Ryke gestures to the silent room. “Forget this. It never fucking happened.” He grips his cell in a tight fist and his dark concern pinpoints on me.
I doubt he’d care as much if he thought I didn’t care, but I can’t even pretend to be nonchalant about it. Because Connor Cobalt and Loren Hale just saw a close-up of Ryke sticking his dick in me. Oh and not to mention, the entire room heard my orgasm.
The couch cushion undulates as Ryke sinks beside me. He holds my horror-stricken body, and I bury my face in the crook of his arm and mutter, “What the fuck.” I rarely even curse but this is the most accurate phrase to describe the situation and how I feel.
What. The. Fuck.
Ryke presses his palm to my burning cheek and forehead and then kisses the top of my head.
My heart rate slows a fraction with his compassion and concern, but then, of course, someone worsens the already worst moment.
“Look, love,” Lo says to Lily. “Two-thirds of us have sex tapes, and we’re not one of them.”
Ryke glowers. “It’s not a fucking sex tape.”
Lo tilts his head like you have to be fucking kidding. “Just because it’s shitty quality doesn’t mean it’s not a sex tape, bro. It has audio and graphic nudity. I know porn when I see it.”
Oh my God. Please stop talking about this, Lo.
Everyone begins taking seats around the room, and the penis piñata falls out of the tub. A Blow Me balloon pops, and I refuse to make eye contact with Connor. Besides Ryke, the safest place to look is at Rose.
She crosses her ankles on the Queen Anne chair, coming down from her initial bout of shock. “We have to move on from this.”
Please, yes.
Ryke strokes my hair, and I take a deep breath.
Lo snaps, “That’s easy for you to say. You didn’t see the video or your brother’s dick pics.”
Ugh, the heat of this moment will not end.
“That’d be impossible,” Rose retorts, “I don’t have a brother.”
Lo shoots her a sharpened glare. “Why do you always have to be such a smarty-pants, Angelica?”
“Because I loathe you.” She whips her hair off her left shoulder and then clasps her hands.
No one chastises us for filming the video. If it leaked online, people wouldn’t be able to tell who’s in the clip, too close-up. Ryke could also run naked through Philly with paparazzi taking photos and he wouldn’t even care. He told me that once, along with: “My body is my fucking body, even if someone sees it, it’s still mine.”
I realized something then. Each of us falls under different spectrums of what makes us comfortable and what makes us tic. I like that I’ve found my boundaries and that Ryke knows his.
The room hushes.
Through the tense silence and their brief glances at me, all I hear is, we just saw your anatomy and Ryke’s anatomy join forces in the most intimate way possible. How do you feel about that?
Not good.
Not good at all.
If only the cake arrived right now. Cake would fix this.
I risk a peek at Connor. His brow arches at me in knowing, not uncomfortable at all.
My neck scalds, and Ryke kisses my temple, trying to fix this so I’m no longer burnt red.
“So…” Lily says on the loveseat beside her husband, her Maid of Honor crown crooked. “…you watch it while you…have sex?”
“Mmmm?” My mind is like does not compute. Can’t compute. Males named Connor & Loren in room. I’ve made plenty of sex jokes in the past, but I totally blank when my real sex life is blown up in their faces. “Mmmhmm.” I nod. “Yep. You know…all of that.” I try to plaster on a smile.
Dig that grave, Daisy.
“I can’t say this is something I’ve never seen before,” Connor quips to Ryke. Since he saw Ryke come on my face? “Personally, I’d like to stop meeting your dick like this.”
“Fuck off,” Ryke says.
Lo begins to laugh, his comic book in hand.
Lily smacks his chest. “It’s not funny. My sister is upset.”
He feigns hurt, hand to his heart.
She goes for the jugular by trying to steal his comic. She only grips one end and he yanks the other, morphing into a tug-of-war. Her cheeks redden in effort while Lo barely does a thing.
“Let…go,” she huffs.
“Is that a little bicep?” He squeezes her nonexistent muscle. “Damn, love, don’t Hulk out on me.”
“You’re being an ass.”
“I’m always an ass, Lily Hale, and I don’t like sharing my toys.” He pries the comic, and she loses her grip completely.
I clap at her valiant effort, happy for the distraction.
Rose rises on her heels and then takes center room. I straighten up, realizing that she’s shifting the spotlight off me too. She has a penis wand in hand, so confident and poised.
I immediately smile, less and less mortified.
Ryke seems to relax when I begin to too.
“Bets are open,” Rose declares and gestures the wand from her chest to Connor’s. “We’ve decided not to know the gender of the baby, so you all can start guessing.”
“Depends on what you want,” Lo says first, “and then I’m going to bet on the exact opposite.”
Rose rolls her eyes dramatically. “Juvenile as always, Loren.”
Before Lo can retort, Lily cuts in with a raise of her hand. Rose points the wand at my older sister. “Go.”
Lily stares at the penis wand for an extra second, her eyes narrowing—probably not used to being called on like that. At least, this is my theory.
Lily clears her throat. “Are you still leaving how many children you have up to fate?” Good question. A while back, Rose declared that she’d only have as many kids as it’d take for Jane to have a sister. That means if she has a daughter next, the Cobalt family will be finished growing.
“Yes,” Rose says. “And I want whatever fate brings me.” Her eyes flit to Lo. “So I’ll be happy with either a boy or a girl.” My older sister has always been superstitious and a believer in destiny and so forth, so her proclamation doesn’t surprise anyone.
“And you, love?” Lo asks Connor.
He smiles. “I’d like a boy.” He doesn’t explain further, but we all know he wants a large family. A boy would mean they would try again for a girl. I wonder why he agreed to her whole “fate plan” if he really wants the big Cobalt empire. But then again, I think I already know. I see it in the way he looks at her, like he’d give up this one thing in his life if it’d please Rose.
It’s love.
“Bets?” Rose asks, waving the penis wand around. Lily scoots back like she’s scared it’s going to fling in her face.
My eyes fall to Rose’s belly and I frown. She looks…a little bigger than she was last time. Maybe? I don’t know. It’s not like I stare at Rose’s pregnant belly a lot, especially not recently.
I have to ask though.
“Rose,” I say with a fading smile, “have you been lying about how far along you are? It’s okay if you have…”
Her face falls, and regret assails me for a hot second. I called Rose a liar, which is somewhere around “cheater” in her rings of hell.
“I’m sorry,” I say with all sincerity, “I just—”
“No,” she says firmly. “I wouldn’t lie to you about my pregnancy.”
I can tell I hurt her, even thinking that she would have deceived me. This is Rose Calloway. The sister who’d hop into a sinking ship with Lily and me. Just to be another pair of hands, urgently and untiringly scooping water out until we all drowned together.
And not only that—she just deflected an incredibly embarrassing moment of mine with ease and without question.
I explain myself the best I can. “It’s just that you look a little bigger than last time.”
Lo audibly winces. “It’s been nice knowing you.”
Rose raises a hand at Lo to shut up, but her strong gaze never leaves me. “I
was going to tell you tomorrow. I didn’t want to take away from your party.”
“Okay…” I’m lost on where she’s headed.
Connor wears a knowing look, but everyone else seems just as confused as me.
“Christ, don’t say it,” Lo interjects, “the baby has hooves.”
“Babies,” Rose amends.
My mind can barely process the word. Or even the plural form of it. Lo immediately glares. “You were going to let us bet on the gender when you’re having goddamn twins? That’s the dirtiest thing you two have done in a while.”
I tune out the rest of their conversation, but the air coils in taut strands. I stand to go hug my sister, wanting people to keep it light. We’re happy. We’re all happy. I don’t know why I have to keep repeating it.
Rose points that penis wand at me threateningly. “No hugs.” She’s not smiling and I wonder if it hurts her to look at me. If it will always hurt to look at me.
“Congratulations, big sis,” I say, my smile rising with my joy. However dulled, it’s still there for her. “I hope it’s two boys, so you can have your empire.”
She gives me a look like what the fuck are you talking about and turns the penis wand on herself, jabbing it at her chest. “I said nothing about an empire.”
Before I can say anything more, Lily attack hugs her from the side, coming out of seemingly nowhere. Rose glowers at her like she’s a barnacle that has attached itself to the S.S. Rose Calloway Cobalt.
Ryke touches the back of my thigh and I turn to see him. My smile wanes at his hardened brows and those brown eyes that reflect all our struggles. We’re still trying to have one baby, and Rose was lucky enough to have two.
The pang of jealously slides below my happiness for her, but I can’t ignore its existence. I hate that it’s there, honestly. I just wish this was easier.
I slump down beside Ryke and nudge his shoulder with mine. He shoves my right shoulder with more force.
I grin and shove him back.