Rhythm of the Road (Lost Kings MC 16)

She laughs softly. “I couldn’t tell. You looked fabulous, honey. I’m so proud.”

“I flubbed a line or two but kept right on going.” Just like you taught me.

“Good job, Shelbs.”

While she goes on about showing the video to everyone at the restaurant we both wait tables at back home, I nibble on my thumbnail debating whether I should ask her opinion on the cards or not.

“So…” I pick up the Lovers card and tap it against my notebook a few times before setting it off to the side. “I did a reading this morning…”

“Do tell.”

That eagerness in her voice won’t last long. “I, uh…”

It was a good reading. Rooster and I have a shot. That’s the only way to interpret the cards that makes any sense. Why am I’m struggling to follow my own intuition? Why am I seeking my mother’s approval when I know she’ll never give it?

“Shelby?” she prompts.

I relay the cards and their positions.

Momma’s silence on the other end tells me all I need to know about her interpretation of the cards and her opinion. “What were you asking, Shelby?”

“Rooster and I talked last night. We were makin’ plans…I wanted to be sure…”

She sighs. “Now isn’t the time.”

“That’s kinda what I was asking. Where is this relationship headed?”

“Shelby,” she says in a more forceful tone, “I like Rooster. He’s lovely to look at—”

“He’s more than that, Momma.” A spark of anger fires me up. “Yesterday you seemed happy I was gonna see him.”

“Sure. Thought you’d shake the sheets, have some fun, not plan a future with him.”

“We’re not planning a future.” Not really. “We talked about him coming to visit me on the road more. He understands how important this is to me.”

“He’ll say that now, but next thing you know, you’ll be gettin’ knocked up—”

“Jesus, Momma,” I snap. “I know how birth control works.”

“Sometimes that don’t matter.”

I squeeze my eyes shut and rub my throbbing temple. “You should’ve seen how sweet he was yesterday, helping me out, lookin’ after me at the meet-and-greet when some grabby-handed jerk decided to help himself to an ass squeeze, recordin’ that video and sending it to you—”

“How’d he feel ’bout you singing with Dawson? Can’t imagine that went over well.”

“He was fine with it. Hells bells, Dawson’s old enough to be my dad.”

She scoffs. “Not quite.”

“Rooster understood it was a big deal for me.”

“This ain’t the time to be off wool gatherin’. You lose your heart to some bossy biker, you’ll be giving up everything you’ve worked for your whole life.”

Too late. I lost the battle for my heart the day Rooster fished me out of the San Antonio River.

“A man like that won’t tolerate his woman running all over the country for months at a time,” she continues. “And how’re you gonna trust him not to screw around behind your back while you’re on the road? You don’t need the distraction right now, Shelby.”

“Love’s not a choice, Momma,” I whisper. “I can’t make it happen when it’s convenient.”

“Baby, there are plenty of men out there. You’re young, beautiful, talented. You’ll fall in love when it’s the right time.” She completely ignores what I said. “You got an itch, scratch it with some of those nice boys showin’ up with flowers after your shows. What about Trent? He’s been cow eyed forever over ya.”

“’Cause I can’t get knocked up tearin’ up the sheets with every guy who looks at me sideways? You’re not making sense.”

“I get it. You’re young. Full of hormones.”

“Dammit, Momma! I’m not some cat in heat who can’t control herself.”

She’s silent on the other end.

“I’ve sacrificed so much for you, Shelby. Your whole life. Gave up everything for you. And your father.” She spits out the last word. “You want to end up like me? A forty-year-old waitress?”

“There’s nothin’ wrong with honest work. And you could still sing if—”

“Those days are gone for me. Don’t make my same mistakes.”

“I’m not.” It sure gets old having her refer to me as a mistake.

“You’re so stubborn. Always have been.”

“That’s not true.”

“Use that stubbornness to make your dreams come true, Shelby. Not to fight me.”

“I’m on this tour, aren’t I?”

“Good. Now, I love you. When’s your next show?”

There’s no point fighting. She’s made up her mind and expects me to fall in line. “Tomorrow night.”

“Rooster’s taking you?”

“Yup,” I answer with a note of defiance.

“Is it your last show in New York?”

“Yes, why?”

“Then when you’re finished, say goodbye and be done with him before your hearts get anymore entangled.”

My burst of defiance gives way to defeat. “Sure.”

“Love you, Shelby. Let me know how the next show goes.”

“Bye, Momma.” I almost choke on the lump in my throat. “Love you too.”

“I’m sorry if I seem harsh, Shelby. But trust me on this. You can’t depend on anyone but yourself. Rooster will say all sorts of things now. Heck, he’ll probably mean every word. But men can’t change their nature. You don’t need a man to be happy.”