Endurance (The Sin Trilogy 4)

Bleu grins, and I can tell she’s happy about it. “I figured as much.”

“We did it a lot. Five times since yesterday afternoon and not once with a condom.”

“Elli . . . I know you’re on the pill but that’s risky.”

“I didn’t want anything between us, Bleu. And he didn’t either so we did it bare. And I loved it.”

“Of course you loved it. Who doesn’t?”

“It was so good and he was so possessive and so alpha and was telling me I was his.”

“I love when Sin turns possessive alpha.”

“I loved it too but then everything felt like it shifted right before we came to the party.”

“How?”

“I was getting ready in the bathroom and he came up from behind and watched me in the mirror for a minute. He told me I looked beautiful and in the next breath said he needed to be inside me. He basically jumped on me and damn near ripped my panties taking them off and . . .”

Bleu is my sister. We’re close and I’ve always told her everything but I feel a bashful twinge about sharing the intimate details of what Jamie said and did to me.

“Annnd?” She stares at me in anticipation. Waiting. Waiting. Waiting. “Come on, Elli. I need details.”

No one is more possessive than Sin so nothing I tell her should come as a surprise.

“He said that he wanted me to smell like him and have a part of him inside me while I was with the brothers tonight.”

Bleu grins and nods; she knows what that means. I don’t have to explain that he didn’t pull out.

“It felt like he was marking me, which was hot, but it ended up feeling like he did it so he could have the satisfaction of knowing he’d just fucked me right before I was to meet the brothers.”

You’re wearing my brand tonight. “I could tell that he loved me coming here with that still inside me.”

“Wow. He has it bad for you.”

“But not bad enough to stop Sin from making that announcement.”

“I spoke with Jamie earlier. I could tell he was hurting and didn’t want the announcement to happen.”

“And yet he didn’t stop it.”

“I think he truly believes letting you go is in the best interest of your safety.”

“I’m sick of hearing about the best interest of my safety. How ’bout we consider what’s in the best interest of my happiness?” I’m really at a point where I want to say screw all of this and let’s just be together. In the end, what good is being safe if I’m miserable without him?

“Has he told you he loves you?”

“No.”

“He does. I see it when he talks about you.”

Sin comes up behind Bleu and wraps his arms around her waist as he places a kiss against the side of her face. “Hello, beautiful wife. Enjoying your free time while our children are being passed around?”

Bleu holds up her glass of wine. “I’m having a lovely time, husband.”

“Mmm. I love when you have that kind of lovely time. It’s a good indication I’ll get to have a lovely time.”

It doesn’t matter that my brother-in-law is second-in-command to one of the largest criminal organizations in Scotland. He is so damn cute with Bleu that it’s ridiculous. And the two of them with those three babies are cuteness overload.

I quickly scan the room for Jamie, but again, can’t find him. “Have you seen Jamie?”

“Not in a while.”

I spotted him with a bottle of whisky at a table in the corner—staring a hole through me and the brother I was talking to—but that was a while ago. “I haven’t seen him in over an hour.”

“Kenrick is manning the bar tonight. I saw Jamie visit him a few times so you might ask him.”

I’m a little embarrassed to bring up my earlier observation but he’s Jamie’s best friend. He might be able to shed a little light on the situation. “I saw Jamie leave with a woman earlier. I think they went to the guest house.”

“What woman?” Ain’t that the question of the hour.

“I have no idea. I’ve never seen her before tonight.” But then again, I’ve not seen most of these women here.

“What does she look like?”

“Blonde. Blunt bangs.” I touch my shoulder. “Straight hair cut to here. She was wearing a fifties-style emerald-green dress. The kind that’s tight at the waist and then poofs out.”

The woman could be a friend. A family member. A fuck buddy. I have no idea. I only know I hated the way it made me feel to see him leave with her.

Sin scans the crowd for the woman. “Do you see her now?”

“No. She disappeared about the same time as Jamie.” And I hate what that could mean. I don’t like the butterflies fluttering in my stomach. They aren’t the good kind Jamie usually gives me.

“Let’s talk to Kenrick before you jump to conclusions.”

“I’m already jumping to conclusions.” The nausea in my gut is proof.

Sin leads me behind the bar so we can speak privately with Kenrick. “Can I get you something, boss?”

“Not right now. We’re looking for Jamie.”

“Haven’t seen him since he had me give him a half-full bottle of Johnnie Walker a couple hours ago.”

“Jamie and a bottle of whisky. The fucker has gone and passed out somewhere. Probably in his car.”

“Then that’s where I’m going.”

Sin catches my upper arm as I turn to leave. “You’re at an event on Fellowship property. It isn’t safe for you to go without an escort.”

I can’t go to Jamie with an escort. Our secret relationship would be exposed. “I really need to find him. Will you take me to his Rover?”

“Of course.”

I hug Bleu and kiss the side of her face. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”

“Please do. I’m anxious to know how Jamie handles seeing the brothers compete for you.” I’m anxious to know too. A bottle of whisky doesn’t sound like the best way to deal with this situation.

Sin’s gun is in hand and he’s never more than a few feet from me as we walk to Jamie’s vehicle. I’ve seen security everywhere tonight so I’m a little surprised he feels the need to be this cautious. But what do I know? “Has there ever been an attack here?”

“No, but we just learned that The Order has taken a new leader. Since he’s new to power, he’ll be looking to prove himself. With Grieves, it was a given that they’d attack below the belt against our women. This is a particularly precarious situation because we don’t know the course this new leader will take.”

“Unpredictability must be a complication.”

“Unpredictability is another reason Jamie is hesitating with you.”

“Hesitating implies he’s going to claim me.”

“He’s going to, Ellison. He just needs a little more time. And maybe another little push. Who knows? Maybe seeing you with other men tonight was enough to open his eyes.”

“Tonight stung, Sin. He stood there and said nothing while those brothers squabbled over me. His expression was flat. Completely emotionless as though he didn’t care at all.”

“That was Jamie’s way of protecting you. He didn’t want the brothers to see him react so he underreacted. I know him. He was seething on the inside, hence the reason he’s somewhere drinking himself into a stupor.”

“I can’t lie. I’m not in the best place with Jamie right now.” He watched me get passed from one brother to the next without a word. He didn’t approach me. He didn’t ask me to dance. He didn’t utter a word to me once he handed me off to Logan.

And he was with another woman.

I come to a dead stop when I see the empty space where Jamie’s Range Rover was parked. “His car’s gone.”

“Are you sure? It’s much darker than when you arrived. The property probably looks different.”

“We parked next to that Porsche Cayenne. I’m positive because I peeked inside to see what the interior looked like.” The realization s

inks in and lands like a brick in the pit of my stomach. “He left me.”

“It’s possible he passed out and one of the brothers drove him back to the infirmary.”

One of the armed guards walking the perimeter approaches and Sin calls out to him. “Did you see Jamie leave?”

“Aye. He and Adaira left about an hour ago.”

Adaira.

“You’re certain about that?”

“Aye. Very certain. I told Adaira she looked lovely, and she thanked me.”

I feel sick. Gutted. Wrecked.

“I know it doesn’t look good, but it doesn’t mean what you’re thinking.”

The whole scene appears pretty cut and dry until I consider the last few days with Jamie.

I do own you, Mac.

I can’t think of anything I want more than you.

I’ve never been inside anyone like this. Only you.

You are so beautiful, Mac.

Please, Mac. I need this. I need you.

When we’re together, it’ll be about us and no one else.

The last few days with Jamie have been wonderful. It’s hard for me to believe that he’d have gone to all this trouble to work out spending the month together only to throw it away by getting drunk and fucking around with another woman.