The One I Need (Snakes Henchmen MC 2)

Ember is happy and chatting all the way to the clubhouse. I knew she loved Tank but I had no idea just how attached she'd become. I smile to myself, good things are about to happen, I feel it in my bones. Jesus, I haven't felt this light in... Well, ever.

Yes, okay, I'm going to have to give up The Exorcist permanently, completely, but I don't even feel the loss of it. I'll get a job, a real, legal one to fill my time. Plus, since my last job as The Exorcist, I can honestly say I haven't missed it at all. I have so much to keep me occupied, I guess I've finally found my place in the world.

I'm not going to lie, I will never be the perfect housewife. If Tank wants to be with me, then he needs to accept that I am sometimes unpredictable, a little dangerous at times, but I love him, and both he and Ember mean the world to me. They are my home.

I may have once believed that I didn't deserve happiness. Hell, maybe I even believed I wasn't capable of it. But Tank has changed my world. He's made me a stronger person, and I don't mean physically. He made me realize that Ember belongs with me, it doesn't matter how she came to be, she is mine, my world. And when I look at her smiling, clapping her tiny hands, my heart bursts with so much love, and it makes me think about Tank and the way he also stole my heart.

I probably sound like a sappy fuck right now, a stupidly, sappy, in love idiot, but do you know what? For the first time in my life, I don't care. I'm letting the love in and I'm going to give it back. I'll fucking bathe in it!

Pulling into the compound of the Snakes Henchmen clubhouse, I wave at Tiger, the prospect I met when I first arrived here. He nods and opens the gates. He knows who I am. Every fucker here does.

Tank's bike is here, parked in its usual spot next to Jett's. “Da Da!” I chuckle, even my baby recognizes Tank's bike.

I park up, turn off the engine and turn to my baby girl sitting in her car seat beside me. “Ready, baby?”

“Ses!” God, I love how she tries to speak.

Making my way inside, I don't see him anywhere. Although, all eyes are now on me, amused smirks on their faces. “Didn't think we'd be seeing you again so soon.”

“Neither did I, Hammer, but you know how it is.” He smirks and nods his head. “Your brother around?”

“Out back with Jett. He'll be in soon.”

“I'll go find him, we need to talk.”

“Want me to watch little lady?”

“That's okay, she's ready to see her daddy.” I smile at him, he smirks at the fact I just referred to his brother as Ember's daddy. But that's who he is to her now.

As sweet of Hammer as that was, this giant of a man offering to watch my tiny daughter, Ember has other ideas, calling for her daddy, which has every biker and club whore looking at me with confused smirks on their faces. I don't say anything, I simply roll my eyes and walk away.

I need to speak with my father about getting rid of the club whores in this place. They're not needed here. Some of the members have kids that come here. I don't like the thought of those kinds of women around any kind. I don't give a damn what they do with their lives, it's their choice. But the MC owns strip clubs, they should fuck off and work there. It's not like unattached bikers don't frequent the places all the damn time anyway.

I'd be a liar if I said my stomach wasn't churning right now. I'm actually terrified that this isn't going to go the way I want it to.

What if he doesn't want me anymore?

What if I've really ruined everything?

Shit, I can't think like that, I'll throw up. I'm not going to give him the chance to turn me away. He belongs to me as much as I belong to him.

With Ember on my hip, I make my way through the long corridor and toward the back exit. My heart is pounding in all sorts of ways. Every emotion you can think of is going through me right now. I've never been so scared of my heart breaking in my life. Then again, I've never given it away to anyone in order for it get broken the way I'm scared it will right now.

I open the large metal safety door and instantly I see Jett and Tank standing to the right, deep in conversation. Jett's eyes meet mine first, a relieved smile spreading across his face, but it's Ember shouting her daddy's name that gets Tank's attention. He swings around, eyes locking with mine for just a second before turning to Ember with a smile on his face. But that look he gave me told me that he's anything but happy to see me.

“Hey, baby girl.” He coos while taking her from me.

She squeals with such happiness while placing her little hands on his face. “Da Da.” His face lights up and he kisses her cheek.

“We need to talk.” He doesn't even acknowledge me, he just keeps hugging Ember and making her laugh as he talks to her.

Does it hurt that he's ignoring me? Fuck yes, it does.

Jett takes my arm and pulls me aside. “You back for good?”

“Depends on Tank.” I shrug and fold my arms around myself. I can feel my stomach hitting my feet. He doesn't want me.

“He's not as angry as you might think he is, Nova. He's relieved that you're here. So am I. Everyone will be.”

I smile at him, my beautiful outlaw biker big brother. “I realized this is where I belong, with my family, with Tank.” I look over at him wistfully. Ember is chuckling at the crazy faces he's pulling at her. He's a wonderful father to her and I don't think he even realizes it. “I need him, Jett.”

My brother kisses my head the way he used to when we were kids and I was scared of something. His way of showing me everything would be all right, he was there, still is.

“Then show him, sis.” He walks away, leaving me with my angry outlaw.

God, Tank's ass looks good in those jeans. Looks better out of them, let me tell you.

Focus, Nova. Jesus!

“Tank? Can we talk?” Nothing. Not one word.

Why doesn't he yell at me, call me names, tell me he doesn't want me anymore?

Anything so that I know where the fuck I stand right now!

Do I deserve to be treated like this? I don't know, maybe.

“Is this really how it ends between us, Tank? You ignoring me, refusing to talk things through?”

My heart is breaking right now, and I ain't ashamed to say that I'm seconds away from walking out of here if for nothing else but to cry so he can't see me.

“I came back because I knew the moment I left it was a mistake. I need you, Tank.”

“Sure you just didn't realize you'd have no one to do your job where Ember's concerned?” He's not looking at me, if he was, he'd see my mouth hanging open in shock. Is that what he really thinks of me? “Don't worry, go live your fucked-up life. You can leave Ember with me, I'll take care of her, we don't need you.”

He's trying to hurt me, I know that, and it's working because he's crushing me inside. But I won't let him talk to me like that! How dare he accuse me of not caring about Ember!

I walk right up to him and snatch my daughter from his arms. He didn't even see me coming, but I guarantee he fuckin' felt my hand connect with his cheek. And it did, so hard it turned his head.

Sonofabitch!

His fiery eyes burn into mine. So much anger radiates off of him, and Ember is screaming in my arms. “How fuckin' dare you say that to me?! How dare you suggest...”

I can't even continue with what I wanted to say. He's really hurt me; how could he say that to me? Making out like I don't care for Ember, that I don't even take care of her myself. Ever since she came back to me, I have cared for her. Yes, I've had a little help, but everybody needs a little of that now and again.

I kiss Ember's head just to stop myself from crying.

“Nova, I didn't mean all of that.”

“Yes, you did.” I adjust Ember on my hip and smile at Tank. “And I won't forgive you for it. I came here to tell you the truth about me, that I'd made a mistake in running, that I came back for you. But instead of listening to me, you tell me what a worthless mother I am to the baby I love more than life itself. Thank you,”

“Nov

a, please.”

“No.” I shake my head and take a step back. I can't do this right now, I'll end up saying something I'll regret and we'll never be fixed. I just need some time on my own to think this through. I know he didn't mean what he said, he was trying to hurt me for leaving him. But still, I'm not going to give in to him that easily. “I have to go.”

“Baby, please don't go, I need you. I love you.” He grabs my face in his hands, I don't pull away, I don't think I'm strong enough. His touch weakens me. “I am so sorry, I was pissed that you left, but I shouldn't've said that stuff. I know you'd never do that to Ember. I know you'd die for her. Please forgive me.”

I roll my eyes because he just keeps on pulling me in. I can't even stay angry with him when I want to! The need for him to hold me is too strong. “If you ever say anything like that to hurt me again, angry or not, I'm gone, Tank.”