All For You (Snakes Henchmen MC 3)

But loving Willow doesn't mean I'll ever forget Cindy or the way we loved each other. And I did love her, she was everything to me. The love we shared was rare. Well, rare in my eyes. I'd never known anything like it. She was my soul mate. When I lost her, I lost half of me.

I never thought I'd start to heal. I never thought my heart would mend. I never thought Willow would be the one to mend it.

I never thought I'd ever feel anything for anyone again after Cindy, but I do. God, I feel so much for Willow. I have to make her see that she belongs with me. And I have to keep her safe, even if it kills me in the process.

Chapter Seven

Willow

We've been riding for almost an hour. I have no idea where he's taking me, but I'm getting a numb butt. I'm holding onto his waist so tightly, I'm scared I'm going to leave bruises on his abs. I'm not scared to be on the back of his bike, I've been on plenty in my life. It's just that I'm so nervous right now. I have no idea what he wants to talk about. Although I'm more than willing to talk about Cindy and my part in her death, I've beat myself up so much over it that I'm exhausted. I am seriously mentally exhausted.

No matter what happens tonight, whether he tells me he wants nothing more to do with me, or that – and I hope – he wants to forgive me so we can both move on, I'm willing to listen to whatever he has to say. The last couple days have been awful. Thinking he hates me hurt so much. I hope more than anything he'll forgive me.

We finally pull up outside the clubhouse. Not that I want to be here right now. He could have taken me to a bar or his place rather than here. And why the hell ride around for an hour before coming here?

Maybe he needed to clear his head and get his thoughts straight first.

He leads me inside, my hand in his. A couple of the guys at the bar yell an hello and wink at me. I smile and roll my eyes.

“Sit down.” I'm not even through the door of his bedroom and he's ordering me to sit down. Why couldn't we have gone to the main room and sat by the fire to talk?

I love this place. I've always loved it. It's like a huge house with many rooms, it's homey and clean. Which probably sounds weird for a bikers clubhouse. But my grandfather made this place a home for the brothers, a place that was theirs. Sure, they drink here, fuck here, even fight sometimes. There's a huge gym, a massive kitchen, the main room is like a huge den, all comfy and cozy, even with the bar at the back of the room. Then there's the actual bar room where most of the parties are held. The guys play pool and darts in there. They laugh and mess around with the club whores.

The place literally has eighteen bedrooms. Yeah, it's that big. The clubhouse has expanded over the years to accommodate the ever-growing club. The higher ranking members who don't have girlfriends and wives have rooms here. Lower members share. My parents have the master bedroom, as is expected of the President and his first lady, even though they have their own house.

The same for BlackJack and Taylor, a big room, I mean. Jack is my dad's best friend and has been in this club almost as long.

Hammer has his own room, it's a nice size. He doesn't have much in here, just his queen bed, a dresser with a lamp that sits on top, and a chair. Hammer has always been minimalistic. He always said that things were just things and they didn't mean anything.

I guess he's right. It's not like material things really matter. All a person needs in this life is the little things. A roof over their heads, something warm to sleep in, clothes to wear. But according to Hammer, a person doesn't need too many of them either.

“Can I get you a drink?”

I shake my head while taking a seat on the only chair in the room.

This has been Hammer's room for as long as I can remember. Yes, he has an apartment a few miles from here, but that's the place he shared with Cindy. They'd only been living together a month before she was killed. He doesn't stay there very often. I guess it feels odd without her. But then, I hate staying at my house now Jordan is gone.

Okay, I sound stupid as he's only been gone a couple weeks. But the place doesn't feel like home to me anymore. I guess I should look for somewhere else, somewhere I don't see his stupid face everywhere I look. Maybe it's time for me to get out of this town and find my perfect home.

“You're awfully quiet.”

I swallow hard while wringing my hands together nervously. I'm not scared of him, I'm just not in the mood to argue. Although, I am nervous about what's going to happen. He was so angry with me the other night, I'm worried he's going to tell me he never wants to see me again. If that's the case, he could have just told me back at Nova's. He didn't need to drag me here to do this.

“Look, I'm sorry about what I said to you, I didn't mean it, Will.” Okay, so he's obviously not angry anymore. He doesn't sound it anyway.

“It's okay,” My voice is too quiet. I cough to clear the fog in my throat.

“No, it's not okay. Look at me, baby girl. Please.” I bite my lip and look at him, leaning back against the dresser. He's such a huge, powerful man, and he's so beautiful. In my eyes, there is no one who could hold a candle to him.

Jordan – Trace – is a handsome man, a very handsome man, but Hammer is rugged, gorgeous. Everything I ever wanted but knew I'd never have.

“What you told me, shocked me, Will. It shouldn't have knowing the two of you were like sisters. Closer sometimes.” He's right, we were. “I never should have said what I said to you.”

“I deserved it.”

“No, baby girl,” I swallow as he comes toward me, his hand held out to me. I look at it for a moment before taking it. He pulls me from my seat. I'm trying not to jump into his arms. I'm trying to be strong, but I don't know how long I can hold my strength.

“You didn't deserve it.” He cups my face in both hands. “I'm sorry, baby girl.” He kisses my forehead. “I'm sorry.” His voice gets quieter with each kiss and each sorry. And his kisses are creeping toward my mouth.

I want him to kiss me, but not like this. I feel guilty. I don't want to feel guilty. I want to be able to kiss him without feeling like I'm hurting Cindy. Yes, I know she's gone from this world, but is she watching us from the next?

He kisses the corner of my mouth and I whimper. I press my hands against his big chest and push as hard as I can until he lets go of me. “Why are you doing this to me?”

“Kissing you? Because,” He grabs my upper arms, pulling me against him again. I can feel his heartbeat against my chest. God, help me to be strong because I don't know if I can resist him as much as I try. “I am done fighting this, Will.”

“What?”

“I need you, Willow. I want you to be mine. My girl.”

“What are you talking about, Hammer? You're not making any sense.” Nothing is making sense to me at all. “Hammer?”

His lips hit mine, and I want to fight, but I can't. I have wanted this for so long. He slides a hand behind my head, holding me in place as his tongue dances erotically with mine. Every part of me is tingling, my legs feel weak with it. I moan so deeply into his mouth that a deep rumble from his chest rips through me all the way to my clit.

I grab at his shirt, pulling him closer, this giant bear of a man, and he deepens the kiss until we're almost tearing at each other. I melt into him. It's like we were meant to be. Something inside of me is telling me

that's exactly what we are, meant to be.

He pulls away gently, resting his forehead against mine. “We can hash this out till the cows come home, baby girl, but the fact is, you're mine, Will. My girl and I won't let you go.”

“I don't want you to let go.”

“This feels right, Will. You and me. I know in my heart Cindy would want us to be together.” He lifts his head and smiles while stroking my cheek with the back of his hand. For the first time in a long time, I see a twinkle in his eye. “We both loved her, but it's time to let her go. It's time for us to move on. Together. You believe that too, don't you?” I do believe that, and that's why I nod my head. He smiles a little wider. It's so good to see him smile like this. “Is that a yes? You'll be my girl?”

I nod my head and giggle, “Yes. Yes!” I wrap my arms around his neck, he lifts me slightly off the floor with his arms around my waist.

This feels right. It really does.

His girl. His old lady.

Old lady, I'm twenty-five.

I never, ever thought this would happen.

But he's my old man now – finally – and I feel so at home.

“As my girl, I need you to do as I ask you.” He says, setting me on my feet. I narrow my eyes at him. “Tomorrow morning, I'm taking you to get my brand on this beautiful body.” I giggle again.

I've never had a tattoo, but I'm really excited about getting the one I have longed for since I was a teenager. The one I didn't get when I was with Jordan. I told him I would as soon as he was a full patched in member. I guess I knew deep down I would never get that tattoo. I did where his leather, though. Which I burned as soon as he left.

“Then I'm taking you to the safe house. I need to know you're safe, baby girl. Tell me you'll go.”