Confessions of a Litigation God

“Do you want me to go?” I ask.

“No,” she says with confidence and keeps her smile in place. “Stay. Finish eating and let’s go shake the apartment’s foundation. ”

“Okay,” I say carefully, allowing a small smile in return.

“So, I found an interesting article that could help us on the speeding issue in the Jackson case,” she says suddenly, and just like that, Mac is turning this awkward moment around, and giving us both something to talk about that is safe.

We spend the next twenty minutes discussing the law, and Mac seems to be okay. She’s her usual funny and sassy self, making me laugh periodically without even trying. I help her clean up the remains of our dinner, Macy never having reappeared, and then she leads me back to her bedroom by the hand.

And f**k if something just doesn’t feel wrong about this.

Is it me swimming in guilt because I hurt Mac? Is it me having a moral conflict because all I seem to do is share a meal with her and then take advantage of what she offers me sexually?

When she closes the door behind us, she turns in my arms and wraps her arms around my neck. Her voice sounds like a hot summer night when she says, “I’m thinking doggie style should be on the agenda tonight. I promise not to sing ‘Who let the dogs out?’. ”

I’m still swimming in guilt, but I can’t help it… her words send a shot of lust to my dick, which immediately starts transforming into the hard beast that’s going to f**k her senseless… and apparently doggie style.

Sticking my nose in her neck, I inhale her scent. “You are so f**king sexy, Mac. What did I ever do to deserve someone like you?”

She doesn’t answer but reaches a hand down to cup my erection. She palms me gently, rubbing slightly on the outside edges of my dick. It’s sweetly erotic and makes me ache in my bones to have her.

Lifting my face from her neck, I look down at her and she’s watching me with sad eyes.

“I’m really sorry,” I tell her sincerely. It doesn’t change the truth of my words, because I was being truthful in what I said. I don’t take women that I’m f**king back to my place, and I’m so very sorry that it hurts Mac, but she really is nothing more than a woman I’m f**king. “I’m sorry if it hurt your feelings. ”

Mac places her fingers over my lips and says, “Shh. You don’t have to apologize. ”

“But I just want you to know that my intent wasn’t to—”

“Matt… I’m seriously okay. I’m a big girl, and I understand well what is going on between us. I don’t have any glamorous expectations that this is anything more than a f**k. You’ve been unbelievably clear about that with me and never once have you made me think otherwise. ”

“Haven’t I?” I can’t help but ask, because Mac can’t have feelings for me based on the phenomenal sex we’ve been having.

Or can she?

She smiles at me, a little mischievously, and says, “Well… I’ll admit… the flowers you brought tonight threw me off a little. ”

I knew those f**king flowers would haunt me. I knew they’d send the wrong message.

Except, I have no clue what message I was hoping they’d send. I just thought they were beautiful, and she deserved them. Nothing more. Doesn’t mean I want to get married or anything.

“Hey… where did you go just now?” Mac asks, taking her fingers and squeezing my jaw to get my attention.

“I just thought… I just thought the flowers were beautiful and that you deserved them. ”

“I deserved them?” she asks, eyebrow cocked.

“Yeah… you know… for that amazing b**w j*b you gave me this weekend,” I tell her with a devious smile.

She looks at me a moment and throws her head back, laughing at my audacity. She entrances me when she laughs, especially because she has the most gorgeous lips I’ve ever seen. So I just stare at her.

When she finally brings her eyes back to me, the humor is gone and desire is back in place. She squeezes my c**k again with her hand. “Okay… let’s put all this silliness to rest. Up for some doggy style?”

Relieved that we don’t have to talk about this anymore, I flex into her hand, I say, “You know the answer to that already. ”

Chapter 17

I take the long way to my office through the maze of cubicles and hallways. It’s no coincidence that the long way just happens to lead me past Mac’s office. Just thought I’d stick my head in, ogle her privately for a second or two, and say good morning. It’s not something I’ve ever done before, and I don’t know why I’m doing it now.

Maybe it has something to do with the uneasy feeling I woke with after last night with Mac. It’s still rubbing me a bit raw that I hurt her feelings. She let me off the hook easily, and I’m so grateful for that, but I don’t feel absolved.

As I turn the corner to the hallway that houses Mac’s office, I can see immediately she’s not in because the office is dark. I stroll right on by, not even taking a peek inside.

Odd that she’s not here. She usually always beats me into the office, and I know this because there’s usually an email from her on a case that’s waiting for me to read.

“What’s up, Matt?” Rob Gendhard says as he approaches me in the hall. He’s one of our litigation attorneys, been with me for almost eight years, and is a conceited jackass.

But he’s a hell of a lawyer.

“Not much,” I tell him affably as we come to a stop in the hall. “What do you have on the agenda today?”

“A Motion for Sanctions scheduled for this afternoon, but just catching up on stuff this morning. Heading down to Mac’s office right now. ”