Deep (Stage Dive 4)

“Ow,” he said, sort of contemplatively.

David just laughed.

“Crap. Are you all right?” I asked, trying to push the hair back from his face to see, while keeping him upright and hopefully safe from further harm. “Ben?”

“He’s fine. Dude has the hardest head I’ve ever seen. One time when we were kids we got stoned up on the roof of my house. Ben walked straight off the edge. We were all freaking out, but by the time we got down there he’d already gotten on his bike and headed home. The big idiot’s basically indestructible.” David directed us toward the side of the bed. “Okay, let him go.”

I did so, and the father of my unborn child toppled face-first onto the mattress. At least that had to be a soft landing. Still, he lay there completely unmoving, apart from the rebound of the springs. God, I hoped we hadn’t accidentally killed him. If we had, at least the neglect wasn’t willful.

I grabbed one of his sneakers and gave it a shake. “Ben, are you still breathing?”

A groan from the man on the bed. Not too bad, as signs of life went.

“Don’t worry,” said David. “He’s fine. Just let him sleep it off.”

I nodded, still frowning just the same.

“You right with him?” asked David, hands on his hips. “I can send Sam over if you like. He’s finished babysitting Mal from what I hear.”

“No need, thanks. Is he all right? Mal?”

He gaze softened. “Passed out just like this one, apparently.”

Seriously, such a mess. Anne and Mal would probably never talk to me again. Well, Anne would, but she was my sister, so she had to forgive me eventually. Mal was another situation entirely. The thought of losing his high opinion and easy affection bit deep. Consequences were a bitch. Realistically, however, I couldn’t imagine myself having done any differently even if I’d known Mal and Anne would be pissed. I mean, I’d already known that and it didn’t even make me pause. Fewer star-crossed lovers and more adults should be allowed to date who they wanted.

Maybe if I’d known the night would result in the bean … I don’t know. There was only one thing I was sure of: sex equaled nothing but chaos and confusion. It was official.

I squeezed my eyes shut. “You must hate me.”

David’s brow wrinkled up. “What? Why?”

“For causing all this trouble.” The urge to flail was huge, but I restrained it. For now. Instead, I got busy wriggling Ben’s shoes off his feet. No way were they making contact with my sheets.

“I’m assuming you didn’t have to hold a gun to Ben’s head to get him to fuck you?” The guy watched me unblinking, face dead serious.

“Um, no.”

David shrugged. “There you go.”

“Isn’t that taking a slightly overly simplistic view of the situation?”

He smiled. “In my experience, shit usually is pretty simple when you get right down to it. When it comes to matters of the heart, you decide where you belong and you go be there. Simple. Ben wanted to be here. Don’t think I didn’t try to talk him out of it, either. The bastard insisted.”

Maybe. “Wonder what his new girlfriend would make of your theory.”

“Yeah.” He winced, his mouth widening in imagined pain. “I’ll leave that one up to you two to sort out. But try not to stress. Can’t be good for Ben junior.”

“Right.” I rolled my eyes and dropped Ben’s shoe on the floor. “But how is this going to affect the band, the two of them fighting?”

It took him a long time to answer. “I honestly don’t know.”

Fuck.

“Night. I’ll lock the door on my way out.” He raised a hand in salute. “Call Ev if you need anything.”

“Thanks, David.”

The front door clicked closed behind him, leaving me alone with Ben. He lay passed out sideways across my queen-size bed. Ben was in my actual bed. Holy hell. I didn’t quite know what to do with that information. A pity there was nothing but boxes and junk in the spare room. Not that I didn’t want him near. My heart wasn’t so sensible. It was just time for me to start taking the safer option when it came to him. Past time even.

“Hey.” I leaned over the mattress, giving his leg a shake. “Roll over.”

A moan.

“Come on, big boy. Move it. You’re taking up all the bed.”

Incoherent muttering.

This was not working, and like hell I’d be sleeping on the love seat. I pulled off a sock and tugged on his big toe. “Ben. Wake up.”

In slow motion, he stirred, lifting his shaggy head and looking around.

“Roll over.”

“Wha—” He turned, easing himself up and over, as requested. He blinked and grimaced and looked generally displeased with the world. A lumpy red line bisected his forehead. Whatever David said, that had to hurt. “Lizzy?”

“Got it in one.”

“How’d I get here?”

“David just dropped you off, remember?”

He scratched at his beard. “Uh. Okay.”

“You need to move, you’re taking up all of the room.”

Bewildered, he rose up on his elbows and took a look around. “This your bed?”

“Yes.”

“Did we…” He raised an eyebrow suggestively.

“No, I already learned my lesson, thank you very much.”

“You sure?” He gave me a wonky smile. “It could be fun.”

“Yeah, you look like you’ve had enough fun for the both of us for one night, buddy.”

“Maybe.” He contemplated the thin cotton of my shirt for a good long while, one corner of his mouth moving upward. “Hey, you’re not wearing a bra.”

“Shut up and move, Ben.”

A groan. “All right.”

It took him about forever to wriggle and roll and finally get his big fat head up on the pillow. On my favored side, damn it. Whatever. I lie down on my back beside him, keeping a nice, fun, celibate distance between our two bodies just in case he decided to try and get some. More sleep would be so great. To grow the bean, I really needed rest. My limbs were weighed down with lethargy, my head full of blergh.

“We could cuddle,” he suggested, the words slurred, blurring together into one dumb drunken idea. Man, if he’d been even one inch sober I’d be all over him. A hug right now, letting me know everything would be okay, sounded sublime. A silly, childish wish, I know. Things were complicated enough. “I wouldn’t try nothing, swear.”