Poison

It was me who finally pulled the lace free and kept on kissing her.

I don’t know how long we were holding tight. I don’t know just how long that kiss ate us up and wouldn’t let go.

I do know that my dick was aching with the throb as I got hard all over again, and I do know it was her who hitched herself up and took me inside her.

It was a beautiful rhythm. Slow and steady. Neither of us wanting it to end.

“I love you,” she whispered, and her lips were puffy with kisses.

“I’ve always loved you,” I whispered back. “I always will.”

It was dark outside by the time I came inside her. She took it with a smile and held me tight, and I didn’t let her go. Couldn’t let her go.

We breathed together and lay together and lived in the moment. And that moment was bliss.

It was everything I’d ever wanted.Chapter Twenty-ThreeAnnaIt was a stunning release. Enough to obliterate the confusion and hurt and tragedy, even though it was just a flash of calm in the storm.

I fired the oven back up and took care of the lasagne while Lucas took care of the dogs, and it was good. Just what we needed as we munched at the table and soaked in the high.

I was determined to keep the high going as long as possible, finishing up my glass of prosecco before moving onto juice while Lucas finished the bottle. We smoked, and laughed, and remembered old times, and it was magical. Truly magical.

So was going to bed in his arms and sleeping, flesh to flesh.

Unfortunately the storm of life’s carnage was back in full force when we woke the next morning. We were both heavy with what was looming as he fucked me one final time in his bed. It was slow and steady, and everything we could do to delay what would be coming just as soon as we got ourselves up and dressed and facing the day. It was just a blink before Sunday was motoring ahead and I had to state the obvious.

“I need to go home. I have my parents to see, and Nicola is screaming to head over to mine, and I need to face this. I can’t keep holding it off.”

He nodded. Because he was in the same space, and I knew it.

He had his mother, and Maya, and Millie to face up to.

I put my clothes into quick wash and dry, minus filthy knickers, and presented myself in some kind of order in muddy shoes, then said goodbye to Bill and Ted while they wagged their tails like I was their lifelong friend.

Then Lucas took me home.

It was on the way that I made the dumb decision to head into the garage shop for a pack of my own cigarettes while he fuelled the truck, and it became dumb on top of dumb when we saw Hannah Ames in the opposite queue while me and Lucas were standing there together, clearly too close to be just friends.

Hannah Ames, matter of factly right there with her three kids bustling around her and asking for sweets from the counter.

Hannah Ames, one of Maya’s closest friends.

She smiled but it was fake, and we smiled back, but it was mortified.

And that was it. The storm reached a new high. Our days of secrecy were truly numbered.

There was a fresh round of heaviness in the truck as we reached my street.

“What now?” he asked, and I shrugged.

“We think, I guess. Think and hope for a miracle.”

He kissed me before driving off, and I made my walk back to my apartment feeling like a criminal, even though my heart was soaring high.

Vicky was scowling when I hit my living room, asking me a round of questions I struggled to answer. She had her gym clothes on and her hair scraped back, a big pot of yoghurt in her hand while she watched vintage comedies.

She put the TV on mute when I sat down next to her.

“You’re going to be in so much shit when people get hold of you,” she said, and I shrugged.

“I guess I face it, then,” I told her.

She muttered something damning and put the sound straight up again as I headed on through to shower.

One confrontation down.

A fair few harder ones still to go.

I replied to my parents saying that I was on my way for lunch, and I replied to Nicola saying I’d see her that evening, and she messaged back with nothing but a thumbs-up.

And then I did it. I dressed myself up, and put on my makeup as something vaguely like a mask, and I headed on over to my parents’ place on the other side of town.

Mum answered the door with a horrified expression, eyes full of nerves at just how the hell I was doing, and I felt like a criminal all over again, trying to soothe her with a smile as we made our way through to the living room.