Obsession

For a moment, I don’t know how to respond. I can’t plead, I can’t re-confirm our agreement, I can’t really do anything else but hope he means what he said sincerely.

Maggie and Jasmine are not collateral, they never were.

“It’s my first”, I say.

“Then I know exactly how you feel”, Frank responds.

“Excited and terrified in equal measure.”

“Don’t worry, Liam. You’ll be fine. You’re a fighter, after all. You’ll find a way to make it work. Family is the most important thing in this world, believe me, I know it. Go on, I’ll see you in a month.”

I’m at the door when he calls after me.

“Your debt is your debt, Liam. It has nothing to do with anyone else. If you don’t pay it, it goes away with you, do you understand me?”

I nod. “Yes”, I say.

“You have my word”, Frank adds.

“Thank you, Frank.”

I’m out of the door, and back on the street again before I have a chance to breathe. I’m sweating so much it feels like I’ve just gone twelve rounds with the heavyweight champion of the world. I have no idea what that was all about, but as much as I can tell, Frank is telling me, in the unique way he likes to, that he wishes me well, my family are safe, regardless of what happens, and when I pay off the debt I owe him, that’s it.

The whiskey has made my belly warm and my head swim. I don’t know whether to feel scared or alleviated and I certainly don’t want to tell Jasmine about what’s just gone on, because if she knew that he knew about Maggie, despite his promise she’ll always be safe, she would absolutely flip her lid.

That has got to always stay between me and Frank and when this debt is paid, I might suggest a long vacation just in case.

I’m half way home when my phone rings, more excited than ever to see that it’s Jasmine calling.

Six.

Jasmine

A mini-date in the park on a rare Saturday afternoon off. What better way to seal the future of your families affairs than here, strolling around prospect park on a cool autumn afternoon?

The leaves are already beginning to mulch up underneath the tree, a process of rebirth at it’s very earliest phase.

Liam links his arm in mine, and we walk together, Maggie in her buggy in front of me, the teething ring that Liam has bought her automatically promoted to favorite toy. In his arms, she looks tiny, but relaxed and not a single bit out of place. In his arms, I feel exactly the same way.

“Favorite color?”, he says.

“Blue. Yours?”

“Yellow.”

“That’s cute, the sand and the sea. Alright, favorite drink?”

“Easy, water.”

“That’s so boring”, I say. “Of all of the drinks in the world, you’re going to choose water?”

“Okay, a drink that isn’t water, does coconut water count?”

I give him a nudge with my elbow and he pretends to stumble a bit.

“Favorite film?” I ask.

“Rocky”, he says, without hesitation. And then, “It’s an incredible story about someone who never gave up on what they believed in”, because I give him a look that suggests I didn’t expect him to say that. “Yours?”

“The Matrix”, I say. “Because of Keanu Reeves and not despite him, that’s very important.”

“I like that film too”, he says.

“What else?” I ask.

“Okay, I’ve got one, favorite sexual position?”

“That’s so immature”, I say, even though I love that he’s asking. “Are you horny?” I add.

“You ever fucked in the park before?”

I give him a look that suggests I’m not prepared to answer that question yet.

“Weirdest place you’ve had sex then?” he asks instead.

“I think you’re horny”, I say.

“It’s been a couple of weeks”, he says.

“Anybody would think you were addicted.”

“I don’t think I need to answer that question.”

We walk for a while and then sit down and get coffee and share a brownie and I feel like for the first time in ages I’m actually living a normal life.

Maggie wakes up and begins to cry and without even asking him, Liam goes straight to her buggy, takes her out and puts her over his shoulder.

“Where did you learn that?” I ask.

“I’m a natural”, he says. “And I’ve been reading. You told me to read up on babies, so I read up on babies. They are gross, horrible things.”

We laugh together.

“Seriously”, he adds. “Mother nature, or whatever the fuck you want to call it, the process of procreation is really disgusting.”

“It’s beautiful too, Liam”, I say, even though I know he knows it.

“You think she needs her diaper changed?” Liam asks.

“You tell me, you’re the expert.”

I change her out here on the table, firstly because I don’t give a shit and secondly so that Liam can see for the next time he does it. He looks fascinated by the process rather than repulsed, which I suppose is a good sign.

“Still want in?” I ask.

“Shit and piss and boogers included, I want in”, he says.

“Then give me a kiss and show me that you mean it”, I demand, already thinking about something else entirely.

“Gotcha”, Liam says. “Not the only one who’s horny then.”

“Just kiss me, you idiot”, I say.

Liam sweeps me up off my feet and there,

in the middle of prospect park, gives me the best kiss I’ve ever had in my life. Seriously. I know it’s just a kiss but through those lips, I can feel how much he wants me. Actually, not only how much he wants me because that alone would be trite, but how much he will fight for me, commit himself to me, lose himself in me and give everything over to me as unselfishly and altruistically as he can.

I am his plan now, and my plan, whatever it was before, has suddenly got more focused.

This is it. Whatever problems that come towards us, we fight together. Whatever issues or challenges we battle them as a team and not alone. I can’t begin to describe how much that means to me.

I’m a strong, independent woman, but like anyone else on this earth I get lonely. I know now I’ll never need to feel that way again.

“Maggie wants to sleep”, Liam says, raising his eyebrows suggestively.

“You think we should take her home?” I ask.

“I think it might be a good idea”, he says. “You know, just in case she starts to complain.”

I nod, already feeling the heat rising from my crotch and filtering out through my upper body. No single person before him has made me feel horny like Liam instinctively knows how to do.

“Let’s go, quickly”, I say. “And you can show me exactly how you intend to behave from now on.”

With that decided, we are out of the park, and back home to my apartment in what must be record time, while Liam spends most of it hunched over, battling to keep his swelling cock out of the sight of other pedestrians.

Liam

As soon as Maggie is settled down and out of harm’s way, Jasmine allows me to take her to the bedroom.

“If you want to come before she wakes up you better fuck me quickly”, she teases, already halfway out of her clothes.

“If she wakes up and I haven’t come yet, we’ll just have to start all over again”, I say.

“Deal”, Jasmine smiles.

Two weeks is a long time to wait for something you want, especially if there’s even a slight possibility you won’t get it.