Santa's Secret Baby

“You think I don’t know you?” I reach up, and as I trace the edge of her cheek, she leans into the touch. “This.” I nod to the way she responds to me. “This is the only thing I need to know.”

“But—”

I shake my head, and she stops her objections. “Your favorite flavor of ice cream or which side of the bed you sleep on are tiny details compared to what I feel.” I smile, and it may be the first time I’ve done it since I was ripped away from her. “Those small things are insignificant in the woman you are, and I can learn the rest of them as we go. But this…” I trail my finger lower and between her breasts. I leave it there over her heart as I feel it beating against her chest. “This is the only thing that matters, and you can’t fight it.”

She swallows hard but doesn’t say a word as I wrap my hands around her back and hold her close. She rests her head on my chest, and I close my eyes, just savoring the feel of her soft frame against me. One song turns into another, and I don’t know how long we dance, but I’m not sure I ever want it to end.

“Mint chip,” she says softly, and I pull back to look down at her. “My favorite ice cream. And I like to sleep on the right side because it’s closer to the bathroom.” Her smile is shy as she tucks her chin, and I feel my own in answer.

“Mint chip is disgusting,” I tease, and the laugh that bubbles up in her surprises us both.

She rolls her eyes, and I feel her hands slide around my waist. “Oh yeah? And which one do you think is so great?”

“It used to be cookie dough.” She makes a face as I bring my hand up and slide my thumb across her bottom lip. “But I think now it’s coffee.”

“Coffee?” Her nose scrunches in the most adorable way.

“I think you’d had some right before that first kiss.” Her eyes widen, and because I can’t help myself, I lean down and touch my lips to hers.

I shouldn’t kiss her in a room full of people, but I know if I don’t I’ll break apart. It’s not long, and I don’t linger, but the way I look at her afterwards gives her the promise of more.

“I did,” she whispers softly, as if remembering that same moment with me.

The music picks up, and the crowd around us begins to dance faster. I look down at Jillian, and just as I’m about to ask her to leave with me, I hear someone running up behind me. Years behind bars looking over my shoulder have made me paranoid and jumpy. I swing around quickly while moving Jillian behind me to protect her.

But when I see a young girl standing there giving me a look like I’m crazy, I drop my defensive arms. I feel like an asshole, but before I can apologize, she turns her big blue eyes on me. Eyes so like my own, so like my brother Paul’s.

She just pushes past me like I'm a fluffy cloud in her way as she takes Jillian’s hands. “Mommy, can I have some more cookies? Aunt Eve said I had to ask.”

My spine locks in place as I stare down at the dark-haired little girl and then to her mother. This is her daughter. I’m speechless as I think back to every time Paul came to the prison. Never once did he mention they had a baby. He probably kept it from me so I wouldn’t try to know my niece. But as I stare at her profile, which is so similar to her beautiful mother, I can’t help but thank god I’m here. I got out, and now I’m here to meet this special girl that might be the only good thing that came out of Paul.

“Hello,” I say, crouching down to become eye level with her.

“Hi.” She looks me over. “I’m Rae.” She cocks her head to the side like she’s trying to decide something. “Why were you dancing with my mom?”

“Because she’s a fantastic dancer,” I say, trying to hide my smile.

“No, she’s not,” Rae disagrees and then shrugs. “I’ve tried to teach her, but she has no rhythm.”

I bite my lip to keep from laughing as I look up at Jillian, who is ghost white. “Maybe you can teach me then?” I say to Rae.

“Maybe.” She looks me up and down as if gauging my figure. “But probably not. You’re too bulky, like my uncle.”

I want to blurt out that I am her uncle, but I don’t. I don’t want to scare her, and clearly Jillian is taken aback by this meeting. There’s so much we need to talk about.