifting my shirt over my head, but after I fling it in my closet, he’s right in front of me.
Staring down at my body.
Breathing hard.
Taking every inch of me in.
He reaches out and shuts the closet door.
“Rock, I wasn’t—”
“Yes you are.”
Something isn’t quite right and I take a step back. He follows until the backs of my legs hit the bed and I’m trapped.
“Take your pants off.”
“Well, I was trying to—”
He doesn’t wait for me to finish. He reaches out, hooking his fingers into the waistband and yanking my jeans open. Roughly, he shoves them down my legs and I kick them off.
“Get on the bed.”
“Rock, I—”
His eyes close and he takes a deep breath. “I love you, but I’m still furious with you. I can’t decide if I want to fuck you or spank you.”
Heat races over my skin for several reasons. Shame, because I know damn well why he’s so angry. Desire for my husband who’s the epitome of sex. Embarrassment that both options dampen my panties.
“Do I get a vote?”
“No.” He takes another step, so we’re pressed up tight against each other. His arms band around me, keeping me from falling back on the bed. He places both palms against my ass and squeezes. Despite how furious he claims to be, he feathers the softest kiss over my lips.
“You’re everything to me, Hope,” he almost whispers the words as he touches his forehead to mine. “I can’t lose you.”
“You heard the doctor—”
“That’s not all I’m talking about. We tell each other everything. I don’t want to lose us.”
“You’re happy about the baby?” I finally ask, because deep down, even though I know he’ll be a wonderful father, I also know he was content with our life the way it is… was.
“So happy, baby doll. I won’t lie to you, though, I’m worried.”
“I know. That’s why I waited until we could—”
“Yeah, about that.”
Damn, I should have kept my mouth shut.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
I can’t even be angry at Hope. I love her too fucking much and I understand why she waited to tell me. Love her for it, even if I wish she’d told me so she wasn’t going through it alone.
She has never looked more beautiful.
“Come here.” I hold out my hand and she takes it. Her breath hitches when I yank her closer and swing her up into my arms.
“What are you doing?”
I press a kiss to her forehead and carry her into the bathroom. Setting her down in front of the tub. “What’s this?”