Cowboy Daddy (The Single Brothers 4)

The reading was to be at the lawyer’s office. I’d been there once already, so it was no trouble finding my way there. I was impatient throughout the whole reading until I heard the lawyer say that everything had been left to me. It was only then that I looked up and realized my brother wasn’t there. I felt like cursing, and I gave him a call afterward. I had to call twice before he picked up.

“Hey, Noah,” I said hesitantly, wondering about how to break the news to him.

It turned out, I didn’t need to.

“I know the reading was today,” he said brusquely. “The lawyer called, but I didn’t think I needed to be there. It’s all yours anyway, right?”

I sighed. “I’ll split everything with you if you want,” I offered. “It’s not fair that I…”

“It’s fine,” he said, speaking to me. “Don’t bother, Jason. Goodbye.”

I couldn’t help but think just how final that goodbye had sounded.

Chapter Ten

Rachel

There was no word from Jason for a few days. It was to be expected, after his little stop at my place, but why did it hurt me so much? Because he’d misunderstood something? And he’d walked away without letting me explain, while I let him walk away without speaking up a bit more firmly. I’d done it just fine on the ranch. But, I hadn’t been vulnerable there. That had been him.

It wasn’t quite that the tables had turned, but more than they were back to rights, and I hated it that way.

You were going to tell him anyway, I thought to myself. At some point.

That didn’t make me feel any better, though.

I kept wondering if he needed help, but I didn’t have the courage to go and look for him to ask. Just like it had always been between us. Jason walked, and I was more often than not too afraid to reach for his back, and he left.

I wondered if that would ever change about us.

When another surprise knock came to my door, I was more prepared. Still, it was a surprise to open the door and see Jason standing right there. I would have thought he’d remain pissed at me since it had taken him this long. The last time he got pissed at me, he was gone long enough for me to have my son and spend a little time with him, before going back to work. Nathan knew all about him, my boy. He’d helped me out when I had no idea what I was going to do on my own with a child. He’d met him a few times. I knew it was partly because of the both of us that he’d called Jason back home so insistently. He’d wanted Jason to do right by the two of us, even though I’d said over and over that I didn’t have a problem with it.

Now here Jason was, and I couldn’t help but be glad to see him. Still, I acted reserved.

“Hello, Jason.”

The bags were back under his eyes, even though it hadn’t been that long. His shoulders were slumped, and he looked like a defeated man. Nothing like the Jason I remembered.

“Hi, Rachel,” he said, sounding drained.

“Would you like to come in?” I offered, stepping aside.

He didn’t hesitate, walking past me and to the living room, where he dropped onto the couch.

“I’m sorry for intruding,” he murmured.

I chuckled a little. “Jason, apologizing? Isn’t that a new one,” I muttered to myself.

He heard me, by the way he winced and looked up at me, all apologetic even as he still looked more exhausted.

“It was my mistake, of course, I have to apologize. Especially when I told you off for butting into my shit. I was out of line last time. I’m sorry, Rachel.”

His saying the words once was surprising enough, he even repeated it. Jason wasn’t the kind of guy that apologized for who he was, or how he did things. It was truly strange to hear.

“It’s fine,” I murmured, fidgeting in place, wondering if I should sit down or offer him something. I couldn’t decide. Then I changed the topic quickly. “How’s the ranch been doing?” I asked.

He laughed grimly. “What do you think? You can just see me and tell, can’t you? I’m a mess, Rachel. I thought I was picking things up, but that was a lie. It was more like I was helping out and you were running the whole ranch.”

I wanted to refuse and say it wasn’t true. But he must have come here for something.

“What did you need?” I asked, though I already knew.

He gave me a tired smirk. “Help, Rachel,” he said bluntly. “Yours. I’m willing to offer some in return if I can. With the child, maybe?” he offered hesitantly, wincing.

More things I hadn’t expected. Jason is the first to ask for help, instead of just accepting it. And Jack…

“You don’t have to push yourself, Jason,” I told him.

He just shrugged. “I don’t see it as pushing myself. I know…we don’t have the best past. A lot of it—well, all of it, was my fault. I wanted to…try and forget. Start over. By helping each other out. If you need to, I can keep paying you for the work.”

I shot my eyebrows up. “You’ve been paying me to work?”

He chuckled. “Well. I know you haven’t received anything yet, but yes. You can think of this as a job if you need to.”

A job… I needed one. It was just hard to find. Nathan had given me plenty of that while I was in between jobs, I could help out on the ranch in exchange. It didn’t mean anything.

Besides, I needed the cash. Nathan had left me some money, more than what I’d worked for, but it wouldn’t hurt to save it up. And I wasn’t used to staying idle, either, just being at home with a toddler full-time.

“I would love to,” I said honestly, feeling my body relax as I gave him a grin. I moved to one of the chairs across from him and sat down, my arms around myself. “I have to admit, though, it’s a surprise that you’re coming around this fast.”

Jason gave a twisted smile. “I’m not all that reliable, huh?”

“No, no,” I said quickly. “Just…decisive. Turning back on your decisions isn’t always easy for you, no matter what it’s about.”

He hummed. He pushed himself off the couch, stretching out his arms.

“Why don’t we head over to the ranch now?” he said. “I’ll drive you. I think everyone is starting to miss you.” He hesitated a bit, before adding, “The child can come to.”

Jason was suddenly so accommodating that I didn’t know whether to be suspicious of it or not. I went to my son after packing a quick bag for him.

“Hey, there, Jack,” I murmured as I picked him up and rocked him a little. “Do you think Daddy knows the truth about you? Huh?”

Could that be why he changed his mind so quickly?

Chapter Eleven

Jason

Rachel and I were back to working on the farm together; there were just a few differences. For one, she stayed over with her son. The ranch hands had been happy to see her back, as well as the other workers in the house. It hadn’t been a lie when I said she was missed.

I had missed her, too. I was just too much of a coward to tell her outright.

With her there with me, everything was back in order and according to plan. It was strange, sometimes when I heard the toddler cry, or I saw him with her, and I’d think that he was my son.

This must be what Grandpa meant about me taking responsibility, I thought. I’d had other things on my mind at the time. I felt another fresh wave of guilt, as I realized just how stupid I’d been.

After finishing up some work in the fields, I made some lunch for just Rachel and I. The other hands and employees could find their food. I couldn’t hear the boy crying and guessed Rachel had already set him down in one of the bedrooms. She’d been insistent on the one right next to her own, and I’d understood she didn’t want the toddler too far, so I had no problem agreeing. It was also near the office, so it worked out.

I went there then, and I found

her on her own. She was bent over some papers, work that I was technically supposed to be doing. After a moment, I knocked on the doorjamb, and she looked up.

“Oh, Jason,” she said, smiling. “Can I do something for you?”

“I was wondering if you could join me for lunch.”

She looked surprised, then pleased. “I didn’t realize it was that late already. Just give me one sec?”

She looked back down at the papers she’d been looking through, noted some things down quickly, then got up and rounded the desk.

“Can I ask what we’re having?” she asked, curious. “Or is it a surprise?”

“Not a surprise per se,” I said slowly as we walked out of the office. “But I’m hoping they’re all still your favorites.”

There was a look of absolute delight on her face, and I couldn’t help feeling a little proud that I was the one to put it there.

I led the way back downstairs and to the kitchen, over to the dining table already set with food. I’d set only two spots, so she would know no one else would be joining us. I watched her closely, but she didn’t seem to mind.

Good. The last thing I wanted was for her to hate me, after all.

“You didn’t have to do all this,” she said as she sat, though her smile was wider and she was looking at the food like she couldn’t wait to try it all. “You could have left the cook handle it. And don’t even try to deny that you didn’t cook all this, because I remember your cooking just fine, Jason.”

I felt something right relax in my chest, and I rubbed a hand over it. I hadn’t even realized I was anxious this whole time, and I smiled easily at her, feeling happy because she looked happy.

Why did I ever let her go? I thought to myself once again. Because now that we were doing this, I could remember just how much better things used to be between Rachel and me, before it all went wrong to the point I just had to walk away.

“Eat,” I prompted, serving my plate and digging in.

I watched as she took a bite, and hummed, her eyes lighting up. She gave me a thumbs up instead of saying it out loud, though I could already tell by the way she was taking in spoon after spoon, barely taking time to chew before eating a little more. She must not have had breakfast because she looked really hungry.