Tempted

The entire drive to the hospital, my mother takes pity on me and doesn’t say a word. I look out the window into the dark abyss that matches my current state and don’t even realize when her driver pulls up to the hospital entrance.

She says something, but I barely hear her. I’m jumping out of the car and running into the emergency room. Eyes scanning the room for a doctor or anyone who can tell me if she’s okay.

“Drew,” Harper calls from behind me, running in with panic etched across her face. “Where’s Bailey?” she cries, tears streaming down her face. “Is she going to be okay?”

She runs into my arms, and I hold her while she sobs.

“Ms. Jameson?” a doctor asks, and Harper looks up, bobbing her head.

“How is she? Is she okay?” Harper asks the doctor now, and the doctor shakes her head.

Everything in me locks up.

“She was rushed back for emergency surgery. Her spleen was ruptured during impact and she has internal bleeding.” She takes a breath. “This is a very serious injury.”

“Will she be okay?” Harper whispers, and everything around me disappears while

I wait for the doctor to answer.

“Only time will tell,” she says. “We’ll keep you posted, but I suggest you stay close.”

I don’t move. I’m paralyzed in place, all my biggest fears playing out in my mind to further torment me. Harper steers me toward my seat, where I sit in shock. At some point, my mother joins me, but I don’t so much as breathe.

Bailey could die. I could lose her. I sit like this for what feels like hours. The clock ticking on the wall threatens to undo me. Every second that goes by without news sends me further down the rabbit hole of misery.

“What if she doesn’t make it, Mom?” I ask, breaking the deafening silence.

She turns in her seat, and I look over at her tear-filled face.

“We need to believe she will. She needs you to be strong for her, Drew.”

“I caused this,” I grate. “It’s my fault.”

“Whatever you did is done, Drew. But right now, you need to put your self-pity aside and put her first.”

“I’m useless. I can’t do anything.” My voice rises, drawing unwanted attention from a few others sitting here waiting on news of their loved ones, but I don’t give a fuck.

“I’m here, but there’s nothing I can do.” Her hand lands on my knee.

“You can pray, Drew.” And I do. For the first time in probably my whole life, I walk to the chapel and fall to my knees.

I pray for Bailey. That she’ll survive. That she’ll be given a second chance to live a full, healthy life.

I pray for my sins, and for everyone I’ve ever hurt.

I pray for the chance to hold Bailey in my arms. Even if she chooses to walk away afterward.

“Drew, the doctor’s waiting for you,” my mom calls from the chapel door.

I say one last prayer for Bailey. Please don’t take her from me.

66

Bailey

“You were in an accident. A rather severe one,” the nurse says, checking my vitals and writing something on a notepad. “They had to cut you out of the car. You’re lucky to be alive.”

My eyes go wide, and I start to feel like I can’t breathe. A machine starts to beep erratically.

“Calm down, Bailey. You’re going to be okay,” my mother says from my side.

“W-What happened to me?”

“Your spleen was ruptured, and you needed a blood transfusion.” Harper’s matter-of-fact words are just what I need at this moment. I need facts. For once.

I take a deep, cleansing breath. “I-I saw Daddy,” I whisper, looking at my sister. “I dreamed of him. He held my hand while I was trapped in the car. He told me help was coming.” A tear falls down her cheek, and she wipes it away, smiling.

“I have no doubt he was right there beside you, Bailey. You two always had such a special bond.” This time it’s my mother speaking. Her words are tender. Heartfelt.

I process this news, growing more grateful that I’m alive. I know how serious a spleen injury can be. I’m lucky to be alive. Perhaps this entire event has been a wake-up call to my mother too? Only time will tell, but I decide to extend an olive branch. She is here, after all.

Reaching out, I lay my hand on top of hers. She smiles, sadly, and tears stream down her face. “I love you, Bailey.”

“I love you too, Mom.”

We sit in comfortable silence for a few minutes before I turn to the nurse still checking my vitals. “What happened to Reese?” I ask. Despite the entire accident being his fault, I still want to know he’s all right. He wasn’t in his right mind. It doesn’t make it okay, but I don’t want him to be dead.