Super Secret Santa

“I thought you were another reporter. They’ve been showing up, or calling, all day. What have you done?” She looked so distraught that I just wanted to take her into my arms and hug her tight, but she was glaring at me and I knew she wouldn’t let me do that. “Is my life a game to you? I had to send Mark to Angela’s to hide him from all this craziness.”

“What? I’m so sorry,” I told her. “All I know is Donna called the Leviathans’ PR machine to complain I was some kind of sick lech, compromising single moms. Maybe she called reporters too.”

“I don’t believe you. You’re trying to change your image at my expense.”

“Are we really back to this? Call Donna. Ask her. I can guarantee this is all her doing. Not mine!”

“Please. Just leave, Neil.”

That was the last thing I wanted to do. I was determined to try to fight for what I wanted, which was her.

“I just want to stay and talk,” I told her. “I swear I don’t have bad intentions.”

Far from it.

This was as into any woman as I’d ever felt, and I didn’t want to lose her.

“You can’t take no for an answer, can you?” she said.

That just made me mad.

How could she not see that this was the real deal?

“You’re scared of how you feel about me,” I pleaded with her. “If this is what you want, Becca, that’s fine, but at least own it. Admit it.”

I felt the anger growing inside me despite my best attempts to quash it.

“Don’t you dare make me into something I’m not,” I told her. “For the second time, mind you. I don’t need this, either. I thought you were special, but you seem to trust everyone over me, and you’re so willing to believe the worst about me.”

Becca stared at me, speechless, and not even attempting to offer any rebuttal.

“Just leave, Neil. How many times are you going to make me say it?”

“Fine. Maybe we can talk in another decade.”

I stormed off, backed the Jeep out of her driveway and peeled away.

I was so distracted on the road as I headed back to Manhattan.

I was shaking the whole time, feeling furious that Becca didn’t trust me.

Again.

I couldn’t believe that she wasn’t even giving me a chance.

I kept thinking I should just cut my losses and avoid Becca if she was only going to keep doubting me. But I was in love with her. I had no doubts about that.

I started to imagine my rant sounded a lot like her ex, who was mean. I wondered if that was why she had looked like a deer in the headlights and said nothing at first.

When I got home, I cracked open a beer and turned the TV on to watch the local news. After finishing the bottle, I went to the kitchen to grab a second beer, and to look in the fridge for something to eat.

I was half-listening to the TV when I heard the newscaster say, “In other news, our resident playboy, Leviathan Tight End Neil Bowman, is garnering some unwanted attention again. A grandmother called multiple media outlets this morning to claim Bowman used a Christmas for Heroes event he participated in a couple weeks ago as hunting ground to pick up single moms.”

My mouth dropped open and I didn’t want to keep watching but I did, dumbfounded and spellbound at the lengths that Donna had sunk to.

“Here’s video of Bowman visiting a home in his hometown of Caldwell, New Jersey Christmas Eve, dressed as Santa with a bag of toys. While the video was provided by the Leviathans, when asked about the charity event, dedicated to helping military families, the team’s publicist denied any suggestion of impropriety on the part of Bowman but would not comment further. Here’s the Christmas for Heroes organizer, Tom Livingston.”

I heard Tom’s voice and felt grateful.

“Neil Bowman played Santa for our local event in his hometown, not seeking any attention for himself. Rather, he showed up to be there for the kids and to support our local service men and women. The suggestion that Bowman had ulterior motives, while hiding behind a white beard and oversized Santa suit, which I imagine after one hour, let alone four, was insanely uncomfortable, is utterly ridiculous. Bowman, as well as the other players who gave up their Sunday to participate in this event, have my heartfelt thanks for making a magical Christmas for these families.”

Well, that was nice of him, I thought. At least I feel slightly redeemed.

But still, I just stood in my kitchen in disbelief, wondering what the hell was wrong with the world that even this had to turn into a thing.

Slow news day?

I imagine I had the same look Becca had earlier today. I went to the living room to sit down again and picked up the phone to call Becca’s cell. It went straight to voicemail.